Wordgag ツ

10,000+ funny quotes

Activity Log ✨

Someone from 🇲🇦 has shared:

Pool rules: You’re not allowed to do anything that begins with the words ‘Hey everyone watch this!’

Someone from 🇸🇻 has downloaded:

Yoda, seeing himself in 4K: HDMI

Someone from 🇵🇼 has downloaded:

Thank God for headphones and day dreaming.

Someone from 🇧🇮 has downloaded:

Love triangle? You mean this Dorito?

Someone from 🇳🇬 has viewed:

It’s so much easier to suggest solutions when you don’t know too much about the problem.

Someone from 🇮🇳 has copied:

Big fan of calling artists their first name and then the band name as their last name.

Someone from 🇨🇩 has copied:

(Flirting) What’s every single thing you’ve ever thought?

Someone from 🇷🇺 has copied:

The only talent I have is spending more than I bring in.

Someone from 🇨🇿 has copied:

I’m like a semicolon, most people don’t know what to do with me.

Someone from 🇹🇳 has shared:

Asking Santa Claus for nudes.

Funny Quotes Data 🤓

New Funny Quotes

0 this month

Funny Quotes Total

15,269

Funny Quotes Topics

17,387

Funny Quotes Images

15,269

Updated

Dec 31, 2025

Users Online

3,721

Social Media Log 💫

Making waves on Telegram:

Are you in love with me yet or do I have to post another Spotify link?

Trending via Telegram:

At my next job, I’m gonna lie about having a kid so I can leave the office anytime I want like everyone else with children.

Breaking via WhatsApp:

I have a very particular set of useless skills.

Just shared via Reddit:

When people talk about enriching their lives, I assume they’ve found a way to add more cheese.

Making waves on Snapchat:

I wonder how much time The Weeknd saves not typing that extra e.

Freshly posted on YouTube:

Day number 3 without coffee: Lost hearing in my left eye.

Going viral on Snapchat:

Netflix will help you finish spelling the name of the movie you’re looking for, and then tell you they don’t have it.

Making waves on YouTube:

“It’s all in your head!” Correct! Unfortunately, I am also in there.

Spotted on Facebook:

When you realize a 9 to 5 is actually an 8 to 7, since you cannot teleport to work.

My best three minutes of sleep are the ones right before the alarm goes off.

4 months ago

Download image ↓

Commentary:
Just when I hit the sleep lottery, my alarm decides to call in the morning wake-up police 🚨⏰😂

alarm, before, best, humor, minutes, morning, nap, ones, rest, right, sleep, three, tired, wake up

Trending Funny Quotes 👇

About to form my very first opinion.

0

2 months ago

form, forming, funny moment, humor, moment, opinion, self-discovery
The more attention you get on this website, the less you enjoy being on it.

0

5 months ago

attention, being, enjoy, enjoyment, experience, irony, less, media, online, online experience, social, social media, website
Potato chips ARE vegetables! I exclaim as I tear open the third bag.

0

2 months ago

bag, chips, food, food joke, humor, i, joke, obsession, open, potato, potato chips, snack, snack obsession, tear, tearing, tearing open, third, vegetables
Why didn’t Scooby Doo smell that the ghosts were human?

0

2 months ago

cartoon, doo, ghost, ghosts, human, humor, joke, mystery, scooby, Scooby Doo, smell
If she doesn’t post you, take her phone, go live and introduce yourself!

0

2 months ago

date, humor, introduce, live, media, phone, post, prank, relationship, social, social media
If my family starts talking politics at Thanksgiving, I’m changing the subject by announcing I’m pregnant.

0

2 months ago

announcement, change, changing, conversation, family, holiday, humor, politics, pregnancy, pregnant, subject, subject change, talking, Thanksgiving

New Funny Quotes

🎲 Random Funny Quotes

Welcome to Wordgag! 😉✌️ Enjoy endless laughter with our collection of funny quotes guaranteed to crack you up. 😂💥

🎉🥂 New Year Quotes

Social Media Stars ⭐

30 shares on WhatsApp this month:

Do you also sometimes turn on the TV just so you have background noise or am I weird?

63 shares on Reddit this month:

I was having a great time until I remembered that I was ugly.

45 shares on TikTok this month:

In six days God created heaven and earth. On the seventh day, in the interests of balance, the BBC interviewed Satan.

64 shares on Slack this month:

If you say my name three times in the mirror, I show up and kiss you on the forehead.

33 shares on Messenger this month:

If your coffee shop has a passive-aggressive ‘no Wi-Fi, pretend it’s the old days’ sign, I’m gonna smoke in there and pay 50 cents for coffee.

74 shares on Threads this month:

The streets are not for me. I belong in an enchanted forest, eating berries, and talking to my animal friends.

66 shares on Threads this month:

I’m not saying Lois Lane is a bad investigative journalist, but my friend Greg didn’t wear glasses to work yesterday and I recognized him by lunch time.

16 shares on Snapchat this month:

I do not care how bad the relationship is, I am NOT calling a radio station for advice.

64 shares on Snapchat this month:

Happiness is when you really have nothing to do with people you want absolutely nothing to do with.

11 shares on Twitch this month:

My life would be pointless without cheese. Or as the famous song goes: “Ain’t no sunshine when cheese gone!”

Activity Log ✨

Someone from 🇶🇦 has bookmarked:

Interesting people are my favorite endangered species.

Someone from 🇲🇻 has copied:

Yes, my sex drive is higher than my will to live, and what about it?

Someone from 🇯🇲 has copied:

One of the hardest things to do as an adult is to go back to work after a long weekend.

Someone from 🇳🇮 has bookmarked:

“I’m not ordering fries, I’ll just eat some of yours!” -Former friends of mine

Someone from 🇺🇾 has viewed:

Shout-out to the lifeguard who recommended moving the potato to the front of my Speedo.

Someone from 🇩🇲 has bookmarked:

I have no need to judge people because of their religion, skin color or sexual orientation. Bad behavior is enough for me.

Someone from 🇿🇼 has copied:

Hey, boy, are you the worst-case scenario? Because you’re all I think about.

Someone from 🇲🇷 has bookmarked:

You don’t have to be crazy to hang out with me. I’ll train you.

Someone from 🇲🇦 has shared:

A gentleman always straightens out the vending machine after shaking it.

Someone from 🇹🇼 has shared:

Karma has taught me to never laugh at a stranger being attacked by a seagull.

Social Media Log 💫

Trending via Instagram:

Waiting for my wife to approve my new year’s resolution of making independent decisions.

Spotted on Twitch:

Chuck Norris can kill two stones with one bird.

Making waves on Slack:

Look, babe, I’m sorry. If your fake British accent keeps being this geographically inconsistent, I’m going to have to cancel the medieval roleplay sex.

Broadcasted on Instagram:

Getting up early would be easier if we could keep our eyes closed.

Making waves on YouTube:

Turning regret into ulcers since the day I was born.

Breaking via Reddit:

Just accidentally closed a tab I’ve had been meaning to read for the past 2 years.

Spotted on Pinterest:

Not now darling, mummy’s influencing on the www.

Freshly posted on Messenger:

I remember when my boss asked me who is the stupid one, me or him? And I told him everyone knows he doesn’t hire stupid people.

Going bananas on Twitch:

I’m so thankful I had a childhood before technology took over.

Breaking via Reddit:

Don’t talk to me about regrets if you’ve never had someone’s name tattooed on you.

Wordgag ツ

Activity Log ✨

My best three minutes of sleep are the ones right before the alarm goes off.

Related Funny Quotes 🤝

About to form my very first opinion.

The more attention you get on this website, the less you enjoy being on it.

Potato chips ARE vegetables! I exclaim as I tear open the third bag.

Why didn’t Scooby Doo smell that the ghosts were human?

If she doesn’t post you, take her phone, go live and introduce yourself!

If my family starts talking politics at Thanksgiving, I’m changing the subject by announcing I’m pregnant.

Social Media Stars ⭐

Trending Topics 📁

Activity Log ✨