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10,000+ funny quotes

Activity Log ✨

Someone from πŸ‡ΏπŸ‡¦ has copied:

I love how unforgiving soy sauce is. Cause you know immediately when you did too much with her.

Someone from πŸ‡§πŸ‡΄ has viewed:

Remember when movies felt real, and foreheads could wrinkle.

Someone from πŸ‡²πŸ‡½ has viewed:

I am cassette tape years old.

Someone from πŸ‡―πŸ‡΄ has shared:

Climbing Mount Everest looks super boring and dumb. You just walk uphill, are cold and at the brink of death. No thanks.

Someone from πŸ‡¨πŸ‡± has downloaded:

If David Bowie taught us anything, it’s that being a little weird is better than being forgettable.

Someone from πŸ‡­πŸ‡³ has shared:

Imagine hating me, and I’m just over here talking baby talk to my plants.

Someone from πŸ‡¨πŸ‡΄ has copied:

Adulting is realizing you can’t skip work like you skipped class.

Someone from πŸ‡²πŸ‡© has downloaded:

‘You’re going to die alone!’ Okay, when did dying become a group project?

Someone from πŸ‡ΈπŸ‡Ώ has viewed:

Life is way too short to pretend you’re not into some freaky stuff.

Someone from πŸ‡°πŸ‡Ό has bookmarked:

These days I just accept the website cookies without any protest. Website is like Grandma, I’m not gonna fight with her.

Funny Quotes Data πŸ€“

New Funny Quotes

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Funny Quotes Total

15,753

Funny Quotes Topics

17,766

Funny Quotes Images

15,753

Updated

Feb 3, 2026

Users Online

3,541

Social Media Log πŸ’«

Breaking via Messenger:

All I do is go to work, come home, blink and suddenly I’m back at work.

Going bananas on Discord:

That awkward moment when you have to pretend that you like the gift.

Spotted on TikTok:

Can I be speaker? I’m pretty good at saying a lot without saying anything at all.

Trending via Facebook:

If I was a stray cat, I’d follow you home and let you domesticate me.

Just landed via Discord:

It’s difficult to play hard to get when I’m already hard to want.

Seen just now on Reddit:

Cooking with glasses on is so humiliating. Why did I just get blinded by steam?

Going bananas on Discord:

The prettier you are, the weirder it gets.

Shared recently on Reddit:

It’s amazing how so many people can rave about Star Wars or Star Trek and at the same time make sure that the only realistic future prospect is Mad Max.

Trending via WhatsApp:

People who say β€œteamwork makes the dream work” are the reason that some people want to punch other people in the face.

Just landed via LinkedIn:

“Comparison is the thief of joy!” Well, not if you’re better than everyone else.

12 Funny agreement quotes

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Social Media Stars ⭐

23 shares on Instagram this month:

My cat, who has no job and pays no rent, is apparently unhappy with his fancy new cat food, and I, for some reason, am currently on my way back to the store to rectify the matter.

19 shares on LinkedIn this month:

Excuse me, can you direct me to the nonsense?

84 shares on YouTube this month:

I hate listening to a rapper that I used to adore, and they just don’t have it anymore.

29 shares on WeChat this month:

I love when people say “be yourself,” like I haven’t already been doing that and scaring everyone off.

19 shares on Slack this month:

Why does the phone ring longer when you’re ignoring the call?

87 shares on YouTube this month:

“Treat yourself. You deserve it,” she says while adding the shoes to her cart.

62 shares on Discord this month:

Is there a word for FOMO but it’s already happened and you didn’t know about it when it was happening?

85 shares on Messenger this month:

Staring at your phone is a great way to miss a few years of your life.

31 shares on Snapchat this month:

Stick with me and you’ll go places. None of them good, but still.

47 shares on X this month:

Girls will be like β€œI have so much to do” then grab some snacks and start watching a 10 part docuseries on serial killers.

Trending Topics πŸ“

activity communication day food frustration fun humor i irony joke just know life love me media people procrastination relationship sarcasm social social media someone technology time want work

Hot Jokes πŸ’₯

21 folks are currently checking πŸ‘€

I will never understand people who don’t gasp dramatically at rainbows.

15 folks are currently checking πŸ‘€

I’ve reached the age where I would rather go to a hardware store than a club.

8 folks are currently checking πŸ‘€

My body snaps, crackles, and pops louder than my cereal.

20 folks are currently checking πŸ‘€

Bought some coconut shampoo, but when I got home, I realised I didn’t have a coconut.

12 folks are currently checking πŸ‘€

I think during winter we should also get to work less hours in a day, just like the sun.

20 folks are currently checking πŸ‘€

No revenge, because I don’t even remember what happened.

20 folks are currently checking πŸ‘€

Washing machine minutes are not the same as regular minutes.

12 folks are currently checking πŸ‘€

My wife bought new towels and they’re different colors, so I know the entire color scheme of my house is about to change.

8 folks are currently checking πŸ‘€

Tried Adderall to help my productivity but now I’m just intensely aware of all the things I should be doing.

25 folks are currently checking πŸ‘€

Spending money is too easy. For my bank account’s sake, I need a bridge troll to ask me three riddles before I’m allowed to buy something.

Funny Quotes Data πŸ€“

New Funny Quotes

calculating…

Funny Quotes Total

15,753

Funny Quotes Topics

17,766

Funny Quotes Images

15,753

Updated

Feb 3, 2026

Users Online

3,386

Activity Log ✨

Someone from πŸ‡§πŸ‡³ has downloaded:

Nothing like waking up on a Friday and finding out it’s Tuesday.

Someone from πŸ‡±πŸ‡Ύ has bookmarked:

Do cats have a sense of causation between grooming themselves and coughing up hairballs, or do they think it’s just an annoying separate thing which just happens to them sometimes?

Someone from πŸ‡¬πŸ‡Ή has downloaded:

I respect the moon’s unwillingness to be photographed on a phone.

Someone from πŸ‡¦πŸ‡± has shared:

Just had a salad but it didn’t make me laugh like women in stock photos.

Someone from πŸ‡΅πŸ‡¬ has shared:

I learn from the mistakes of people who took my advice.

Someone from πŸ‡³πŸ‡Ώ has viewed:

Lately, when I meet new people, I ask them what their hobbies are instead of what they do for work, and let me tell you, the conversations have been absolutely top tier!

Someone from πŸ‡²πŸ‡­ has viewed:

How many cups of coffee is OK to have every day? Is it eight? I’m pretty sure it’s eight.

Someone from πŸ‡¨πŸ‡Ύ has bookmarked:

Give us this day our daily internet validation.

Someone from πŸ‡ΉπŸ‡Ώ has shared:

I asked myself if I was the problem and we said no.

Someone from πŸ‡―πŸ‡² has copied:

Squirrels get most of their energy from chewing on powerlines, that acorn thing is just for show.

Social Media Log πŸ’«

Spreading quickly via WhatsApp:

Hey, you should start your own business and then mind it.

Making waves on Facebook:

Why read the room when you can leave the room?

Spotted on Pinterest:

I now also have a device that tells me whether I’ve taken enough steps today. If I don’t make it one day, it barks and poops in my apartment.

Freshly posted on WeChat:

Bone broth? Oh, you mean skeleton soup.

Trending via TikTok:

Got electrocuted while fixing the doorbell, and now I can hear my girlfriend’s thoughts. She’s thinking she should have called an electrician.

Going viral on WeChat:

People will be like β€œthere is no right or wrong way to do it” until you do it the wrong way.

Making waves on Instagram:

My body is a machine that turns traumatic experiences into 10 likes on X.

Freshly posted on Discord:

There are many people who don’t like me and I am one of them.

Making waves on Twitch:

Just realized doors really are floating in the air 24/7. I don’t like that.

Freshly posted on Reddit:

Called in, “Taking a gap year.”

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