Wordgag ツ

10,000+ funny quotes

Activity Log ✨

Someone from 🇸🇿 has downloaded:

I be like, “I needed this,” and it’s just me getting drunk.

Someone from 🇲🇦 has bookmarked:

My trauma is between me and this bartender. The rest of you, mind your business.

Someone from 🇰🇿 has viewed:

Hey, can I get an ETA on that “this too shall pass”?

Someone from 🇧🇯 has downloaded:

Don’t think my brain is braining properly today.

Someone from 🇱🇹 has viewed:

Instead of calling it the John I’m going to start calling my bathroom the Jim. That way I can say I go to the Jim every morning.

Someone from 🇸🇩 has copied:

Unfortunately for things, they have no choice but to work out for me.

Someone from 🇺🇸 has copied:

Lie about the gap in your resume. Tell them you had to help some Hobbits take a ring to Mordor or something.

Someone from 🇩🇴 has bookmarked:

My favorite conspiracy theory is that things will get better.

Someone from 🇳🇴 has downloaded:

If I don’t text you saying Happy New Year, we still gang, I’m just lazy.

Someone from 🇲🇲 has viewed:

Take my advice, I’m not using it.

Funny Quotes Data 🤓

New Funny Quotes

105 this month

Funny Quotes Total

15,374

Funny Quotes Topics

17,485

Funny Quotes Images

15,374

Updated

Jan 2, 2026

Users Online

3,584

Social Media Log 💫

Making waves on Threads:

Descibe your boobs only using a picture of them.

Shared recently on Reddit:

Sports are better when you have hate in your heart.

Just shared via Snapchat:

I’ve finally found out what chronology is. And it’s about time.

Breaking via Reddit:

Ancestors survived five mass extinctions on earth for me to be killed by a house cat I was trying to put a Christmas sweater on.

Seen just now on Reddit:

My husband and I were doing yard work, but I started a fight so I could storm off into the air conditioning.

Shared recently on Twitch:

You’re not a knight in shining armor, you’re just a knob in Under Armour.

Seen just now on Reddit:

I wanna meet the person whose parents are super disappointed he went to medical school instead of becoming a stand-up comedian.

Just shared via TikTok:

You wake up at 6 a.m. and it’s like you have 48 hours instead of 24.

Spotted on Twitch:

I try to contain my craziness, but the lid keeps popping off.

Going viral on Threads:

I’m at the age where a house arrest no longer sounds like the worst thing.

Funny erase quotes

Funny erase quotes bring a hilarious twist to wiping mistakes away ✏️😂 Whether you’re a student, artist, or just someone who loves a good chuckle, these witty lines will make erasing feel less like a blunder and more like a comedy act 🎭✨ Say goodbye to frustration and hello to laughs every time you hit the eraser! 🧽🤣 #EraseTheStress #LaughItOff

New funny erase quotes 👇

All funny erase quotes & images can be used for free for non-commercial purposes 👌

New Funny Quotes
🎲 Random Funny Quotes

Welcome to Wordgag! 😉✌️ Enjoy endless laughter with our collection of funny quotes guaranteed to crack you up. 😂💥

Social Media Stars ⭐

51 shares on Instagram this month:

Met a microbiologist once. They’re a lot bigger than I imagined.

39 shares on WhatsApp this month:

People thinking you’re dumb is one of the best advantages you can have.

71 shares on LinkedIn this month:

Christmas can be really hard for single people. Everyone else is having a brilliant time and we have to hide the fact that every day is like that for us.

33 shares on Instagram this month:

Failed relationships can be described as so much wasted make-up.

21 shares on X this month:

Vanilla perfumes are so nice. It’s like walking into a bakery but you are the bakery.

36 shares on LinkedIn this month:

Divorcing my wife to focus on my porn addiction.

46 shares on Discord this month:

My wife is napping quietly and the villain of this story is about to be this sneeze.

57 shares on Threads this month:

If my wife doesn’t win anything on this $1 scratch ticket, it’s going to go down as one of the worst anniversary gifts ever.

73 shares on Telegram this month:

Slowly descending into madness. Anyone want anything?

37 shares on Twitch this month:

The human brain is amazing. It functions 24/7 from the day we’re born and only stops when you’re taking a test or speaking to someone attractive.

Trending Topics 📁

activity communication day food frustration fun humor i irony joke just know life love me media people procrastination relationship sarcasm social social media someone technology time want work

Hot Jokes 💥

6 folks are currently checking 👀

Folding laundry is like packing to stay home.

24 folks are currently checking 👀

Well, I’ve been depressed and poor, but sure, we’ll call it intermittent fasting.

8 folks are currently checking 👀

I’m not superstitious because it brings bad luck.

20 folks are currently checking 👀

I’m fairly certain the person who put the first “r” in February also decided how to spell Wednesday.

21 folks are currently checking 👀

Changing my relationship status from “Single” to “I give up.”

20 folks are currently checking 👀

Coke tastes like tapping into your ancient ancestral petroleum reserves, while Sprite tastes like being connected to a big, beautiful energy grid.

18 folks are currently checking 👀

Listen up. If he hooks his sunglasses in the front collar of his shirt, he’s got something important to say.

23 folks are currently checking 👀

Had an interview today, and my belly rumbled. The lady goes, “Missed lunch?” I told her, “Nah, I’m hungry for success!”

13 folks are currently checking 👀

I don’t want to adult anymore. Don’t even want to be human. I want to be a goat. Jump around randomly, eat what I want, and head-butt anyone who annoys me.

8 folks are currently checking 👀

Worst feeling in the world is when you are loyal to all your girlfriends but your favorite one is cheating on you.

Funny Quotes Data 🤓

New Funny Quotes

105 this month

Funny Quotes Total

15,374

Funny Quotes Topics

17,485

Funny Quotes Images

15,374

Updated

Jan 2, 2026

Users Online

3,274

Activity Log ✨

Someone from 🇸🇴 has shared:

At my next job, I’m gonna lie about having a kid so I can leave the office anytime I want like everyone else with children.

Someone from 🇬🇧 has shared:

Drilling for oil is well boring.

Someone from 🇧🇬 has downloaded:

The good news is cannon deaths have gone down dramatically in the last hundred years.

Someone from 🇦🇲 has viewed:

If you eat well and exercise, you’ll die fit.

Someone from 🇻🇨 has bookmarked:

Accidentally clicked a post about UFOs, and now my Facebook algorithm thinks I’m a much different person.

Someone from 🇵🇱 has bookmarked:

Job posting: $15/hr for master’s degree. Burrito menu: $23 for bean and cheese burrito.

Someone from 🇸🇳 has downloaded:

Don’t underestimate your white tee and denim jeans.

Someone from 🇭🇳 has shared:

Ever since I was a little girl I knew I wanted to leave work early.

Someone from 🇹🇩 has shared:

That little stroll to the coffee maker makes me happy every morning.

Someone from 🇺🇸 has downloaded:

Have you ever pretended not to look at the biscuits or sweets being handed around the room, and acted surprised when you got offered one?

Social Media Log 💫

Going viral on TikTok:

When one door closes, lock it securely, along with all your other doors and windows, before any inspirational quotes get in.

Shared recently on Telegram:

Boss: Why do I have to always come and find you? Me: Because a good employee is hard to find.

Just landed via Threads:

The sun is so successful because it has the perfect bedtime and morning routines.

Seen just now on Snapchat:

If the math problems are too difficult for me, I post them online and write: “Only 1 in 10 can solve this problem.”

Freshly posted on Pinterest:

No, thanks—social drama. Puberty sucked enough the first time around.

Breaking via Twitch:

“Grey” is a better spelling than “gray” because “e” is a greyer letter than “a.” I will not elaborate.

Seen just now on Instagram:

I wish tree puns were more poplar.

Trending via YouTube:

Kim Kardashian wants her ashes to be scattered in the sea after her death. As if there wasn’t enough plastic there already.

Shared recently on Threads:

“You’re so understanding,” yeah, because I don’t want to go to prison for the rest of my life.

Just shared via WeChat:

I wasn’t planning on moving, but I was just invited to the neighborhood fall potluck, so I guess now I have no choice.

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