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10,000+ funny quotes

Activity Log ✨

Someone from 🇲🇬 has bookmarked:

I avoid drama by being unpopular.

Someone from 🇧🇦 has copied:

If nothing lasts forever, will you be my nothing?

Someone from 🇲🇾 has shared:

We all got a little Barbie in us (the microplastics).

Someone from 🇵🇰 has viewed:

I always preferred the English spelling of “diarrhea” which is “diarrhoea” because it really looks like you’ve lost control of your vowels.

Someone from 🇲🇨 has downloaded:

Sorry, can’t. Calling NASA and making alien noises.

Someone from 🇵🇹 has shared:

Not wearing glasses anymore, I’ve seen enough.

Someone from 🇲🇿 has copied:

When I tell a joke that doesn’t land, I follow up with a worse one to make my audience realize how good they had it with the first joke.

Someone from 🇱🇺 has bookmarked:

If I could have immunity to anything I would pick calories.

Someone from 🇼🇸 has downloaded:

Women know the exact weight of their children and their age in days. Men just know that little people live with them.

Someone from 🇰🇭 has viewed:

I don’t see why walking is healthy. Zombies walk constantly and they look awful.

Funny Quotes Data 🤓

New Funny Quotes

769 added this month

Funny Quotes Total

10,931

Funny Quotes Topics

13,902

Funny Quotes Images

10,931

Updated

26 minutes ago

Users Online

3,435

Social Media Log 💫

Spotted on Reddit:

I’m in a comfy dress today, but I look like a potato in floral. Call me Nelly Flortato.

Breaking via TikTok:

The reward for doing really good work is more work.

Trending via X:

Almost all of my bad decisions are food-related.

Freshly posted on Pinterest:

Beavers are so funny. Why are you a little rat doing hydraulic engineering?

Trending via Discord:

If it walks like a duck and talks like a duck, you’re drunk. Ducks don’t talk.

Seen just now on LinkedIn:

A police lineup, but you have to recognize your dad’s sneeze.

Just landed via Instagram:

I always say “it’s so expensive” and then buy it nonetheless.

Going viral on Snapchat:

As long as you don’t ever give them your real name, they can’t accuse you of not keeping the mystery alive in your relationship.

Shared recently on Reddit:

Gosh, being a princess is exhausting.

Freshly posted on X:

Signed an Executive Order that you have to give me a little forehead kiss.

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Funny Flintstones quotes

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Welcome to Wordgag! 😉✌️ Enjoy endless laughter with our collection of funny quotes guaranteed to crack you up. 😂💥

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Trending Topics 📁

activity communication day food frustration fun humor i irony joke just know life love me media need people procrastination relationship sarcasm social someone technology time want work

Funny Quotes Data 🤓

New Funny Quotes

769 added this month

Funny Quotes Total

10,931

Funny Quotes Topics

13,902

Funny Quotes Images

10,931

Updated

26 minutes ago

Users Online

3,429

Funny Quotes of the Month 🚀

Funny Quotes of the Year ⭐

Activity Log ✨

Someone from 🇨🇭 has viewed:

Don’t ask me for work advice, I’m just going to tell you to quit your job.

Someone from 🇰🇭 has viewed:

I didn’t just turn into a grouchy old woman overnight. It took years of people letting me down, pissing me off, and dealing with idiots to get this good at it.

Someone from 🇱🇨 has copied:

They should invent friends whose schedules line up with yours.

Someone from 🇮🇳 has copied:

Google Maps should start screaming the more wrong turns you make.

Someone from 🇹🇷 has shared:

Whoever coined the term coined the term coined the term coined the term.

Someone from 🇷🇼 has downloaded:

The fact that I have a lot of wine in the house proves that I don’t drink much. Otherwise the wine would be gone.

Someone from 🇼🇸 has shared:

I’m not good with plants or people, but I am good with books and buffets.

Someone from 🇪🇨 has bookmarked:

Hey bro, please stop using all the good skipping rocks at the river.

Someone from 🇰🇿 has bookmarked:

Perfume is designed to be an invisible accessory. It’s not designed to instantly kill the canary when you entered the room.

Someone from 🇷🇸 has downloaded:

I couldn’t work at a zoo. I’d have a penguin in my car by the end of the shift.

Social Media Log 💫

Trending via Facebook:

You guys can continue with the week, I’ve stopped here.

Reported on Messenger:

Turning to the person next to me and saying “thanks for nothing” as I get off the train.

Seen just now on TikTok:

I googled my symptoms and it turns out I just need this election to be over.

Broadcasted on X:

“Careful. It’s slippery!” – Everyone, after you’ve already slipped.

Spotted on Instagram:

Who called it a shopaholic and not a boughtanist?

Trending via TikTok:

Everyone hates math until their paycheck looks funny, then all of a sudden you know trigonometry.

Trending via WhatsApp:

A clever man fills his wife’s closet with so many clothes that no other man can fit in.

Making waves on Discord:

Of course women need more pockets, where are we supposed to hold all of our grudges?

Going viral on YouTube:

“Beauty sleep” is bullshit. I sleep 14 hours a day and still look like trash.

Just shared via Discord:

You should just baseline mistrust every single politician at every level until they prove themselves worthy of liking.

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