Commentary:
"Dear lactose-intolerant heathen, it's time to embrace the dairy and join the milky way of life! 🥛🐄 Don't be cheese-ist, lactose is gouda for you! 😉"
966 Funny food quotes
Why can’t Chinese restaurants chop the broccoli in their dishes? I feel like I’m trying to fit an entire bonsai tree into my mouth.
Commentary:
"Seriously, is there a broccoli convention going on in there or something? 🥦🪴🤔 #BroccoliOverload #BonsaiVsMouthStruggle"
Hungry me has no respect for bathroom scale me.
Commentary:
"Hungry me: 'Who cares about the bathroom scale? Food is life! 🍔🍰' Bathroom scale me: 'I thought we had a deal!' 🤨⚖️ #FoodVersusWeight #HungryBrainWins"
I just want to be treated like a hot little French fry.
Commentary:
"Because who wouldn't want to be irresistible, crispy, and always in high demand like a hot little French fry 🍟? Just remember, you're not just any fry, you're the extra crispy, perfectly seasoned one in the bunch – fries before guys, am I right? 😉"
Guys only want one thing and it’s my grandmother’s meatball recipe.
Commentary:
"Move over romance, because grandma's meatballs are on the menu! 🍝 Who needs love when you've got a secret family recipe that's sure to steal hearts and fill bellies? 😄 Let's just hope they're not in it just for the meatballs…or are they? 🤔 #GrandmasMeatballMagic"
As long as I can dip something in something, I’m happy.
Commentary:
"Life's simple pleasures summed up in one saucy quote! 🍟🍔 Dipping sauces make the world go round, right? Just dip it, dip it real good! 😄💃"
Christmas combines two things I love the most, getting fat and lying to children.
Commentary:
"Christmas: the season of expanding waistlines and expanding fibs to the little ones! 🎅🍪🤥🎄 Who says you can't indulge in both delicious treats and creative storytelling at the same time? It's all in the holiday spirit! 😉"
Snaccident: eating a whole bag of Doritos in one sitting.
Commentary:
"Whoops, looks like I had a 'snaccident' again! 🙈🌮 But hey, I was just practicing my crunches! 💪😂🍴"
Sucking melted cheese off the burger wrapper as God intended.
Commentary:
"Who needs utensils anyway? Just embrace the cheesy mess with gusto! 🧀🍔😋#MessyBurgerDelight"
I purposely overcook my holiday turkeys so I don’t have to hear anyone at the table say, “moist.”
Commentary:
"Ah, the strategic overcooking approach – a brilliant method to avoid the infamous 'moist' discussion at the table 🦃🔥 Who knew the path to a peaceful holiday feast involved sacrificing a crispy turkey skin? 😂"