Wordgag ツ

10,000+ funny quotes

Activity Log ✨

Someone from 🇨🇲 has downloaded:

If you want to complain about my driving at least calm down and get off my hood first.

Someone from 🇴🇲 has viewed:

I listen to a lot of white noise, so I get really excited when it rains or someone turns on a fan. It’s like seeing my favorite band live.

Someone from 🇲🇨 has copied:

The older I get, the more I love my morning coffee and no one speaking to me.

Someone from 🇧🇿 has copied:

I travel like I’m rich, then eat like I’m broke.

Someone from 🇲🇦 has shared:

At least I’m part of the generation that at 30 still looks like it’s in its early 20s.

Someone from 🇧🇴 has viewed:

I think my new neighbors are creeps. They seem to be looking into my window every time I’m looking out my window to see what they are doing.

Someone from 🇧🇮 has copied:

Bag of flesh that acts weird when another bag of flesh doesn’t send symbols on glowing screen.

Someone from 🇨🇷 has downloaded:

I can’t wait to go to bed, get terrible sleep, and wake up exhausted with a sore back.

Someone from 🇨🇲 has shared:

My superpower is to wake up more tired than I was when I fell asleep.

Someone from 🇿🇲 has copied:

Stop avoiding your banking app. Go look at what you’ve done.

Funny Quotes Data 🤓

New Funny Quotes

105 this month

Funny Quotes Total

15,374

Funny Quotes Topics

17,485

Funny Quotes Images

15,374

Updated

Jan 2, 2026

Users Online

3,705

Social Media Log 💫

Live now on X:

A good audiobook will have you inventing chores to do.

Seen just now on Instagram:

Hit the vape till it tastes like technology.

Going viral on YouTube:

Imagine the sound a centipede would make if they wore tiny flip flops.

Going viral on X:

The gap in my resume is because I was trying to reach enlightenment for 5 years.

Trending via Threads:

My phone and it’s charger are in a situationship and sometimes it works and sometimes it doesn’t.

Making waves on Snapchat:

Men call us “gold diggers” when we expect them to pay for a meal. Honey, a gold digger goes after yachts, not a piece of chicken.

Making waves on Messenger:

The ‘E’ in my name stands for ‘Everything you need.’

Spotted on WeChat:

I eat cake because it’s somebody’s birthday somewhere.

Just landed via LinkedIn:

Good morning to everyone — except me, because I clearly didn’t get enough sleep.

Just shared via WeChat:

Sorry if my posts have any typos, it’s because I’m driving.

Funny glow stick quotes

Funny glow stick quotes light up the night with laughs and good vibes 🌟😂 Whether you’re at a festival, party, or just glowing up your mood, these witty one-liners bring extra sparkle ✨🎉 Ready to shine bright and giggle hard? Let the glow stick fun begin! 💡😄

New funny glow stick quotes 👇

All funny glow stick quotes & images can be used for free for non-commercial purposes 👌

New Funny Quotes
🎲 Random Funny Quotes

Welcome to Wordgag! 😉✌️ Enjoy endless laughter with our collection of funny quotes guaranteed to crack you up. 😂💥

Social Media Stars ⭐

16 shares on Twitch this month:

I noticed my mouse problem is back an I yelled at my cats for being lazy and not doing their job, like I was in a Tom and Jerry cartoon.

44 shares on Reddit this month:

Don’t ask me ‘how are you?’ unless you’re willing to sign an NDA.

51 shares on LinkedIn this month:

I think you would all treat me a lot better if I possessed a small amount of plutonium.

63 shares on X this month:

Why didn’t Scooby Doo smell that the ghosts were human?

33 shares on Discord this month:

Sparkling water tastes like that feeling when your foot falls asleep.

29 shares on Pinterest this month:

Me and my best friend saying, “Hey, who are we to judge,” after spending 6 hours gossiping.

93 shares on TikTok this month:

I’ve broken all my New Year’s Resolutions so now I’m moving on to laws of nature.

97 shares on WeChat this month:

Ginger ale is the champagne of soda.

98 shares on WhatsApp this month:

Waffles are just pancakes with abs.

24 shares on Discord this month:

There is no reason to be a people pleaser. People are never pleased.

Trending Topics 📁

activity communication day food frustration fun humor i irony joke just know life love me media people procrastination relationship sarcasm social social media someone technology time want work

Hot Jokes 💥

7 folks are currently checking 👀

I downloaded a meditation app. Now I’m stressed about missing sessions.

19 folks are currently checking 👀

I can’t wait until my kids have a place of their own so I can come barging through their door and say “what’s for dinner? I don’t like that. Can you give me money for McDonald’s?”

13 folks are currently checking 👀

Unfortunately, free coffee in the office will never hit like a $9 iced latte will.

17 folks are currently checking 👀

Super quick question: does anyone know what the point is?

9 folks are currently checking 👀

I like work; it fascinates me. I can sit and look at it for hours.

12 folks are currently checking 👀

At least men and women can agree on one thing: it feels amazing to take a bra off.

14 folks are currently checking 👀

“She’s so self-centered”—who’s supposed to be the center of my life? You?

24 folks are currently checking 👀

Geometry is a scam. What do you mean “prove it’s a triangle”? Just look at it.

10 folks are currently checking 👀

I’m so unpopular at school they call me “Batteries”. I’m never included in anything.

19 folks are currently checking 👀

Lazy is such an ugly word. I prefer to call it selective participation.

Funny Quotes Data 🤓

New Funny Quotes

105 this month

Funny Quotes Total

15,374

Funny Quotes Topics

17,485

Funny Quotes Images

15,374

Updated

Jan 2, 2026

Users Online

3,594

Activity Log ✨

Someone from 🇨🇫 has downloaded:

Apparently there is a bird fight club who holds their meetings outside my window at about 5am.

Someone from 🇦🇹 has downloaded:

For the record, I use a turntable.

Someone from 🇱🇮 has copied:

In my opinion, those who go jogging on a Sunday morning certainly don’t have a comfortable sofa.

Someone from 🇺🇾 has downloaded:

Every cat is a little celebrity to me.

Someone from 🇧🇳 has viewed:

My wife has the worst taste in men.

Someone from 🇨🇿 has copied:

I love when men go on diets they will be like “let me go for the healthy option”: the buffalo chicken quesadilla.

Someone from 🇲🇾 has bookmarked:

The sexual tension between me and a late afternoon coffee to get me through the workday.

Someone from 🇵🇱 has shared:

I like to live life dangerously by occasionally sticking my foot out over the edge of the bed at night.

Someone from 🇱🇺 has copied:

I won’t be accepting any parcels for the neighbors in December this year. Last year it was all junk.

Someone from 🇦🇺 has copied:

Bro, are you a black hole, because you suck energy and light?

Social Media Log 💫

Shared recently on Pinterest:

I don’t even get disappointed anymore. I’m just like, “Oh, again? Okay.”

Spreading quickly via TikTok:

Probably the worst thing about the death of print media is the devastating effect it’s having on the producers of traditional ransom notes.

Just shared via Discord:

My dating checklist is down to “not the Unabomber”.

Just landed via Messenger:

Sorry to any bands who see me yawn during their show. It’s not you, it’s just past 10pm.

Just landed via Messenger:

A good audiobook will have you inventing chores to do.

Spotted on Instagram:

An eye exam where the optometrist makes you read a menu under dim lights.

Going viral on Telegram:

I’ve already sent Santa a short letter this week to say hello. Not that he thinks I only get in touch if I want something.

Spreading quickly via Facebook:

People used to fly kites. Glad that’s over with.

Spotted on Facebook:

There should be an Olympics where athletes can take as many drugs as they want. Like, to hell with y’all, let’s see how high humans can really jump.

Making waves on Twitch:

You lose some, you lose some more.

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