Wordgag ツ

10,000+ funny quotes

Activity Log ✨

Someone from 🇮🇷 has downloaded:

My mayor is Muslim, my bagels are Jewish, my Dior is Christian.

Someone from 🇵🇾 has bookmarked:

Do y’all watch the results come or do you go to bed and wait to see what Democracy Claus left you in the morning?

Someone from 🇰🇳 has viewed:

Need to become a tour guide. I’ve just realized it’s the only job I can think of that combines my loves of walking around and knowing more than everyone around me.

Someone from 🇦🇿 has copied:

Stretching my back isn’t enough; I need to take out my spine and wring it out like a towel.

Someone from 🇵🇭 has shared:

Turns out, sitting on the porch, feeding birds and squirrels, is a pretty good treatment for depression.

Someone from 🇧🇴 has shared:

Someone asked me what my hobby was and I realized that my favorite hobby is doing absolutely nothing.

Someone from 🇧🇯 has shared:

Texas Chain Saw Massacre is full of plot holes. What happens to the victims when they die? Is there an afterlife?

Someone from 🇻🇪 has bookmarked:

It’s funny how our brains remember that we have forgotten something, but not what we have forgotten.

Someone from 🇾🇪 has bookmarked:

And to my children I leave my collection of tote bags and gift bags.

Someone from 🇧🇹 has viewed:

If you want to sell something to a woman, show her other women using it. If you want to sell something to a man, prove to him no other man has it.

Funny Quotes Data 🤓

New Funny Quotes

calculating…

Funny Quotes Total

15,753

Funny Quotes Topics

17,766

Funny Quotes Images

15,753

Updated

Feb 3, 2026

Users Online

3,545

Social Media Log 💫

Breaking via Slack:

Toddlers: I’ve licked everything so everything is mine now.

Spreading quickly via Reddit:

The thumbs up emoji is a nice way to tell someone not only did you receive their message, you’re also done with the conversation.

Going viral on WhatsApp:

Doctors don’t really need to hit you with that rubber hammer, it’s just how they release a lil tension through the day.

Trending via Telegram:

Ah, summer. When my non-consensual relationship with mosquitoes begins.

Shared recently on Telegram:

There is too much happening for mid-December. Where are the canceled meetings? Why are we not circling back next year?

Trending via Snapchat:

People who live alone should get one practice conversation before they have to speak out loud for the first time that day.

Trending via Discord:

They should make a biopic of just some random guy.

Just shared via YouTube:

Now I understand why old people sit outside just to sit outside.

Just shared via TikTok:

I love being wrong, it’s just like being right except easier and I get to be stupid, which is my favorite thing.

Freshly posted on Twitch:

Bad news. Right now is as young as you’re going to be.

Funny holder quotes

Funny holder quotes bring a burst of laughter 😄 to everyday objects, turning the ordinary into something unforgettable! Whether it’s for your phone, keys, or even snacks 🍿, these witty sayings add a splash of personality and humor 🎉. Ready to brighten up your space and mood? Let’s dive into the funniest, quirkiest lines that make holders way more entertaining! 😂✨

New funny holder quotes 👇

All funny holder quotes & images can be used for free for non-commercial purposes 👌

Funny Quotes Collections
✨ New Funny Quotes

Social Media Stars ⭐

34 shares on YouTube this month:

Netflix be like “we know exactly what movie you talkin’ ’bout but we ain’t got it lol”.

58 shares on LinkedIn this month:

I need a massage for my brain.

80 shares on Threads this month:

“Male loneliness epidemic” and it’s just karma and the consequences of their actions.

17 shares on Reddit this month:

God sends you an only child as a friend to test you.

90 shares on Messenger this month:

Yesterday I really wanted tacos and now I’m eating tacos. Follow your dreams!

96 shares on Snapchat this month:

I was neglecting my root chakra at the time, your honor.

43 shares on TikTok this month:

I don’t know how to mop my kitchen floor without pretending l’m cleaning up a gruesome crime scene.

91 shares on WeChat this month:

I tried yoga once. I pulled a hamstring and my dignity.

93 shares on Facebook this month:

I call my period Shark week. I want to eat everything, I’m snapping at people, I feel huge, people are scared of me, and there is blood everywhere.

39 shares on Discord this month:

That fight could’ve been an email.

Trending Topics 📁

activity communication day food frustration fun humor i irony joke just know life love me media people procrastination relationship sarcasm social social media someone technology time want work

Hot Jokes 💥

16 folks are currently checking 👀

Self-care is smoking a solo blunt with music.

14 folks are currently checking 👀

I don’t believe the phrase “if they wanted to, they would,” because I want to, and I don’t.

20 folks are currently checking 👀

Hey, if the Earth could stop air frying me, that’d be great.

15 folks are currently checking 👀

When a documentary starts with an old person going, ‘We’re a small town, we didn’t lock our doors at night,’ oh, we’re gonna find out what made them start.

19 folks are currently checking 👀

You’re the human embodiment of an “ugh.”

17 folks are currently checking 👀

One downside of marrying a doctor is you have to give up eating apples.

22 folks are currently checking 👀

For those who don’t want Alexa listening in on your conversations, they’re making a male version that doesn’t listen to anything.

17 folks are currently checking 👀

Whatever y’all heard about me, I’m way worse.

10 folks are currently checking 👀

There should be a socially acceptable way to say, “I’m not sure what to say to that. Can you please say something different?”.

22 folks are currently checking 👀

All I care about is being financially stable and getting sexier.

Funny Quotes Data 🤓

New Funny Quotes

calculating…

Funny Quotes Total

15,753

Funny Quotes Topics

17,766

Funny Quotes Images

15,753

Updated

Feb 3, 2026

Users Online

3,740

Activity Log ✨

Someone from 🇲🇼 has viewed:

If you break up with the same person enough times, you eventually get married. Never give up.

Someone from 🇨🇻 has viewed:

Not to brag, but what a time to be childless.

Someone from 🇱🇻 has viewed:

My friend’s kid asked me if I had any games on phone so I let her text my ex.

Someone from 🇩🇪 has downloaded:

Imagine if spiders giggled when they ran away from us.

Someone from 🇵🇾 has shared:

I don’t want to alarm anyone, but my doctor says I have an irreversible terminal condition called aging.

Someone from 🇸🇪 has viewed:

Anime characters are always like “But you didn’t know about my eye,” and then they activate their mode.

Someone from 🇧🇫 has viewed:

Doctors don’t really need to hit you with that rubber hammer, it’s just how they release a lil tension through the day.

Someone from 🇧🇾 has downloaded:

You did all that terrible driving just to end up right next to me at the stop light.

Someone from 🇳🇴 has viewed:

As a childless adult, it is my duty to embrace hobbies and pastimes that my peers cannot, as they have sacrificed their free time to maintain the population. I must vibe and chill, and do fun things, in their honor.

Someone from 🇳🇮 has shared:

Judging by the hair on my couch, I’m surprised I have any cat left at all.

Social Media Log 💫

Spotted on Threads:

I used to sell furniture for a living. The trouble was, it was my own.

Going bananas on Twitch:

Hey girl, are you a cigarette? Because I like cigarettes.

Spotted on Reddit:

Whoever thinks money doesn’t buy happiness can deposit it in my bank account.

Seen just now on Pinterest:

Is it possible to die of horniness? Asking for a friend.

Broadcasted on Instagram:

Netflix subtitles be like “speaking foreign language”. Bro, translate it!

Seen just now on Twitch:

Worst part of a corporate job is no tips. Someone should slip you a $20 if you write a killer email.

Spotted on X:

Due to unforeseen circumstances, I will be acting weird today.

Trending via Snapchat:

Cheating on a partner should affect your credit score.

Seen just now on WhatsApp:

Me to HR: Okay, but you have to admit that was funny.

Going bananas on Snapchat:

“Santa isn’t real!” Okay, I literally just saw him at the mall.

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