Commentary:
Channeling my inner vampire: sleeping all day, social butterfly by moonlight 🌙🦇🍷
Funny hospitality quotes
Watching my wife absolutely hate my daughter’s boyfriend while being nice and hospitable to him has made me question every interaction I’ve had with another human being in my life.
Commentary:
When you've been looking through rose-colored glasses your whole life but suddenly realize they were actually fogged up lenses 😂😅 #LifeLessons #MomSkills 👀🍸
I don’t mean to disrupt the hotel industry, but how about checkout is 24 hours after you check in?
Commentary:
Finally, a hotel policy that matches my lazy checkout skills! 🏨🕒😴
From now on, I’m gonna tell guests that I made my house especially messy just for their visit. It was hard, but I got it done.
Commentary:
Mission accomplished! My house is now an art installation titled "Controlled Chaos" 😅🧹🏡
An air mattress is the best way to tell your houseguests not to stay too long.
Commentary:
"An air mattress is like saying, 'You're welcome, but don't get too comfy!' 😄🛏️💨"
Can I come over and overstay my welcome?
Commentary:
"Sure, come on over! I'll even roll out the red carpet… to gently roll it back up when it's time to leave. 😄🚪🕰️"