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10,000+ funny quotes

Activity Log ✨

Someone from 🇷🇼 has shared:

Every girl’s personal hell is being too excited about their birthday and it ends up being the worst day ever.

Someone from 🇦🇸 has copied:

Whenever an insect rides for miles on my car, I imagine it thinking: “Oh crap, moving again!”

Someone from 🇵🇪 has viewed:

If all men are the same, why does it take women so long to choose one?

Someone from 🇨🇷 has shared:

Don’t forget to be mean to strangers on the internet today, for no reason whatsoever.

Someone from 🇧🇷 has copied:

So many songs that tell you to throw your hands in the air like you just don’t care, so few about the hazards of ceiling fans.

Someone from 🇮🇸 has shared:

If my wife doesn’t win anything on this $2 scratch ticket, it’s going to go down as one of the worst birthday presents ever.

Someone from 🇨🇭 has shared:

Kinda worried about something. Don’t know what it is yet.

Someone from 🇨🇻 has copied:

The oceans are rising because no one is drinking their recommended 8-12 glasses of water per day.

Someone from 🇺🇾 has copied:

Have kids so you can say things you never thought you would like “please don’t vacuum your sister”

Someone from 🇦🇲 has bookmarked:

To the people who have only fans, what’s stopping you from upgrading to an air conditioner?

Funny Quotes Data 🤓

New Funny Quotes

calculating…

Funny Quotes Total

15,753

Funny Quotes Topics

17,766

Funny Quotes Images

15,753

Updated

Feb 3, 2026

Users Online

3,686

Social Media Log 💫

Making waves on Telegram:

I’m not a 10. I’m more like two 5s held together by cheese and chocolate.

Going bananas on Slack:

Cleaned the bathroom window. Wasn’t frosted glass at all.

Going bananas on TikTok:

I miss phone booths. We used to train our immune system in those things.

Live now on Facebook:

Accept who you are. Unless you’re a serial killer.

Seen just now on TikTok:

Odd—my boss told me to meet him at the abandoned quarry at midnight for my performance evaluation.

Making waves on Facebook:

I haven’t exaggerated in like a million years.

Going viral on Pinterest:

Tomorrow isn’t promised, we need to kiss today.

Trending via Twitch:

I’m forced to conclude that not liking my posts is a you problem.

Broadcasted on X:

I love ketchup from my head to-ma-toes.

Seen just now on WeChat:

Honestly, shopping beats therapy, anytime. It costs the same and you get a dress out of it.

Funny hot single quotes

Funny hot single quotes 🔥💃 are perfect for spicing up your social feed and embracing the single life with a wink 😜. Whether you’re owning your independence or just having fun, these clever lines add humor and sass to your vibe 😎✨. Ready to laugh and celebrate being single in style? Let’s dive into some witty gems that’ll keep you smiling all day long! 😂💥

New funny hot single quotes 👇

All funny hot single quotes & images can be used for free for non-commercial purposes 👌

Funny Quotes Collections
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Social Media Stars ⭐

21 shares on WeChat this month:

The adjective for metal is metallic, but not so for iron, which is ironic.

31 shares on Twitch this month:

Men invented pool tables so they could watch each other bend over.

98 shares on Pinterest this month:

My friends have canceled our dinner plans two nights in a row. I’m starting to think they don’t like dinner.

77 shares on Threads this month:

Whoever said diamonds are a girl’s best friend clearly has never met shredded cheese.

54 shares on Threads this month:

I’m tired of commercials trying to be funny. Scare me into buying something. I want to be terrified of buying the wrong toothpaste.

87 shares on Threads this month:

My favorite thing to do at the gym is stay home and eat a piece of cake.

78 shares on Slack this month:

Your Majesty” would be the best name for a cat.

11 shares on Telegram this month:

I’m exactly where I want to be. At home, avoiding people.

17 shares on Pinterest this month:

I birthed my kid faster than she can put on shoes.

30 shares on LinkedIn this month:

My swear jar is filing for an IPO soon.

Trending Topics 📁

activity communication day food frustration fun humor i irony joke just know life love me media people procrastination relationship sarcasm social social media someone technology time want work

Hot Jokes 💥

25 folks are currently checking 👀

Me, in heaven: Can you take a photo of me sitting on that cloud?

22 folks are currently checking 👀

This summer went by so fast, I didn’t even get a chance to lose any weight.

19 folks are currently checking 👀

Don’t throw hate at me, throw money!

9 folks are currently checking 👀

Channeling my inner pretzel to achieve expert-level bad posture.

16 folks are currently checking 👀

UK rappers be like “I’ve got a posh flat and my bird is very comely, I own more motors than the marchioness of cholmondeley”

9 folks are currently checking 👀

Very confusing that gross pay is before tax. I always find the number way grosser after tax.

24 folks are currently checking 👀

Before you laugh at kids who believe in Santa, remember there are grown men who believe that Cristiano Ronaldo is a better footballer than Lionel Messi.

23 folks are currently checking 👀

One pretty important part of being a dad is walking faster than the rest of your family through an airport.

23 folks are currently checking 👀

Life is not a fairy tale. If you lose your shoe at midnight, you’re drunk.

16 folks are currently checking 👀

Coffee is better when you have no work.

Funny Quotes Data 🤓

New Funny Quotes

calculating…

Funny Quotes Total

15,753

Funny Quotes Topics

17,766

Funny Quotes Images

15,753

Updated

Feb 3, 2026

Users Online

3,758

Activity Log ✨

Someone from 🇱🇻 has copied:

You should always wash your sheets once a week in case they are really ghosts and need a shower.

Someone from 🇺🇿 has viewed:

The lioness does not concern herself with the pile of clothes she moves between bed and chair every day.

Someone from 🇧🇿 has copied:

Shut up brain, I wasn’t even talking to me.

Someone from 🇧🇫 has bookmarked:

Terrifying if true: Her eyes lighting up a room.

Someone from 🇰🇼 has copied:

Elevator rides in real life: 30 seconds long. Elevator rides in movies: Two minutes long.

Someone from 🇳🇿 has downloaded:

Elect a clown, expect a circus.

Someone from 🇯🇵 has shared:

Why does the dentist have to take an x-ray of my teeth? They right there, bro!

Someone from 🇲🇳 has downloaded:

Taking my heart off my sleeve, I fold it up neatly and carefully place it back inside my chest.

Someone from 🇧🇬 has downloaded:

I’d imagine the sound of clowns having sex would just be a cacophony of bicycle horns.

Someone from 🇬🇲 has shared:

Unlike the brain, the stomach alerts you when it’s empty.

Social Media Log 💫

Trending via Instagram:

I have the patience of a nearly ripe avocado.

Just shared via Reddit:

The days will soon be shorter again. Then it won’t rain for so long.

Spreading quickly via Instagram:

When people give me directions and they’re like “you can’t miss it,” I’m like, “Oh, you do not know what I’m capable of.”

Trending via YouTube:

“I’ve never done parkour, but I have chased a toddler with an open Sharpie through the house.”

Making waves on YouTube:

I hope none of the people I vowed to “help hide a body” ever actually need my help.

Spreading quickly via WeChat:

So. Fed the laundry and washed the cat. Showered the garbage and disposed of myself. Was there anything else?

Going bananas on Instagram:

I love my bed so much, what a place.

Going viral on Reddit:

My two moods are eating a breakfast sandwich or wishing I was eating a breakfast sandwich.

Freshly posted on Instagram:

Men are like dogs. They’re actually cute, but having my own would be too much work for me.

Shared recently on Twitch:

My new coffee table book, “Accidental Screenshots,” is available for pre-order now.

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