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10,000+ funny quotes

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Someone from 🇦🇸 has downloaded:

Think about how many more lovers you’d have if a cross country high-speed rail existed. That’s what they are taking away from you.

Someone from 🇩🇲 has copied:

When I watch hockey, I pretend they’re fighting over the last Oreo.

Someone from 🇬🇩 has viewed:

Fishing for compliments like “I’m a mess in this photo that I took all morning to get the right angle and filter and after 50 selfies this is me”.

Someone from 🇦🇿 has viewed:

I wonder what the other me’s are up to in other dimensions.

Someone from 🇮🇪 has shared:

It whistles, doesn’t it? Your head when it’s windy.

Someone from 🇧🇼 has shared:

I just shaved my legs and man, the next 7 minutes and 34 seconds before it starts growing back is gonna feel amazing.

Someone from 🇷🇼 has copied:

The sweet spot is just enough pain to know you’re alive, but not quite enough to wish you were dead.

Someone from 🇭🇺 has copied:

Yeah, I’ll get up soon, I just need to look at the internet first. Yes, the whole thing.

Someone from 🇲🇼 has downloaded:

I’m so old I remember when a hashtag was called a pound sign, and we played tic-tac-toe on top of it.

Someone from 🇹🇷 has viewed:

It’s funny how people without pizzas in their hands actually think I’ll answer my door.

Funny Quotes Data 🤓

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Funny Quotes Total

15,753

Funny Quotes Topics

17,766

Funny Quotes Images

15,753

Updated

Feb 3, 2026

Users Online

3,308

Social Media Log 💫

Freshly posted on Reddit:

I’m already ready to clock out from work tomorrow.

Spotted on WeChat:

Don’t let the British accent fool you. I’m not saying anything smart.

Going bananas on WhatsApp:

I wasn’t feeling well so I googled my symptoms. I either have allergies or I died two days ago.

Going viral on X:

I will charge a 25% tariff on my steely gaze.

Freshly posted on X:

Spices were first brought to Western Europe in the Middle Ages. Some of them are still at the back of my cupboard.

Shared recently on WeChat:

Asking the waiter for her phone number and then texting her “can I have more coffee?” two minutes later.

Breaking via Instagram:

“You should exercise for at least 30 minutes every day”. Okay, and how much if you’re not trying to go to the Olympics?

Going viral on Snapchat:

Putting your wedding scrapbook in the little free library is an unprecedented level of divorced.

Going bananas on Pinterest:

According to the web, caffeine deficiency is a life threatening condition for people around you.

Seen just now on Twitch:

Foot fetish should just be called feetish.

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New funny it’s quotes 👇

Due to personal reasons, I won’t be dropping it like it’s hot anymore.

2 weeks ago

activity, break, decision, drop, drop it like it’s hot, dropping, due, hot, humor, i, it’s, personal, personal reason, reason, reasons, reference, song, song reference

All funny it’s quotes & images can be used for free for non-commercial purposes 👌

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Social Media Stars ⭐

94 shares on TikTok this month:

Relationship status: I love my bed.

47 shares on YouTube this month:

Babies will literally step on your face just to grab what they want.

86 shares on Facebook this month:

Teens be like, “This is the worst day of my life,” and it’s just that they were told to unload the dishwasher.

68 shares on Reddit this month:

It’s just a matter of time until they add “syndrome” after my name.

88 shares on X this month:

Chickens only make one sound, because they can’t think outside the bawks.

27 shares on YouTube this month:

Home is where the tap water doesn’t taste funny.

79 shares on Twitch this month:

Puberty was a hair-raising experience.

91 shares on LinkedIn this month:

Imagine being hungry and some guy tries to teach you to fish.

61 shares on Instagram this month:

Third wheeling with two girls who are best friends is so much worse than third wheeling a couple.

15 shares on Messenger this month:

Twitter is the black sheep of the web, always in the corner, loudly arguing with itself.

Activity Log ✨

Someone from 🇸🇾 has viewed:

Chill, folks, it’s just a simulation.

Someone from 🇦🇲 has downloaded:

It’s time for basic human empathy to make a comeback.

Someone from 🇲🇾 has downloaded:

I want a pet eagle that’s trained to steal people’s sandwiches for me.

Someone from 🇳🇦 has downloaded:

Good morning, townsfolk. I’m here to slay the monsters.

Someone from 🇧🇪 has copied:

Spice up your anxiety attack by playing the Jaws theme song.

Someone from 🇨🇦 has shared:

Remember the good old days when you didn’t have to wonder if the person messaging you was a bot or not?

Someone from 🇮🇶 has viewed:

The secret to a good marriage is that it’s all about give and take. Giving each other frequent back rubs and ordering lots of takeout.

Someone from 🇲🇩 has bookmarked:

The lion doesn’t concern himself with credit card debt.

Someone from 🇦🇩 has viewed:

My neighbors listen to really good music, whether they like it or not.

Someone from 🇸🇧 has bookmarked:

Asking a film guy, “Who is that?” when Tom Cruise comes on screen just to feel something.

Social Media Log 💫

Spotted on Reddit:

Fun fact: The US was originally not meant to be a reality TV show.

Freshly posted on Messenger:

Going out with 38% battery and no boyfriend.

Spotted on Slack:

The most dangerous part of your 50s is those first few steps after prolonged sitting.

Going bananas on Snapchat:

“Pre” means before, and “post” means after. Using both at the same time would be preposterous.

Going viral on YouTube:

The children seemed disappointed when I told them the best part about being an adult is going to bed early.

Just shared via YouTube:

Twitter is for people who tried suffering in silence and realized it wasn’t for them.

Seen just now on WeChat:

Shout out to all the experts on the web who know everything there is to know about absolutely everything.

Seen just now on TikTok:

My morning routine includes 10 minutes of sitting on my bed and thinking about how tired I am.

Spotted on TikTok:

My Saturday was going really well, until I realized it’s Sunday!

Making waves on Slack:

I hate it when my body decides to get sick. I gave you a vegetable last week, how dare you.

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New funny it’s quotes 👇

Due to personal reasons, I won’t be dropping it like it’s hot anymore.

All funny it’s quotes & images can be used for free for non-commercial purposes 👌

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