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10,000+ funny quotes

Activity Log ✨

Someone from 🇬🇦 has copied:

No time like now to start “flossing regularly” before tomorrow’s dental appointment.

Someone from 🇲🇰 has shared:

Socks try to be monogamous, but most end up either single or having multiple different partners.

Someone from 🇸🇻 has copied:

I made you something special for Mother’s Day, my kid threatened.

Someone from 🇬🇷 has bookmarked:

Unless you fell off the treadmill, no one wants to hear about your workout.

Someone from 🇭🇹 has downloaded:

I can’t believe someone ran over my neighbors loud motorcycle tomorrow morning.

Someone from 🇪🇷 has shared:

I’m surprised some of you are allowed out of your house on your own.

Someone from 🇹🇯 has viewed:

I will unfriend, uncousin, unco-worker, unfollow, unfamily any draining soul real quick.

Someone from 🇱🇾 has bookmarked:

I’ve found God. It’s my turn to hide now.

Someone from 🇰🇳 has bookmarked:

Whatever the plot is in Barbie’s movie, my dolls have been through worse.

Someone from 🇸🇨 has bookmarked:

Actually, it’s illegal to be upset if you make a date on Halloween and they ghost you.

Funny Quotes Data 🤓

New Funny Quotes

1834 added this month

Funny Quotes Total

11,996

Funny Quotes Topics

14,796

Funny Quotes Images

11,996

Updated

1 minute ago

Users Online

3,426

Social Media Log 💫

Seen just now on Instagram:

The hairdresser asking me what special plans I have for the day like this wasn’t it.

Trending via Discord:

This Monday could have been an email.

Reported on Slack:

Men shouldn’t be allowed to download any app other than Wikipedia.

Shared recently on Snapchat:

I’m trying to shower you with affection. It doesn’t matter how I got into your bathroom.

Reported on Slack:

Absolutely love wanting to do a lot of things and ending up not doing even one! Yay.

Just shared via WhatsApp:

Grateful for independence mostly because British food is gross.

Just shared via LinkedIn:

Not to brag, but I’m on hold and my call is important to them.

Freshly posted on Pinterest:

A woman’s sigh can speak a 1000 words.

Reported on TikTok:

I am cool with January lasting forever because rent is due February 1.

Spotted on X:

I will always be hotter than everyone who hates me.

Home » Funny Long Weekend Quotes

Funny long weekend quotes

New funny long weekend quotes 👇

For even more funny long weekend quotes, check out the next page, if available 👇

All funny long weekend quotes & images can be used for free for non-commercial purposes 👌

New Funny Quotes
Random Funny Quotes

Welcome to Wordgag! 😉✌️ Enjoy endless laughter with our collection of funny quotes guaranteed to crack you up. 😂💥

Trending Funny Quotes 📈

Hot Funny Quotes 🔥

Trending Topics 📁

activity communication day food frustration fun humor i irony joke just know life love me media people procrastination relationship sarcasm social social media someone technology time want work

Funny Quotes Data 🤓

New Funny Quotes

1834 added this month

Funny Quotes Total

11,996

Funny Quotes Topics

14,796

Funny Quotes Images

11,996

Updated

1 minute ago

Users Online

3,453

Funny Quotes of the Month 🚀

Funny Quotes of the Year ⭐

Activity Log ✨

Someone from 🇼🇸 has bookmarked:

People say nothing is impossible, but I do nothing every day.

Someone from 🇬🇲 has copied:

Remember, when a package says “sharing size”, that’s just a guideline. They have no enforcement mechanism.

Someone from 🇧🇸 has shared:

How is every author the #1 New York Times bestseller?

Someone from 🇺🇾 has viewed:

It’s getting very expensive to be alive.

Someone from 🇰🇪 has downloaded:

They should release the Epstein list right before the Oscars.

Someone from 🇲🇭 has viewed:

I’m ready for the exciting last 30 seconds of the basketball game, which stretch into 25 minutes of fouls, time-outs, and commercials.

Someone from 🇧🇳 has downloaded:

It’s okay to embarrass yourself a little in the pursuit of human connection.

Someone from 🇲🇻 has downloaded:

Got a scam email full of mistakes like they’re not even trying. It won’t be long before AI takes their jobs.

Someone from 🇲🇭 has downloaded:

I’m exactly where I want to be. At home, avoiding people.

Someone from 🇮🇶 has viewed:

Spice up your anxiety attack by playing the Jaws theme song.

Social Media Log 💫

Breaking via Snapchat:

The global energy crisis could be solved if only we could harness the power of my wife slamming my car door.

Going viral on LinkedIn:

If you tell me to watch until the end, the end better be in five seconds.

Spotted on Messenger:

Not to brag, but I don’t need alcohol to send texts I’ll regret.

Going viral on WhatsApp:

The only appointment I’m ever on time for is disappointment.

Just shared via Pinterest:

People that ask Grok “Is this true” are the reason our society is getting dumber by the minute.

Freshly posted on Snapchat:

If you’re bored when you’re alone, obviously you’re in bad company.

Going viral on X:

If you tell lies about me, I’ll tell the truth about you.

Trending via X:

Remember that even the worst haircut will eventually grow on you.

Seen just now on Twitch:

I wish I was a cat, because the fatter you are, the more people like you.

Trending via Telegram:

Forgetting to put jewelry and perfume on is literally the worst feeling.

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