Commentary:
"Relationship status: he escaped 🏃♂️ Maybe I should start using handcuffs instead of just tying knots in the relationship 🤣 #RunawayLover"
750 Funny love quotes
Even on the coldest of days, there’s such peace found in the warm embrace of a hot pizza.
Commentary:
"Who needs a cozy blanket when you have a steaming hot pizza to snuggle up with on icy days? 🍕🔥 Embracing that delicious warmth beats frostbite any day! #PizzaHugs"
“Are you single?” No, I’m in a hallucinationship.
Commentary:
"Relationship status: Currently in a committed Hallucinationship. It’s complicated, but at least the arguments are never dull! 🤪💑 #HallucinationshipGoals"
One thing I love about the internet is seeing some of the most hateful people posting inspirational quotes.
Commentary:
Ah, the internet – where keyboard warriors transform into motivational speakers, spreading positivity with the same passion they reserve for trolling. 😂🌈 Let's just hope they find some inspiration themselves amidst all that hate! #KeyboardWarriorsTurnedGurus 🙌
Іf you’re sad about being alone on Valentine’s Day, just remember that nobody loves you on any other day of the year either.
Commentary:
Don't let Valentine's Day bring you down! Remember, you're consistently unloved all year round – now that's what I call consistency! 😅💔 #ValentinesDayBlues
Valentine’s Day this week. If you have a crush on me we still have time to get cards and shave.
Commentary:
"Valentine's Day approaching! Quick, if you have a crush on me, there's still time to get cards and shave… well, at least the cards are easier to find! 😂💘 #LastMinuteLove"
I’d pretend to care about football for you.
Commentary:
"Sure, I'd totally watch football with you… for the snacks 🍟 and the occasional 'touchdown' dance 💃🏈 Who am I kidding, let's just order pizza and call it a day! 🍕😄"
I love coming home and being at home and sitting inside my home and staying home.
Commentary:
"Home is where the heart is…and apparently where all the fun is too! 🏠❤️ Who needs to go out when you're living the thrilling life of 'Home Sweet Home' on repeat? Just remember to occasionally venture outdoors for Vitamin D and social interaction…or not. 😉 #HomebodyGoals"
You are my favorite dirty thought.
Commentary:
"Ah, love is in the air…along with a hint of mischief! 😉💭 Dirty thoughts make the heart grow fonder, they say. Just remember to keep it PG-13, or at least try to! 😜💋"
Only a couple more days until I come home and pretend I forgot about Valentine’s Day.
Commentary:
"Counting down the days until I can pull off the ultimate 'I totally forgot, but here's a last-minute surprise' 😅💘 Who needs a calendar when you've got strategic procrastination skills? 📆 #RomanticSlacker"