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10,000+ funny quotes

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Someone from 🇵🇭 has bookmarked:

Y’all aren’t taking beautiful women to jazz clubs anymore, and that’s the problem.

Someone from 🇨🇦 has viewed:

I don’t dress for women. I don’t dress for men. I dress for the weather, mainly.

Someone from 🇩🇰 has shared:

My shadow quit because I’m too boring.

Someone from 🇵🇾 has viewed:

Sometimes the whole point of going out is to then really savor coming back home.

Someone from 🇸🇳 has downloaded:

Prison pen pal doesn’t want us to write each other anymore. Finds my life too depressing.

Someone from 🇲🇼 has shared:

Oh, I didn’t tell you? Must have been none of your business, then.

Someone from 🇹🇷 has viewed:

Imagine being in the Trojan horse with the lads, pure darkness and giggling like hehehe

Someone from 🇰🇼 has copied:

If the apple really doesn’t fall far from the tree, my kids are screwed.

Someone from 🇵🇰 has downloaded:

Why the hell did they name them ‘Soldier ants’ and not ‘Combatants’?

Someone from 🇮🇶 has viewed:

You come from dust and you will return to dust. That’s why I don’t dust. It could be someone I know.

Funny Quotes Data 🤓

New Funny Quotes

242 this month

Funny Quotes Total

15,511

Funny Quotes Topics

17,578

Funny Quotes Images

15,511

Updated

Jan 7, 2026

Users Online

3,396

Social Media Log 💫

Freshly posted on Pinterest:

I just want someone who can read a book with me in silence, and then do ungodly things sometimes.

Just shared via TikTok:

My coworkers think I’m always busy, but I’m really just trying to remember my password.

Spotted on Pinterest:

Presumably, if you had a time machine, you could just kill young adult Hitler. The baby part seems gratuitous.

Shared recently on Discord:

Marriage is scary, what if he doesn’t want our house to look like my Pinterest board.

Just landed via Slack:

It’s funny how drinking 8 cups of water a day seems impossible, but 7 beers and 5 shots in two hours go down like a fat kid on a seesaw.

Just shared via Discord:

My problem is, I wanna be the only one at the gym when I go.

Making waves on WeChat:

Imagine hating me, and I’m just over here making love.

Shared recently on Threads:

Nothing more rude than taking a photo of yourself and it looking like how you actually look, and not how you look inside your head.

Broadcasted on Facebook:

I miss when 1K was a lot of money.

Funny prep quotes

New funny prep quotes 👇

Lowkey wanna fall in love, but Monday to Friday is work, Saturday is laundry, Sunday is mental prep for Monday. The butterflies in my stomach are actually decomposing.

0

2 months ago

actually, butterfly, fall, Friday, humor, laundry, love, mental, mental prep, Monday, prep, procrastination, relationship, Saturday, stomach, stress, Sunday, weekend, work

Someone from 🇩🇿 has recently copied this quote.

15 shares on Instagram this month.
The problem with meal prep is you have to eat the meal that you prepped.

0

3 months ago

cooking, eat, eating, food, humor, meal, meal prep, prep, problem

Someone from 🇸🇱 has recently copied this quote.

34 shares on Discord this month.

All funny prep quotes & images can be used for free for non-commercial purposes 👌

New Funny Quotes

🎲 Random Funny Quotes

Welcome to Wordgag! 😉✌️ Enjoy endless laughter with our collection of funny quotes guaranteed to crack you up. 😂💥

Social Media Stars ⭐

98 shares on YouTube this month:

The note on this boxed wine says ‘Fresh up to 6 weeks after opening’. 6 weeks. Lol.

42 shares on Reddit this month:

I can turn wine into water about two hours after drinking it. Checkmate Jesus.

35 shares on TikTok this month:

Tried to be a responsible adult today. Won’t be doing that again.

23 shares on Telegram this month:

The October urge to live in a sleepy seaside town with a horrifying backstory.

97 shares on WeChat this month:

The way people who are really into each other look moments before kissing is so hot. It’s like seeing a glimpse of cannibalism.

68 shares on Telegram this month:

Half princess, half menace.

19 shares on WhatsApp this month:

When I’m done eating… I have to show my hands to my cat, like I’m a blackjack dealer.

63 shares on LinkedIn this month:

“I’m depressed because there’s not enough cheese in this world to satisfy my hunger for it.”

89 shares on Facebook this month:

Social media needs to crash for like a year so everybody can snap back into reality.

46 shares on Messenger this month:

I’m sick of blessings in disguise. I am ready for a blessing with absolutely no disguise whatsoever.

Activity Log ✨

Someone from 🇫🇮 has copied:

Updating my resume. Anyone got a more professional word for “dumpster fire”?

Someone from 🇦🇬 has viewed:

“Grey” is a better spelling than “gray” because “e” is a greyer letter than “a.” I will not elaborate.

Someone from 🇧🇦 has viewed:

I told my wife to embrace her mistakes. She gave me a hug.

Someone from 🇷🇺 has shared:

69% of people find something dirty in every sentence.

Someone from 🇮🇷 has copied:

It’s so important to warm up before any physical activity, like getting out of bed.

Someone from 🇺🇦 has copied:

I assume people who bookmark my posts are building a case against me.

Someone from 🇩🇯 has downloaded:

One or the other, Lord – I can’t be broke and heartbroken.

Someone from 🇦🇹 has viewed:

Hey, I noticed you’re completely uninterested in me and couldn’t care whether I live or die. Would you like to build a life together?

Someone from 🇮🇹 has viewed:

The week before your period doesn’t make any sense… until you realize it’s the week before your period.

Someone from 🇺🇿 has downloaded:

You want to go out in the sun and then you can’t get the couch through the door.

Social Media Log 💫

Shared recently on Slack:

I need a massage for my brain.

Breaking via YouTube:

A lot of people are afraid of heights. Not me, I’m afraid of widths.

Shared recently on Twitch:

Yes, we absolutely can push our meeting to sometime after the new year, or mid-March, or the year after next, or never.

Making waves on Instagram:

My idea of fun is watching something on the TV while I look at relevant Wikipedia articles on my phone.

Seen just now on WeChat:

If we breakup because you “wanna focus on school,” I better see you in Harvard.

Making waves on Twitch:

Just got diagnosed with needing a hot chocolate with extra marshmallows.

Just landed via Snapchat:

At first, big breasts were attractive, then suddenly it was big butts. I’m waiting for it to finally be big bellies.

Making waves on YouTube:

Eat like your treadmill is watching.

Seen just now on Facebook:

Biting the heads off all these gingerbread men if you wanna swing by.

Spreading quickly via WeChat:

I can’t believe we became the adults in the most unaffordable period in history.

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Activity Log ✨

Funny prep quotes

New funny prep quotes 👇

Lowkey wanna fall in love, but Monday to Friday is work, Saturday is laundry, Sunday is mental prep for Monday. The butterflies in my stomach are actually decomposing.

The problem with meal prep is you have to eat the meal that you prepped.

All funny prep quotes & images can be used for free for non-commercial purposes 👌

Social Media Stars ⭐

Trending Topics 📁

Activity Log ✨