Wordgag ツ

10,000+ funny quotes

Activity Log ✨

Someone from 🇵🇪 has shared:

I’m so single right now, I can’t even spell relayshaunship.

Someone from 🇰🇲 has viewed:

I went downstairs to get my charger. I came back up with a bowl of ice cream and no charger.

Someone from 🇩🇿 has downloaded:

Pro tip: When you sign up for anything online, put the website’s name as your middle name. Now, when you receive spam, you will know who sold your data.

Someone from 🇰🇷 has viewed:

“Listen to your body!” Okay, well, my body wants to lay down and eat snacks all day.

Someone from 🇮🇷 has bookmarked:

No one lies more than a parent who says, “We’ll see.” You know we’re not seeing anything.

Someone from 🇳🇮 has copied:

I’m tired and drank a lot of coffee, so now I’m tired but faster.

Someone from 🇷🇼 has viewed:

I wonder if this next thunderstorm is thinking of me, too.

Someone from 🇦🇩 has shared:

My cats won’t talk to me because I came home late from work.

Someone from 🇬🇷 has bookmarked:

I was going to warn my kids about the repercussions of drugs and alcohol until I realized that they in fact were the repercussions of drugs and alcohol.

Someone from 🇨🇻 has shared:

I don’t understand why judges get paid so much, others judge me for free.

Funny Quotes Data 🤓

New Funny Quotes

218 this month

Funny Quotes Total

15,487

Funny Quotes Topics

17,559

Funny Quotes Images

15,487

Updated

Jan 5, 2026

Users Online

3,664

Social Media Log 💫

Just landed via LinkedIn:

The ultimate student paradox: skipping class to avoid stress, only to stress about skipping class!

Making waves on Telegram:

Sometimes I delete a post because I remember I’m too old for it.

Spotted on Facebook:

He probably follows so many women because he believes in elevating their voices.

Just shared via WeChat:

Time needs a speed limit.

Making waves on Pinterest:

Sure, my internet service is overpriced and spotty but you can’t put a price on unintentionally being dropped from every Zoom meeting.

Just shared via Reddit:

I never thought I would say this, and it took me a while to come to terms, but I think I ate too much bacon.

Freshly posted on Telegram:

“I’m gonna sneak past you.” No you’re not. You’ve alerted me.

Trending via YouTube:

I’m dying for some sweets and the only thing sweet in the house is me.

Seen just now on Messenger:

Threatening my wife with a tariff every time she makes fun of me.

Seen just now on Pinterest:

Can the AI bubble just pop already? Everyone hates this crap.

Funny ransom quotes

Funny ransom quotes unlock a world of cheeky humor and clever wordplay that turn a serious situation into a laugh-out-loud moment 😂🔐 Whether you’re looking to prank a friend or add some spice to your messages, these witty lines bring a playful twist to the art of ransom notes 💌🎭 Get ready to giggle and unleash your inner mischief-maker with the funniest ransom quotes around! 😜🕵️‍♂️

New funny ransom quotes 👇

All funny ransom quotes & images can be used for free for non-commercial purposes 👌

New Funny Quotes
🎲 Random Funny Quotes

Welcome to Wordgag! 😉✌️ Enjoy endless laughter with our collection of funny quotes guaranteed to crack you up. 😂💥

Social Media Stars ⭐

17 shares on LinkedIn this month:

I hate how everything is organic now. I miss chemicals.

98 shares on WhatsApp this month:

Amazon cart: Order now and it will arrive today. Amazon confirmation email: LOL, just kidding, it’ll be a week from tomorrow.

54 shares on Facebook this month:

I wish more modern politics were about trying to stop the fulfillment of an ancient prophecy.

62 shares on Facebook this month:

If you saw me licking the plate after the charcuterie was finished, no you didn’t.

73 shares on Discord this month:

If I’m ever the problem, you’re the reason.

66 shares on Telegram this month:

Does anyone know if it’s possible to buy the transcripts of audiobooks? Thanks!

27 shares on Messenger this month:

Oxygen was discovered in 1773. How did our ancestors breathe before then?

13 shares on Threads this month:

It is easier to pass a camel through the eye of a needle than it is to convince somebody online that they are wrong.

25 shares on WeChat this month:

Big fan of calling artists their first name and then the band name as their last name.

46 shares on WhatsApp this month:

My bank account and I are no longer on speaking terms.

Trending Topics 📁

activity communication day food frustration fun humor i irony joke just know life love me media people procrastination relationship sarcasm social social media someone technology time want work

Hot Jokes 💥

12 folks are currently checking 👀

The lion does not concern himself with the check engine light.

15 folks are currently checking 👀

(guy who’s not even that into you) I love you.

11 folks are currently checking 👀

Ever since I was young, I wanted to check my email for a verification code.

14 folks are currently checking 👀

If you order a pizza with veggies on it, you can tell people you had a salad.

23 folks are currently checking 👀

Cupid’s arrow should have just killed me instead.

15 folks are currently checking 👀

Sometimes, before bedtime, I fall asleep on the couch. It’s my little sleep appetizer… my nappetizer.

14 folks are currently checking 👀

My therapist said I should face my fears. So I turned my phone back on.

17 folks are currently checking 👀

It’s important to set an alarm the first day of school, so you remember to pick up the kids.

20 folks are currently checking 👀

The fewer the people, the greater the inner peace.

10 folks are currently checking 👀

Just once I’d like to hear a doctor say, “Your guess is as good as mine.”

Funny Quotes Data 🤓

New Funny Quotes

218 this month

Funny Quotes Total

15,487

Funny Quotes Topics

17,559

Funny Quotes Images

15,487

Updated

Jan 5, 2026

Users Online

3,427

Activity Log ✨

Someone from 🇷🇺 has viewed:

People will be like “there is no right or wrong way to do it” until you do it the wrong way.

Someone from 🇻🇺 has copied:

In case any nudes of me should appear somewhere: It was very cold that day.

Someone from 🇷🇸 has viewed:

Hot girls have a private Instagram account with 20 followers.

Someone from 🇰🇮 has bookmarked:

Life is too short. Tell his mom what he did to you.

Someone from 🇳🇴 has downloaded:

Americans are funny, man. “It’s 72 degrees outside.” Bro, I don’t speak oven.

Someone from 🇷🇺 has shared:

I never thought I would say this, and it took me a while to come to terms, but I think I ate too much bacon.

Someone from 🇼🇸 has shared:

You call it nagging, I call it ‘listen to what I said the first time!’

Someone from 🇪🇷 has viewed:

My transformation into a bitter, angry old woman is almost complete.

Someone from 🇦🇺 has bookmarked:

I received a bank alert text for suspicious activity. I was buying fruit.

Someone from 🇷🇴 has downloaded:

The best thing capitalism has done is put a little window on pasta boxes so the noodles can look out at the world.

Social Media Log 💫

Going bananas on LinkedIn:

My love language is deader than Latin.

Going viral on Telegram:

“Topless” doesn’t always mean breasts or a convertible. Sometimes it also means the brain.

Going bananas on Messenger:

Birthday sex is having sex to celebrate your parents having sex.

Just shared via WeChat:

“I don’t do politics.” Politics will do you, my brother and sister. Politics will do you like mad.

Just landed via Twitch:

There are days when trying to control your class is like trying to hug a tornado.

Going viral on WhatsApp:

Wild that we could have been foraging for berries and dying off at 33, but we chose this nonsense instead.

Making waves on YouTube:

Every person you meet is fighting a battle you know nothing about. Make it worse by asking if they’re drinking enough water.

Trending via Messenger:

The history of mankind would have been completely different if Adam and Eve had been Chinese. They would have left the apple hanging and eaten the snake.

Spotted on Reddit:

I think it’s very sexy of me to still move with love in a world like this.

Broadcasted on WhatsApp:

When someone yells stop I don’t know whether it’s in the name of love, it’s Hammer time, or I should smell the flowers.

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