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10,000+ funny quotes

Activity Log ✨

Someone from 🇸🇳 has viewed:

Having a sunburn is so humiliating. Now everyone knows I was unprepared for the realities of the wilderness. It marks me as the weakest link. The hungry animals are closing in.

Someone from 🇯🇵 has viewed:

Not to upset anyone, but Monday is waiting outside.

Someone from 🇳🇴 has viewed:

How old is older? Because I’m still waiting for this wise thing to kick in.

Someone from 🇺🇬 has shared:

I am AOL Instant Messenger years old.

Someone from 🇵🇰 has viewed:

Ctrl Alt delete my fat.

Someone from 🇧🇾 has downloaded:

There are risks you take when camping: severe weather, wild animals, someone bringing an acoustic guitar.

Someone from 🇨🇫 has viewed:

I bet the kids in Mrs. Doubtfire were surprised when found out their nanny was famous actor Robin Williams the whole time.

Someone from 🇧🇭 has viewed:

Peer pressure has nothing on me; all my bad decisions are made single-handedly.

Someone from 🇪🇸 has copied:

Super excited to not contribute anything worthwhile today.

Someone from 🇦🇴 has copied:

I actually think my version of the lyrics makes more sense.

Funny Quotes Data 🤓

New Funny Quotes

calculating…

Funny Quotes Total

15,753

Funny Quotes Topics

17,766

Funny Quotes Images

15,753

Feb 3, 2026

3,701

Social Media Log 💫

Live now on Pinterest:

Current situation: lying in bed, trying to manifest breakfast.

Just shared via Slack:

Partying hard on this Friday night, and by partying hard, I mean laying on my bed starfish-style.

Going bananas on Threads:

Is ChatGPT down for anyone else? I’m a neurosurgeon in the middle of brain surgery.

Shared recently on Messenger:

Nobody gets angrier than a man being accused of something he actually did.

Going viral on YouTube:

One of the biggest struggles of being an adult is deciding what to make for supper. Every. Single. Night.

Spotted on YouTube:

Just saw onto the sidelines, they literally have enough footballs for all the players, they’re making them fight over that one for no reason.

Going viral on WhatsApp:

“November Rain” is just 9 minutes of me realizing I’m too dramatic to date someone with healthy coping skills.

Breaking via LinkedIn:

Winter. You get up, drink coffee and then it gets dark.

Shared recently on X:

69% of people find something dirty in every sentence.

Seen just now on Reddit:

I don’t want to brag but I found a recipe online, and then within three weeks not only made the recipe, but closed the tab on my browser.

Funny real world quotes

Funny real world quotes bring a splash of laughter 🌟 to everyday life, turning ordinary moments into hilarious memories 😂. Whether you need a quick pick-me-up or a clever twist on reality 🤪, these gems will have you smiling in no time 😄. Get ready to see the world through a funhouse mirror 🎭 where wit meets wisdom in the most unexpected ways!

New funny real world quotes 👇

A couple of years ago, the internet was an escape from the real world. Today, the real world is an escape from the internet.

4 days ago

ago, couple, digital, digital life, escape, humor, internet, irony, life, media, modern, modern life, real, real world, social, social media, technology, today, world
If someone leaves your life, it’s often because the actor playing them is getting cancelled in the real world.

1 week ago

actor, cancelled, getting, humor, life, playing, real, real world, relationships, someone, world

All funny real world quotes & images can be used for free for non-commercial purposes 👌

Funny Quotes Collections

✨ New Funny Quotes

Social Media Stars ⭐

28 shares on Facebook this month:

I relate to a rooster because I also want start off my day by screaming.

63 shares on Facebook this month:

“Topless” doesn’t always mean breasts or a convertible. Sometimes it also means the brain.

39 shares on X this month:

I’m so vulnerable to nostalgia. The sun will go down and I’ll be like: “Wow… remember when the sun was up… I miss who I was then”

95 shares on Discord this month:

Clothes too dirty for the closet, but too clean for laundry. Welcome to: the chair.

48 shares on Twitch this month:

Enjoying the consequences of my actions.

38 shares on WeChat this month:

My first thought upon waking up in the morning is “not again”.

30 shares on Snapchat this month:

90% of my thoughts start with: “What can I eat now?”

41 shares on LinkedIn this month:

Washing machine minutes are not the same as regular minutes.

81 shares on Messenger this month:

Having a crush is so fun, it’s literally just butterflies and delusion.

31 shares on Discord this month:

Need to win the lottery so I can focus on going to museums and working out.

Trending Topics 📁

Hot Jokes 💥

18 folks are currently checking 👀

This meeting could have been a pajama party.

7 folks are currently checking 👀

As everyone was arguing about politics, no one saw me leave with the cake.

7 folks are currently checking 👀

First World War. Kind of nervous.

5 folks are currently checking 👀

Not to brag, but I’m on hold and my call is important to them.

6 folks are currently checking 👀

Engagement photo shoots are so funny as a concept. Like girl, we believed you.

5 folks are currently checking 👀

WhatsApp calls should indicate whose internet is poor to avoid unnecessary arguments.

12 folks are currently checking 👀

Forget Botox. If you really want to look younger, get braces.

18 folks are currently checking 👀

You should get a pension for having to go to school for so many years.

15 folks are currently checking 👀

Mindfulness is out. We’re doing drugs again.

15 folks are currently checking 👀

I wanna marry someone funnier than me, but sadly, I am the funniest.

Funny Quotes Data 🤓

New Funny Quotes

calculating…

Funny Quotes Total

15,753

Funny Quotes Topics

17,766

Funny Quotes Images

15,753

Updated

Feb 3, 2026

Users Online

3,716

Activity Log ✨

Someone from 🇳🇷 has downloaded:

November moving quicker than two lesbians who met three days ago.

Someone from 🇬🇶 has shared:

People say “I would never,” then here they come nevering like they never nevered before.

Someone from 🇯🇵 has shared:

The problem with dating apps is I don’t wanna date someone that would use a dating app.

Someone from 🇳🇮 has shared:

My idea of housework is to sweep the room with a glance.

Someone from 🇱🇹 has shared:

Dating after 40 is like trying to find the least damaged item at the thrift store that doesn’t smell.

Someone from 🇨🇾 has downloaded:

Unemployed folks always have esoteric knowledge, for some reason.

Someone from 🇦🇪 has downloaded:

The devil is keeping him alive to avoid spending eternity with him in hell.

Someone from 🇵🇭 has shared:

The longer you go without something, the more comfortable you become without it. That goes for people, too.

Someone from 🇧🇷 has shared:

I left the house with wet hair and no makeup on, so I’m sure I’ll run into everyone I know.

Someone from 🇦🇩 has shared:

My future wife is probably fake laughing at her boyfriend’s lame jokes right now. Be patient, Queen, a true clown is on the way.

Social Media Log 💫

Going bananas on LinkedIn:

I want to make you say, “Oh God,” in a way that makes God nervous.

Making waves on Snapchat:

According to the web, caffeine deficiency is a life threatening condition for people around you.

Making waves on Instagram:

According to autocorrect, my favorite Star Wars character is Bob’s Feet.

Going viral on Telegram:

The Christmas tree I’ve had up all year makes a lot more sense now.

Broadcasted on YouTube:

I like driving by myself. I just played the same song 36 times.

Going viral on Discord:

I got Botox, and I asked the doctor, “How many years younger will this make me look?” and he was like, “Zero. You’ll just look like the other girls your age who have also gotten Botox.”

Live now on Twitch:

Is it just me, or does anybody else get excited about cancelling plans?

Spotted on Discord:

Anyone who says he can see through women is missing a lot.

Making waves on X:

“We will go ahead and make these changes if we don’t hear from you before Friday” is such an elegant way to solve problems.

Going bananas on Reddit:

Damn, girl, are you Black Friday? Because I’m wondering what your bloody deal is.

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