Wordgag ツ

10,000+ funny quotes

Activity Log ✨

Someone from 🇩🇪 has shared:

Why are they called “grammar Nazis” and not “the Gestypo”?

Someone from 🇮🇸 has viewed:

When I was a kid, I thought cicadas were the sound sunshine makes when it’s real hot outside.

Someone from 🇱🇻 has bookmarked:

Just got some minutes of cardio trying to pick up an ice cube from the kitchen floor.

Someone from 🇨🇦 has shared:

I hope one day I will sleep before midnight like normal humans do. Every day I sleep tomorrow, even yesterday I slept today.

Someone from 🇲🇰 has shared:

I think the key to happiness is having plenty of money and then telling all the poor people that money can’t buy happiness.

Someone from 🇺🇸 has copied:

Objection your honor, if the prosecutor doesn’t have anything nice to say then he shouldn’t say anything at all.

Someone from 🇰🇼 has bookmarked:

I am the first person in my bloodline to attempt to become hot, and I can feel my genes fighting me every step of the way.

Someone from 🇨🇱 has viewed:

If you collect the crumbs from one Nature Valley granola bar, you can make three more granola bars.

Someone from 🇬🇾 has bookmarked:

Once again, I have fallen for life’s biggest scam: being two hours early for a flight only for security to take roughly seven minutes.

Someone from 🇰🇷 has copied:

College core: you sit in the class for attendance, then go home and teach yourself.

Funny Quotes Data 🤓

New Funny Quotes

calculating…

Funny Quotes Total

15,753

Funny Quotes Topics

17,766

Funny Quotes Images

15,753

Updated

Feb 3, 2026

Users Online

3,402

Social Media Log 💫

Going viral on Twitch:

Therapists probably have to struggle so hard not to ask to see pictures of the people their clients are obsessing over.

Shared recently on Telegram:

I brake for no one, except squirrels.

Going bananas on Twitch:

I will never sell out my integrity unless I am offered something for it.

Spotted on Slack:

Twitter is fun. You kinda just talk to yourself and sometimes someone replies.

Going viral on Slack:

I told my wife the laundry on the couch ain’t gonna fold itself, so if y’all don’t hear from me later, she probably folded me like an omelet.

Just landed via Telegram:

I was disappointed to learn today that my request for a sabbatical was rejected. Apparently that’s “not how marriage works.”

Just shared via Pinterest:

Bag of flesh that acts weird when another bag of flesh doesn’t send symbols on glowing screen.

Freshly posted on Discord:

Taking the day off to brush up on conspiracy theories and really get this family party started.

Freshly posted on Facebook:

I wish my life could have a stats screen but for things I care about. Like how many English Muffins with peanut butter I’ve eaten.

Making waves on Messenger:

Men can stay up til 2 a.m., wake up at 6, be in debt, broke, alone, and still have faith that one day, everything will work out. It’s called being a man.

Funny rows quotes

Funny rows quotes bring a splash of humor to those everyday tiffs we all face 😄💥 Whether it’s a silly spat or a playful disagreement, these witty lines turn tension into laughter 😂🔥 Perfect for sharing with friends or lightening the mood, get ready to giggle and see arguments in a whole new, funny light! 🎉💬

New funny rows quotes 👇

All funny rows quotes & images can be used for free for non-commercial purposes 👌

Random Funny Quotes

Social Media Stars ⭐

43 shares on YouTube this month:

A thousand curses upon anyone who has ever gone, “Why are you sitting in the dark?” and then flipped the light on without asking.

33 shares on X this month:

If she tells you, she’s got a man, keep trying. Loyal women don’t even reply.

64 shares on Slack this month:

Christmas lights: the only thing bright around here besides my personality.

87 shares on WeChat this month:

Not gonna lie, the age I’m turning this year sounds a little serious, and I don’t like it.

78 shares on Instagram this month:

My brain doesn’t sea typos until I’ve already hit send.

97 shares on Threads this month:

I just found out it takes 5 sheep to make one wool sweater. I didn’t even know they knew how to knit.

63 shares on Discord this month:

Legos are too expensive nowadays. They should go back to costing as much as they did when my parents paid for them.

43 shares on Discord this month:

That moment when you realize “yeah, this person is never gonna hear from me again” is so crazy.

14 shares on X this month:

I slept like a baby, knowing I’m a burden to everyone around me.

48 shares on Twitch this month:

People be like “bear with me” and they don’t even have a bear with them.

Trending Topics 📁

activity communication day food frustration fun humor i irony joke just know life love me media people procrastination relationship sarcasm social social media someone technology time want work

Hot Jokes 💥

21 folks are currently checking 👀

Did you ever stop to ask how Mercury feels about being in retrograde? No, because you only think about yourself.

20 folks are currently checking 👀

Cancelling a date so I can order pizza and go to bed at 8:30 p.m.

21 folks are currently checking 👀

It’s important to set an alarm the first day of school, so you remember to pick up the kids.

18 folks are currently checking 👀

My ducks are not even remotely in a row. My ducks are in places no duck has ever gone before.

11 folks are currently checking 👀

If barking at nothing was an Olympic sport, my dog would win gold.

9 folks are currently checking 👀

Wondering when these skinny jeans are gonna kick in.

19 folks are currently checking 👀

I really cannot be friends with picky eaters because it somehow always correlates to bigger problems and character flaws.

12 folks are currently checking 👀

The knife is my brush, the jam my paint and the toast my canvas.

20 folks are currently checking 👀

You don’t scare me. You’re not the evil eye I get from my dog when I make him get up from the couch so I can lay down.

15 folks are currently checking 👀

I didn’t mean to mimic your voice, I just had to know what it felt like to sound like that.

Funny Quotes Data 🤓

New Funny Quotes

calculating…

Funny Quotes Total

15,753

Funny Quotes Topics

17,766

Funny Quotes Images

15,753

Updated

Feb 3, 2026

Users Online

3,604

Activity Log ✨

Someone from 🇻🇳 has bookmarked:

It’s like 10,000 lies when all you need is the files.

Someone from 🇪🇷 has bookmarked:

America is truly the best country in the world at not learning from their mistakes.

Someone from 🇧🇳 has viewed:

I took the road less traveled. Where am I?

Someone from 🇬🇦 has viewed:

Adding geologist to my resume after hitting rock bottom.

Someone from 🇫🇯 has shared:

“How would you describe yourself.” Me: I absolutely would not.

Someone from 🇧🇾 has bookmarked:

The devil couldn’t reach me, so he made sure that the love I give is never reciprocated.

Someone from 🇸🇱 has copied:

Someone in their late 20s giving advice to someone in their early 20s is exactly like when a toddler is obsessed with a newborn.

Someone from 🇪🇪 has shared:

It’s not true that I had nothing on. I had the radio on.

Someone from 🇺🇬 has shared:

None of the Instagram story fonts represent me.

Someone from 🇧🇿 has copied:

I hate when I lose things at work, like pens, papers, sanity and dreams.

Social Media Log 💫

Breaking via Twitch:

Keep scrolling, I’ve got nothing.

Freshly posted on Threads:

I love being a girly girl and going to sleep all moisturized, juicy, and soft. Lip balm on. Layering on scents just to beauty rest.

Freshly posted on WhatsApp:

My dad told my sister’s new boyfriend to stand at the end of the picture so he can crop him out whenever she dumps him.

Going viral on YouTube:

I have read the room and decided to be illiterate.

Just shared via TikTok:

As long as I’m alive, I can begin again and again and again, again and again and again, again and again and again.

Just landed via Discord:

I wonder if my bank account thinks about me and has panic attacks.

Freshly posted on WeChat:

There are people who have a favourite colour, and there are people whose favourite colour is purple. These are very different things. Purple fans are different creatures.

Making waves on Discord:

Lovingly looking at my dog knowing I’m about to ruin her day with a bath.

Spotted on Slack:

Lazy is such an ugly word. I prefer to call it selective participation.

Trending via Discord:

My last husband’s name is Don. I just added an E to it and walked away.

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