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10,000+ funny quotes

Activity Log ✨

Someone from 🇰🇮 has downloaded:

I have a drawer in my kitchen that I can’t open anymore because of that one time I decided to put a spatula in it.

Someone from 🇿🇼 has downloaded:

My account is fake, I’m actually your probation officer.

Someone from 🇵🇹 has shared:

This can’t be the same body that used to be able to stay up all night.

Someone from 🇨🇭 has bookmarked:

Most people prefer lies. The truth just hits them like a WiFi outage, and then they just stand there, confused and buffering.

Someone from 🇹🇴 has viewed:

Not to brag but I am evidence of things unseen.

Someone from 🇳🇴 has bookmarked:

If a dog growled at me, I would try to understand where they’re coming from.

Someone from 🇸🇲 has downloaded:

Have you tried complaining about it?

Someone from 🇱🇮 has bookmarked:

Instead of writing LOL, I’m going to start writing SALTS (smiled a little, then stopped). It’s more accurate.

Someone from 🇹🇱 has copied:

Oh good. Another day.

Someone from 🇻🇪 has copied:

I don’t think inside the box and I don’t think outside the box. I don’t even know where the box is.

Funny Quotes Data 🤓

New Funny Quotes

783 added this month

Funny Quotes Total

10,945

Funny Quotes Topics

13,916

Funny Quotes Images

10,945

55 minutes ago

3,424

Social Media Log 💫

Shared recently on Facebook:

I never knew how fast I could write until the teacher said pencils down.

Going viral on Facebook:

I’ve walked the walk, but nowadays I just sit the sit.

Trending via Slack:

Called in, “If we’re living in a simulation, just simulate that I’m in the office today.”

Seen just now on Messenger:

Any jar is a swear jar when the lid won’t open.

Freshly posted on Twitch:

Proverbs are so mean. Like, I don’t deserve any worm because I woke up at 11am? Like, no worm at all?

Freshly posted on Telegram:

Where do you see yourself five beers from now? What’s your five-beer plan?

Shared recently on Discord:

Got too drunk in the Vietnamese restaurant last night, they said I can never go back. They banh mi.

Just landed via Twitch:

Guys only want one thing and it’s my grandmother’s meatball recipe.

Shared recently on X:

Real introverts are too introverted to tell people they’re introverts.

Breaking via WeChat:

Whoever coined the term coined the term coined the term coined the term.

Home » Funny Stealth Quotes

Funny stealth quotes

New funny stealth quotes 👇

6 months ago
Share →: As I’m moonwalking away, they didn’t even notice I had stolen a brownie.

Commentary:
"Smooth criminal! 🕺🏻🍫 Talk about a stealthy snack attack – moonwalking into sweet temptation! 😂 Who needs attention when you've got a stolen brownie to moonwalk away with? 😜"
6 months ago
Share →: I suppose the supreme discipline for ninjas is sneaking up with flip flops.

Commentary:
Oh, the sound of silence amplified by flip flops – the ultimate paradox for ninjas! 🤫👣 Imagine a stealthy assassin trying to sneak up on you with the rhythmic clack-clack-clack of flip flops. 🙊👡 Maybe they're training for the "Ninja Summer Edition"! 🔥😂
6 months ago
Share →: When someone touches my phone, I automatically turn into a ninja.

Commentary:
"Handle my phone with caution, or I might just ninja chop your hand away! 📱💥🥋 #PhoneProtectionNinja"

For even more funny stealth quotes, check out the next page, if available 👇

All funny stealth quotes & images can be used for free for non-commercial purposes 👌

New Funny Quotes

Random Funny Quotes

Welcome to Wordgag! 😉✌️ Enjoy endless laughter with our collection of funny quotes guaranteed to crack you up. 😂💥

Trending Funny Quotes 📈

Hot Funny Quotes 🔥

Trending Topics 📁

Funny Quotes Data 🤓

New Funny Quotes

783 added this month

Funny Quotes Total

10,945

Funny Quotes Topics

13,916

Funny Quotes Images

10,945

55 minutes ago

3,430

Funny Quotes of the Month 🚀

Funny Quotes of the Year ⭐

Activity Log ✨

Someone from 🇪🇬 has shared:

You ask a girl if she ate, and she gon say, “Yeah, I had my coffee.”

Someone from 🇦🇸 has copied:

They should invent a day where I don’t think.

Someone from 🇾🇪 has shared:

Does anyone know the password to my work computer? Or how to do my job?

Someone from 🇵🇹 has shared:

Do you ever want sleep but sleep doesn’t want you?

Someone from 🇵🇪 has copied:

I wonder if babies know that we are more terrified of them than they are of us.

Someone from 🇹🇩 has viewed:

I don’t think humans were put on this earth to know what Salesforce is. It’s unnatural.

Someone from 🇨🇴 has downloaded:

Feeling weird from my cookie-based diet.

Someone from 🇻🇺 has viewed:

How long does it take for an apple to turn brown after you cut it? Never mind.

Someone from 🇰🇳 has bookmarked:

On Twitter, you will always find someone who is tweeting your thoughts but with better grammar.

Someone from 🇲🇨 has shared:

Don’t forget to brush your teeth, comb your hair, cleanse your face, and share my posts.

Social Media Log 💫

Trending via Slack:

Yes, I’ve gained weight. Too many people wanted to have sex with me. It was annoying.

Making waves on YouTube:

Tai Chi is so crazy because it’s like throwing a slow motion tantrum.

Going viral on LinkedIn:

Sorry I’m late. The door said PULL, but I don’t believe everything I read.

Seen just now on Telegram:

World domination? I don’t even want to be responsible for myself.

Reported on Snapchat:

I will never understand people’s fascination with their ancestry, isn’t knowing your current family bad enough.

Just shared via TikTok:

I tell my kids winning isn’t everything and then I steal money from the monopoly bank.

Shared recently on Messenger:

Pretty cool that we all come together on Christmas and celebrate the birth of Santa.

Seen just now on Telegram:

Career? Never heard of her. I’m majoring in sunshine and snacks.

Going viral on WhatsApp:

Socialism is like polio, it comes back when people forget about the horrible damage it did last time.

Just landed via Threads:

Once again I feel like I slept in a washing machine.

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