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10,000+ funny quotes

Activity Log ✨

Someone from 🇬🇾 has shared:

Hello, I’m a professor in a movie. I only reach the main point of my lecture right as class is ending. Then I yell at students about the reading / homework as they leave.

Someone from 🇵🇬 has bookmarked:

I hate to break it to you, guys, but my husband says you’re not real. He just called you my imaginary friends.

Someone from 🇨🇴 has viewed:

When I was a kid I would say I’m whatever age and a half because I wanted to be older. Now I say I turned 40 a few years ago.

Someone from 🇳🇦 has copied:

Who needs a dominatrix when you can be beaten up by an automatically retracting vacuum cleaner cable?

Someone from 🇩🇯 has shared:

Discovered a new coping mechanism called lashing out and making your loved ones resent you.

Someone from 🇬🇾 has bookmarked:

Someone at work is gonna suggest you download Outlook and Teams on your phone, and it’s very important that you don’t listen to them.

Someone from 🇵🇦 has downloaded:

I fractured my laziness and dislocated my interest.

Someone from 🇼🇸 has downloaded:

Who needs therapy when you can just cry in a fast-food parking lot.

Someone from 🇧🇮 has viewed:

Welcome to adulthood. You have a favorite gas station now.

Someone from 🇰🇬 has shared:

Guilty pleasure? Why would I ever feel guilty about pleasure.

Funny Quotes Data 🤓

New Funny Quotes

242 this month

Funny Quotes Total

15,511

Funny Quotes Topics

17,578

Funny Quotes Images

15,511

Updated

Jan 7, 2026

Users Online

3,657

Social Media Log 💫

Making waves on Discord:

There is no actual wolf in Wolf of Wall Street.

Live now on Twitch:

I got fired from my job at the massage parlor. No specific reason, apparently I just rub people the wrong way.

Just landed via Instagram:

Remember, when asking for a raise, it is considered customary to be sober.

Live now on Instagram:

A hostile alien invasion sounds like a nice change of pace.

Spotted on Messenger:

When I was a kid there were two sure ways to die, natural causes and talking back to your parents.

Freshly posted on Twitch:

The night before a day off is more satisfying than the actual day off.

Freshly posted on Snapchat:

Video games are great. They let you try out your craziest fantasies. For example, on The Sims, you can have a job and a house.

Spotted on LinkedIn:

Twitter is basically introverts gone wild.

Freshly posted on Slack:

Male birth control is free, and it’s called wearing Crocs with socks.

Going bananas on YouTube:

Funny The Love Boat quotes

New funny The Love Boat quotes 👇

I was guest-starring on The Love Boat when you woke me up. You’re dead to me.

0

2 months ago

boat, comedy, dead, dead to me, guest, guest star, humor, i, irritation, love, me, relationships, sarcasm, show, star, The Love Boat, TV, TV Show, wake, wake up, woke

Someone from 🇱🇹 has recently copied this quote.

68 shares on Messenger this month.

All funny The Love Boat quotes & images can be used for free for non-commercial purposes 👌

New Funny Quotes

🎲 Random Funny Quotes

Welcome to Wordgag! 😉✌️ Enjoy endless laughter with our collection of funny quotes guaranteed to crack you up. 😂💥

Social Media Stars ⭐

88 shares on Slack this month:

Forrest Gump is a haunting film about how long you have to wait for a bus in America.

53 shares on Pinterest this month:

The reason most of us stay up late is because we don’t want our free time to end, and tomorrow to start.

95 shares on Pinterest this month:

My daughter’s morning alarm is less to wake her up, and more to warn the rest of us.

72 shares on X this month:

Every day, I’m gaslit into oblivion by beautiful women, and then I go to sleep.

50 shares on Slack this month:

My guardian angel is probably preoccupied with sports betting apps and generative AI, that’s why she’s letting all these bad things happen to me.

39 shares on Threads this month:

Everything is awful, and no one is going to save you from this treacherous world. Oops, I mean, happy Friday!

68 shares on Instagram this month:

Don’t disrespect me and then be the moral compass on how I respond.

57 shares on Threads this month:

Some people stay longer in a toilet than in a relationship.

54 shares on Discord this month:

My doctor just diagnosed me with anxiety and constipation. Now I’m worried shitless.

33 shares on Messenger this month:

Someone from Facebook Marketplace is coming over to either buy the chairs I have for sale, or to murder me.

Activity Log ✨

Someone from 🇭🇹 has shared:

Not again. I mean good morning.

Someone from 🇨🇱 has copied:

Being silly is very important for my mental health.

Someone from 🇰🇮 has copied:

Who’s up thinking about the crushing weight of existence?

Someone from 🇬🇼 has bookmarked:

I still make time for all my favorite hobbies, like drinking, swearing, and making people feel uncomfortable.

Someone from 🇧🇹 has downloaded:

I love replying to people within seconds. Hello. I am here. Always.

Someone from 🇸🇾 has downloaded:

The older I get, the more I don’t want to do things.

Someone from 🇱🇷 has viewed:

I love when my brain cells kiss and I have an idea.

Someone from 🇱🇧 has viewed:

If you ever get attacked by a shark, just be a good sport about it and let it eat you. Hey, look on the bright side: It’s a rare occurrence, so you’re special.

Someone from 🇲🇲 has viewed:

I’m cosplaying as a functional adult again.

Someone from 🇳🇴 has downloaded:

I think the bowl of ice cream I ate earlier gave me a stomach ache, so I ate a another bowl to make sure.

Social Media Log 💫

Just landed via YouTube:

As long as everything is exactly the way I want it, I’m totally flexible.

Going viral on Threads:

Nostalgia is mostly dumb nonsense, but movie rental stores were legitimately better than streaming.

Going viral on Pinterest:

Flirting when bored can really get you into some unwanted situations.

Just landed via TikTok:

So many people these days are too judgmental. I can tell just by looking at them.

Freshly posted on Reddit:

Waiting for my wife to approve my new year’s resolution of making independent decisions.

Spreading quickly via WhatsApp:

I’m going to be real pissed if I get my shit together and the world ends.

Going viral on WhatsApp:

No LinkedIn, I am not “open to work,” I am required to work.

Going viral on Instagram:

I used to have this mental illness, where I thought logical arguments would change someone’s mind.

Freshly posted on Twitch:

For a guy supposedly called my “brother,” I’ve never seen him make broth even once.

Going viral on TikTok:

Double chins are better than double faces.

Wordgag ツ

Activity Log ✨

Funny The Love Boat quotes

New funny The Love Boat quotes 👇

I was guest-starring on The Love Boat when you woke me up. You’re dead to me.

All funny The Love Boat quotes & images can be used for free for non-commercial purposes 👌

Social Media Stars ⭐

Trending Topics 📁

Activity Log ✨