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10,000+ funny quotes

Activity Log ✨

Someone from 🇲🇿 has copied:

If I’m ever found dead in the woods, it’s probably because I was trying to pet a bear.

Someone from 🇧🇧 has downloaded:

Do you think the washing machine and the dryer are actual friends or just work friends?

Someone from 🇱🇮 has downloaded:

Some nights I stay up hella late just farting.

Someone from 🇵🇼 has copied:

In my experience, bowling and pancakes have the same energy. High hopes at the beginning, lowered self-esteem at the end.

Someone from 🇲🇷 has shared:

Every morning I wake up and make the worst possible time management decisions anyone has ever made.

Someone from 🇮🇪 has shared:

The empty side of your bed is for books and chocolate, not for liars who snore.

Someone from 🇱🇻 has shared:

I just wish I had the confidence of my husband who thinks everything only takes 5 minutes.

Someone from 🇦🇱 has downloaded:

I love being a girly girl and going to sleep all moisturized, juicy, and soft. Lip balm on. Layering on scents just to beauty rest.

Someone from 🇴🇲 has viewed:

Of all her outfits, my shirt and no underwear will always be my favorite.

Someone from 🇹🇿 has downloaded:

Ok, new plan, I’m gonna marry a Kardashian.

Funny Quotes Data 🤓

New Funny Quotes

calculating…

Funny Quotes Total

15,753

Funny Quotes Topics

17,766

Funny Quotes Images

15,753

Updated

Feb 3, 2026

Users Online

3,716

Social Media Log 💫

Just landed via Facebook:

If only guys would moan in bed like they do in the gym…

Shared recently on Messenger:

Going from “I can fix her” to “I don’t care if she lives or dies” in the same beer.

Going viral on Discord:

Always be kind. You never know who might own a jacuzzi.

Shared recently on LinkedIn:

Well, maybe grass should touch me for once. How about that?

Going bananas on Messenger:

If anyone is still on Facebook, please check on my parents.

Freshly posted on X:

My bank account and I are no longer on speaking terms.

Going viral on Instagram:

Be nice to your children’s teachers. Especially elementary ones, cause kids have loose lips and that teacher has all the dirt on you.

Live now on X:

Asbestos? I’m doing asbestos I can.

Going viral on Slack:

I dreamed I won the lottery, so you can imagine how thrilled I was to wake up and get ready for work.

Broadcasted on Threads:

The only things that are really cool in my company are my salary and me.

Funny tiring quotes

Funny tiring quotes are the perfect way to laugh through life’s exhaustion 😅✨ When your energy’s low but your humor’s high, these witty lines keep you smiling 😴😂 Whether you’re running on empty or just need a pick-me-up, get ready to chuckle at the relatable struggle of being hilariously drained 💥🤣 Keep scrolling for some seriously funny vibes that make tiredness feel a little less tiring! 🎉😆

New funny tiring quotes 👇

All funny tiring quotes & images can be used for free for non-commercial purposes 👌

Funny Quotes Collections
✨ New Funny Quotes

Social Media Stars ⭐

99 shares on Instagram this month:

Delightful if true: booby trap.

56 shares on Telegram this month:

Guy on the day of the 1918 armistice, walking around the trench, clapping, saying things like “Great work, everyone,” and “We did it, team.”

69 shares on Discord this month:

My mom always used to tell me that I look cute when I sleep. My boss has a different opinion.

81 shares on YouTube this month:

Every room can be a room with a view when I’m in it.

55 shares on TikTok this month:

How are they running out of oxygen if they’re breathing it right back into the submarine?

65 shares on Facebook this month:

We really grew up in the best era to be a kid, and the worst era to be an adult.

69 shares on YouTube this month:

People who are on Twitter and put intelligent in their bio, good one.

52 shares on Snapchat this month:

The sexiest woman you know is trying to maintain her balance between insanity and genius.

17 shares on Messenger this month:

Twitter is where the broken, the used, the fighters, and the lovers gather to appreciate the twisted beauty in one another.

92 shares on Messenger this month:

I think the most financially irresponsible thing I’ve done is get my kids to like sushi.

Trending Topics 📁

activity communication day food frustration fun humor i irony joke just know life love me media people procrastination relationship sarcasm social social media someone technology time want work

Hot Jokes 💥

20 folks are currently checking 👀

Wow, you have a very impressive collection of strange tendencies.

6 folks are currently checking 👀

I recently discovered “movies.” They’re usually like an hour and a half long, and a pretty good way to kill time. Check it out.

17 folks are currently checking 👀

“What’s your music taste?” Don’t know, man. If it sounds good, I’m adding it to the playlist.

14 folks are currently checking 👀

Stop dating if you have no car.

21 folks are currently checking 👀

Whispering to paramedic before I pass out: save me, but not enough that I have to go to work tomorrow.

19 folks are currently checking 👀

What if they close grocery stores and we have to hunt for our food? I don’t even know where the little gummy bears live.

9 folks are currently checking 👀

Unfortunately, it only strengthens my spirit when the summer people mourn their terrible season.

14 folks are currently checking 👀

Thought you guys should know this was only Monday. It’s also still Monday.

23 folks are currently checking 👀

I have now learned the moonwalk. It’s visually the coolest way to get fresh dog poop off the soles of your shoes.

13 folks are currently checking 👀

I prefer my weighted blanket in human form.

Funny Quotes Data 🤓

New Funny Quotes

calculating…

Funny Quotes Total

15,753

Funny Quotes Topics

17,766

Funny Quotes Images

15,753

Updated

Feb 3, 2026

Users Online

3,331

Activity Log ✨

Someone from 🇿🇦 has bookmarked:

Broke my work phone. I can’t talk on it anymore. I should have done this a long time ago.

Someone from 🇨🇾 has downloaded:

My biggest motivation for getting out of bed in the morning is knowing that I will eventually be able to get back in the bed.

Someone from 🇸🇧 has copied:

I don’t understand how spending more money than I earn is irresponsible. I’m giving more than I take. I’m generous.

Someone from 🇦🇬 has downloaded:

People who don’t have Twitter are trying to show you stuff you laughed at a month ago.

Someone from 🇱🇮 has bookmarked:

Thank you for contacting the abyss. Your scream is very important to us.

Someone from 🇮🇩 has copied:

Just once I’d like to hear a doctor say, “Your guess is as good as mine.”

Someone from 🇹🇭 has shared:

My most boomer complaint is that nobody knows how to bring an item out of courtesy to parties anymore.

Someone from 🇦🇬 has downloaded:

Once you understand why pizza is made round, packed in square boxes, and eaten as a triangle, then you will understand women.

Someone from 🇬🇹 has shared:

The only thing I don’t miss about the 90s is people smelling like cigarettes.

Someone from 🇧🇫 has bookmarked:

Sometimes I say something so embarrassing I even impress myself.

Social Media Log 💫

Seen just now on Threads:

Some people are like ads, just skip.

Seen just now on Threads:

AirPods are hungry for earwax. It’s your job to feed them.

Making waves on Telegram:

My superpower? I can look you dead in the face while you’re talking and not hear a damn word you said.

Spotted on Slack:

Post-standing clarity is like, damn, I could have been sitting this whole time.

Live now on WhatsApp:

I’m off to club bed, featuring DJ Pillow and MC Blanky.

Breaking via Discord:

Getting tipsy at a dimly lit restaurant with good conversation would heal me right now.

Going viral on Slack:

I kind of enjoy living in a world where I can end a conversation by simply not texting back.

Making waves on YouTube:

My role at Thanksgiving dinner is to Blair Witch it alone in the corner.

Seen just now on Telegram:

The older I get, the earlier it gets late.

Freshly posted on TikTok:

No more looking back in anger. It’s time to look forward in anger.

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