Wordgag ツ

10,000+ funny quotes

Activity Log ✨

Someone from 🇸🇾 has downloaded:

I’ve already broken all my resolutions and like four commandments.

Someone from 🇪🇪 has copied:

The nice thing about wintertime is that it’s darker for longer, so you see a lot less people.

Someone from 🇫🇮 has viewed:

The Masters would be a lot more interesting if there were starving alligators roaming throughout the golf course.

Someone from 🇲🇷 has downloaded:

There’s an app for the people who say they’re not seeking some form of validation here. It’s called a diary.

Someone from 🇮🇪 has copied:

If she says “it’s fine,” you’re probably in trouble.

Someone from 🇲🇽 has bookmarked:

Sometimes I apologize to my car when I hit a pothole.

Someone from 🇸🇳 has viewed:

Unfortunately, I wasn’t built for casual dating, I’m only built for intense soul crushing love at first sight.

Someone from 🇩🇯 has bookmarked:

The rumors of my will to live have been greatly exaggerated.

Someone from 🇲🇺 has shared:

There is no such thing as fun for the whole family.

Someone from 🇸🇾 has viewed:

Journaling was the most useless thing l ever attempted. Not only am I still suffering but now there’s evidence.

Funny Quotes Data 🤓

New Funny Quotes

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Funny Quotes Total

15,752

Funny Quotes Topics

17,765

Funny Quotes Images

15,752

Updated

Jan 19, 2026

Users Online

3,533

Social Media Log 💫

Just landed via Reddit:

I forgot to get milk, so Santa has a cup of Pepsi Max.

Just landed via Slack:

I’m tired of things costing money.

Going bananas on TikTok:

Social media has given everyone a chance to be heard, and it was a gigantic mistake.

Trending via YouTube:

Hear me out. What if we don’t elect another president, and we all just promise to be really good?

Spotted on WhatsApp:

Imagine giving someone your heart at Christmas, but the very next day they give it away. Haha, would feel so stupid.

Seen just now on TikTok:

You guys know your secrets are safe with me. It’s the people I share them with you can’t trust.

Breaking via Twitch:

Home is where the Wi-Fi connects automatically and no one chews loud.

Just landed via WhatsApp:

Trying to spend less time on my phone so I can get back to something I’ve loved since childhood: watching TV.

Seen just now on Slack:

I’m so hungry, I could eat a full-time job with health insurance.

Just shared via WeChat:

“I’m gonna decide everyone’s pronouns and sexuality tonight. And, yes, there will be some big surprises.”

154 Funny anything quotes

More funny anything quotes 👇

I wish I loved anything as much as people love to say they are “thrilled” on LinkedIn.

3 months ago

anything, enthusiasm, expression, humor, i, LinkedIn, love, media, much, people, sarcasm, say, social, social media, thrilled, wish, workplace
One week without chocolate. I can no longer hear anything in my left eye.

3 months ago

addiction, anything, chocolate, craving, eye, hear, humor, i, left, week
I’m so unpopular at school they call me “Batteries”. I’m never included in anything.

3 months ago

anything, battery, call, humor, included, joke, loneliness, me, never, school, unpopular
Pro tip: When you sign up for anything online, put the website’s name as your middle name. Now, when you receive spam, you will know who sold your data.

3 months ago

anything, data, data sale, data tracking, email, email spam, internet, internet security, know, middle, middle name, name, online, online signup, privacy, pro, pro-tip, put, sale, security, sign, signup, sold, spam, tip, tracking, website, website name, websites

For even more funny anything quotes, hit next 👇

All funny anything quotes & images can be used for free for non-commercial purposes 👌

Funny Quotes Collections

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Social Media Stars ⭐

28 shares on Telegram this month:

A camel walks into a bar and the bartender says, “Hey, you can’t bring your own drinks in here!”

59 shares on YouTube this month:

I never judge a book by its cover. People, though, I can tell are evil by their stupid faces.

33 shares on Discord this month:

I thought my friends in their 60s were making love in the other room but they were just putting on their socks.

47 shares on LinkedIn this month:

(While my wife opens up her Christmas present) Remember when you said we needed milk?

62 shares on X this month:

I need a horror movie where a kidnapper abducts a possessed child and finds out.

95 shares on Slack this month:

If at first you don’t succeed, the internet will let you know immediately.

86 shares on YouTube this month:

The lion does not concern himself with the few small drops of pee that got on his boxers at the urinal even after he did a few shakes to be sure.

18 shares on Reddit this month:

Sometimes you just need to eat shredded cheese straight out of the bag.

26 shares on WeChat this month:

Everything feels like thinking the stripper actually likes you.

28 shares on Snapchat this month:

Too poor for Ozempic but too undisciplined for strict diet and exercise. Is there a secret third option?

Activity Log ✨

Someone from 🇸🇰 has shared:

So many people say they love their Roomba, but you never see them set it free.

Someone from 🇮🇪 has viewed:

The one nice thing about your friends’ divorces is no one invites you to them.

Someone from 🇳🇮 has viewed:

My age is news to me every single time I remember.

Someone from 🇹🇴 has shared:

Bag of salad is the boxed wine of vegetables.

Someone from 🇧🇯 has copied:

Now that I have a standing desk, I’m adding manual labor to my resume.

Someone from 🇱🇾 has downloaded:

Meow means woof in cat.

Someone from 🇴🇲 has copied:

I would prefer not to.

Someone from 🇮🇪 has downloaded:

Not having to bring my backpack to the last day of elementary school was the last time I truly felt free.

Someone from 🇧🇿 has shared:

I only have one wish in life… For all my dreams to come true.

Someone from 🇧🇭 has copied:

An eye exam where the optometrist makes you read a menu under dim lights.

Social Media Log 💫

Just shared via Reddit:

A social media post so confusing you turn your music down to read it.

Trending via Facebook:

Dear Santa, I’ve been good all year. Most of the time. Once in a while. Never mind, I’ll buy my own stuff.

Freshly posted on YouTube:

“You should exercise for at least 30 minutes every day”. Okay, and how much if you’re not trying to go to the Olympics?

Spotted on Pinterest:

I identify as a McDonald’s ice-cream machine because I go down when you really want me.

Seen just now on Telegram:

Your Majesty” would be the best name for a cat.

Spreading quickly via Snapchat:

One thing nobody gives pigeons enough credit for is their ability to get out of the way on the sidewalk. A lot of you could learn a thing or two from them.

Spotted on Slack:

My two moods are eating a breakfast sandwich or wishing I was eating a breakfast sandwich.

Trending via Messenger:

Teens don’t know how good they have it with lyrics sites. We used to have to sing shit wrong for years until the truth destroyed us.

Just landed via Slack:

I love how my brain is like, “We’re not going to think about that,” and then thinks about only that.

Broadcasted on Slack:

I just start doing the Macarena when I want to end conversations now.

Wordgag ツ

Activity Log ✨

154 Funny anything quotes

More funny anything quotes 👇

I wish I loved anything as much as people love to say they are “thrilled” on LinkedIn.

One week without chocolate. I can no longer hear anything in my left eye.

I’m so unpopular at school they call me “Batteries”. I’m never included in anything.

Pro tip: When you sign up for anything online, put the website’s name as your middle name. Now, when you receive spam, you will know who sold your data.

All funny anything quotes & images can be used for free for non-commercial purposes 👌

Social Media Stars ⭐

Trending Topics 📁

Activity Log ✨