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10,000+ funny quotes

Activity Log ✨

Someone from 🇳🇵 has copied:

The real reason for global warming is that today’s young people are nowhere near as cool as we were back then.

Someone from 🇨🇫 has downloaded:

Girl dinner, but it’s the hearts of men who wouldn’t take ‘no’ for an answer.

Someone from 🇪🇷 has bookmarked:

Today I couldn’t find a parking space at work, so I drove back home. Looks like they have enough people there.

Someone from 🇺🇿 has bookmarked:

Never underestimate the healing power of having your bed to yourself.

Someone from 🇬🇲 has shared:

I bet once Bigfoot tries cheeseburgers, he’s gonna wanna hangout with us all the time.

Someone from 🇭🇺 has viewed:

Your soul is out of balance because you have fallen out of touch with your consumer demographic. Pay more attention to your personalized ads, let them flow through you.

Someone from 🇿🇲 has shared:

I come from a long line of people with something wrong with them.

Someone from 🇸🇹 has copied:

You can’t hurt me. You’re not how I look first thing in the morning.

Someone from 🇧🇪 has downloaded:

I stop myself at least twice a day from posting a status that would make everyone grab popcorn.

Someone from 🇦🇺 has viewed:

Commenting “This could be us” on her pics with her boyfriend.

Funny Quotes Data 🤓

New Funny Quotes

calculating…

Funny Quotes Total

15,753

Funny Quotes Topics

17,766

Funny Quotes Images

15,753

Updated

Feb 3, 2026

Users Online

3,375

Social Media Log 💫

Freshly posted on Telegram:

God doesn’t do nearly enough smiting anymore.

Going bananas on Twitch:

Working my first office job. Is it normal to have nothing to do?

Shared recently on LinkedIn:

“Hope you’re enjoying the sunshine!” No, I’m at a desk reading your email.

Spreading quickly via TikTok:

My toxic trait is thinking I deserve a vacation… while still on vacation.

Trending via YouTube:

Finding a person to make eye contact with during stupid meetings is essential to survival in the workplace.

Going viral on Snapchat:

Why did they call it an AI-generated picture and not a ‘fauxtograph’?

Making waves on Snapchat:

For as long as that song was, you’d think the Ghost Busters would have mentioned their phone number at least once.

Seen just now on Pinterest:

I’m going to break into your house and steal that thing with the little wheels on it under the plate in your microwave.

Freshly posted on Discord:

Rather than work on my issues, I’m counting on my personality getting changed by a falling coconut.

Spotted on Reddit:

My favorite thing to do is nothing.

Funny baked quotes

Funny baked quotes bring a sprinkle of laughter 🍪 and a dash of joy 🧁 to your kitchen adventures! Whether you’re a baking newbie or a flour-covered pro, these witty lines will rise to the occasion and sweeten your day 🍰. Get ready to giggle while you whisk, because baking has never been this amusing! 🎂😂

New funny baked quotes 👇

All funny baked quotes & images can be used for free for non-commercial purposes 👌

Random Funny Quotes

Social Media Stars ⭐

78 shares on Twitch this month:

Distance is my jam; solitude is my peanut butter.

34 shares on Pinterest this month:

I still get so surprised every time someone I find attractive finds me attractive. Like, are you sure?

42 shares on Instagram this month:

The only thing I know about AI is, it desperately wants us to have more fingers.

73 shares on WhatsApp this month:

There’s a reason you ain’t ever used your phone in a dream.

18 shares on Slack this month:

Welcome to your 50s, there’s a wrong way to stretch now.

67 shares on Telegram this month:

Emotions? No thanks. I’m trying to cut down.

67 shares on Messenger this month:

I love when the restaurant bathroom has different music playing than the restaurant. It’s like I’m going to Club Pee Pee.

83 shares on TikTok this month:

The ‘b’ in ‘subtle’ totally is.

87 shares on Instagram this month:

If I had today’s mind, I wouldn’t have made yesterday’s mistake. But if I hadn’t made yesterday’s mistake, I wouldn’t have today’s mind.

68 shares on TikTok this month:

WhatsApp shouldn’t just display “seen”, but also “lies” and “also writes with other girls”!

Trending Topics 📁

activity communication day food frustration fun humor i irony joke just know life love me media people procrastination relationship sarcasm social social media someone technology time want work

Hot Jokes 💥

10 folks are currently checking 👀

Every Jurassic Park movie should end with an insurance adjuster getting a phone call and immediately throwing up.

14 folks are currently checking 👀

Tailgating me while I’m going 90 in a 45 is crazy. And those red and blue lights on top of your car look stupid, btw, lol.

19 folks are currently checking 👀

One minute you’re young and fun, and the next, you’re turning down the stereo in your car to see better.

10 folks are currently checking 👀

Come on, brain, release the happy chemicals.

11 folks are currently checking 👀

Dear LOL, thanks for being there when I have nothing else to say.

25 folks are currently checking 👀

The best part about getting added to a group chat is leaving two weeks later.

8 folks are currently checking 👀

If you have gray in your beard, you can hit it.

14 folks are currently checking 👀

I miss the good ol’ days until I remember things like having to get out of my chair and smack the TV to get a clearer picture.

6 folks are currently checking 👀

Vacations are expensive, but how else could you put a price tag on your kids being ungrateful in a different city.

14 folks are currently checking 👀

This gratitude journal looks a lot like a grocery list.

Funny Quotes Data 🤓

New Funny Quotes

calculating…

Funny Quotes Total

15,753

Funny Quotes Topics

17,766

Funny Quotes Images

15,753

Updated

Feb 3, 2026

Users Online

3,285

Activity Log ✨

Someone from 🇲🇽 has shared:

Before you marry a person, you should first make them use a computer with slow internet to see who they really are.

Someone from 🇧🇴 has shared:

Just went to the Oreo website and hit “accept all cookies” … and now we wait.

Someone from 🇮🇸 has bookmarked:

Having little kids is great because I love spending hundreds of dollars each week to feed my floor and my trash can.

Someone from 🇳🇬 has viewed:

I see you liked my selfie, but what about my ideas?

Someone from 🇧🇳 has copied:

That looks like a problem for someone else.

Someone from 🇱🇻 has bookmarked:

If she reads Bukowski, she’s not looking for love. She’s looking for someone who will ruin her creatively.

Someone from 🇸🇩 has copied:

I talk to my dog like she’s human and, like most humans, she looks at me like I’m an idiot.

Someone from 🇰🇭 has viewed:

There’s only one way we’ll at least occasionally get normal elected officials and that’s if we pick them by random lottery.

Someone from 🇵🇰 has downloaded:

I haven’t bought 1 Christmas gift but I got 3 packages on the way for me though.

Someone from 🇸🇪 has downloaded:

Honestly, I don’t think I have any more new passwords left in me. You wanna steal my identity? Go ahead, I hope you enjoy debt and terrible posture.

Social Media Log 💫

Just shared via TikTok:

Why the hell is it called the restroom? I am fighting for my life in here.

Going viral on Telegram:

I don’t always seize the day. Sometimes I poke the day with my index finger and go, ew, ew, ew, ew.

Freshly posted on Pinterest:

I’m convinced a lot of people online are communicating from prison.

Broadcasted on Pinterest:

He was clicking his pen 137 times a minute, Your Honor.

Just shared via Twitch:

Call me old, but these days I just get excited to go home and lay down.

Spotted on Discord:

20s: LOL! 30s: OMG! 40s: WTF!

Making waves on Reddit:

Turning regret into ulcers since the day I was born.

Shared recently on LinkedIn:

“I asked ChatGPT”. I confided in Amazon. I confessed to McDonald’s. I have an inside joke with Exxon Mobil.

Spotted on YouTube:

Dads will insist the Masters is exciting while also napping through it.

Freshly posted on Facebook:

I appreciate the sun for always moving in the sky in a predictable way but I also respect the moon for just kind of doing whatever.

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Made with ❤️ in Sydney ☀️🌴