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10,000+ funny quotes

Activity Log ✨

Someone from 🇲🇹 has downloaded:

No one talks about the horrific event of meeting someone who is exactly your type.

Someone from 🇬🇲 has bookmarked:

Every time I leave the house, I’m reminded why sweatpants exist.

Someone from 🇭🇹 has bookmarked:

The week between Christmas and New Year’s should be studied as it is clearly a wormhole, disturbing time and space.

Someone from 🇿🇦 has shared:

Before they perfected the Q-tip, you have to wonder what kinds of horrific things went wrong with tips A-P.

Someone from 🇰🇷 has viewed:

One or the other, Lord – I can’t be broke and heartbroken.

Someone from 🇦🇫 has bookmarked:

My neighbor won’t stop talking about his Rolex and I can’t believe someone stole it tomorrow.

Someone from 🇸🇲 has copied:

I just sneezed into my elbow and now I’m waiting for a preschool teacher to praise me.

Someone from 🇰🇷 has copied:

I stopped adding “Let me know if you have any more questions!” to my emails because don’t email me again.

Someone from 🇨🇻 has viewed:

My keys fell in the snow, and now they’re gone forever — time to start a new life under a new name in a warmer climate.

Someone from 🇮🇷 has viewed:

When someone asks me what my dream job is, it’s just like “I don’t know dude, I don’t dream about jobs”

Funny Quotes Data 🤓

New Funny Quotes

299 this month

Funny Quotes Total

15,568

Funny Quotes Topics

17,624

Funny Quotes Images

15,568

Updated

Jan 11, 2026

Users Online

3,375

Social Media Log 💫

Trending via Facebook:

Boxes of pasta don’t need a plastic window. I believe pasta is in the box.

Making waves on LinkedIn:

If anyone wants to sponsor me, I’ll be running a 0.002K this weekend to raise awareness for laziness.

Just landed via Messenger:

HR: “Please complete our anonymous survey.” My boss then later: “Don’t forget the survey, HR said you are the last one from our team.”

Shared recently on Messenger:

It’s this time again when you have to choose between coffee and mulled wine in the morning.

Freshly posted on YouTube:

I once made a joke to a coworker, and she said, “It was the funniest thing I ever said,” and suggested I post it. It got 10 likes.

Just landed via Discord:

You can be anything. Be the person who ends the meeting early.

Just shared via X:

Who the hell keeps letting it be Monday again?

Going viral on WeChat:

December you will be good to me (threateningly).

Just shared via Slack:

I am deeply overwhelmed and yet incredibly bored at the same time.

Going bananas on Pinterest:

To-do list: bite the hand that feeds me, put all my eggs in one basket, kill two birds with one stone, let the cat out of the bag, think inside the box, burn bridges, walk on thin ice, play with fire.

Funny better person quotes

Funny better person quotes are the perfect way to laugh while leveling up your life! 😂💪 They remind us that personal growth doesn’t have to be serious all the time—sometimes a little humor is the best motivation. Whether you’re aiming to be kinder, wiser, or just less awkward, these witty nuggets will keep you smiling on your self-improvement journey. Ready to glow up with a grin? Let’s dive in! ✨😄

New funny better person quotes 👇

All funny better person quotes & images can be used for free for non-commercial purposes 👌

New Funny Quotes
🎲 Random Funny Quotes

Welcome to Wordgag! 😉✌️ Enjoy endless laughter with our collection of funny quotes guaranteed to crack you up. 😂💥

Social Media Stars ⭐

13 shares on Discord this month:

Sorry I can’t help you move, my hands are in permanent air quotes.

73 shares on Twitch this month:

There must be an opposite of suicide, where someone suddenly and radically decides to start living, and rescues their own life from meaninglessness.

15 shares on Slack this month:

(pausing the TV and turning to my kids) Now I want to talk to you guys for a second about what Bart just told that man to do.

62 shares on Twitch this month:

It’s scary when the washing machine spins really fast.

95 shares on Facebook this month:

Rewatching Avengers: Age of Ultron. Despite the title, they never tell you how old Ultron is.

63 shares on YouTube this month:

Let me help you turn that software into hardware.

17 shares on X this month:

Nobody rots in bed like I do.

54 shares on Slack this month:

The lion does not concern himself with Microsoft Teams.

63 shares on Discord this month:

Therapy isn’t gonna cut it, I need vengeance.

67 shares on Telegram this month:

I get you, bowel syndrome. I’m irritable, too.

Trending Topics 📁

activity communication day food frustration fun humor i irony joke just know life love me media people procrastination relationship sarcasm social social media someone technology time want work

Hot Jokes 💥

24 folks are currently checking 👀

My husband loves it when he orders fries, I say I don’t want any, and then I swoop in on his like a seagull at the beach.

12 folks are currently checking 👀

I see no action figures, puzzles, or board games. I thought you said you wanted to play with me.

21 folks are currently checking 👀

Not to brag but I always pick the slowest moving checkout line at the grocery store.

20 folks are currently checking 👀

Ever since I was a little girl, I knew I wanted to cancel plans.

21 folks are currently checking 👀

Shoulda named my daughter Calculus cause damn she’s complicated.

25 folks are currently checking 👀

Has anyone else noticed that it’s hard to do things when you don’t want to?

18 folks are currently checking 👀

Social media has given everyone a chance to be heard, and it was a gigantic mistake.

8 folks are currently checking 👀

My son got braces today. Yay, he’s not going to be a teenage dad.

24 folks are currently checking 👀

That was a nice hour long Twitter scroll. Feel much worse as always. See you guys tomorrow.

22 folks are currently checking 👀

I love all the Winter Olympic events, sliding downhill on a piece of wood, sliding downhill on two pieces of wood, sliding downhill in a piece of wood. All amazing.

Funny Quotes Data 🤓

New Funny Quotes

299 this month

Funny Quotes Total

15,568

Funny Quotes Topics

17,624

Funny Quotes Images

15,568

Updated

Jan 11, 2026

Users Online

3,507

Activity Log ✨

Someone from 🇲🇽 has copied:

Dear autocorrect, that’s not what I was trying to say. I’m getting tired of your shirt.

Someone from 🇦🇺 has shared:

They all cheat, lie and manipulate. Just pick the pretty one.

Someone from 🇵🇭 has bookmarked:

Twitter is the most fun you can have on the toilet.

Someone from 🇸🇴 has viewed:

Got thrown out of the grocery store for holding a rotisserie chicken up like Simba again.

Someone from 🇧🇿 has copied:

People who work in retail should be allowed to slap a customer or two each Christmas, as a little treat.

Someone from 🇵🇼 has bookmarked:

I enjoy excess, but only in moderation.

Someone from 🇧🇦 has downloaded:

If we hadn’t made them extinct, instead of Kung Fu Panda we could have had Tae Kwon Dodo.

Someone from 🇬🇩 has shared:

Shazam-ing a song in public feels the same as taking out a big hammer and bonking yourself on the head.

Someone from 🇭🇺 has bookmarked:

If you see me online, I’m not chatting. I’m busy ignoring the world and laughing at memes like it’s therapy.

Someone from 🇧🇦 has shared:

Going to McDonald’s to get the Grinch meal, then going to Burger King to get the Spongebob meal. Then disappearing into the forest for twenty years.

Social Media Log 💫

Making waves on Threads:

My husband is trying to convince me that we’re in a situationship. “The situation is that we live in the same house and love each other.”

Making waves on Slack:

I hate when an old man tries to friend me on Facebook and then I realize we went to high school together.

Seen just now on Reddit:

God sends you an only child as a friend to test you.

Going viral on WhatsApp:

My dentist plays country music, so it’s like a double torture.

Shared recently on WhatsApp:

If they cancel the Simpsons, we will no longer be able to see into the future.

Just landed via Facebook:

The dumbest person you know is being told, “You’re absolutely right!” by ChatGPT.

Trending via X:

I could have been the favorite mistress of the Sun King at Versailles, but nooooooooo I had to be born into late stage capitalism.

Seen just now on Facebook:

Dollar Tree need to just go ahead and change the name to Tree of Unexpected Prices.

Spotted on X:

Getting a random boner is a bit funny. Like, what is it, boy? What do you see?

Trending via WhatsApp:

I wish my hair had as much volume as my mouth.

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