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Funny fastest quotes

Funny fastest quotes zoom into your day with a burst of laughter and speed! ๐Ÿš€๐Ÿ’จ Whether you’re racing through life or just late for coffee โ˜•๏ธ, these witty words will have you giggling in the fast lane. Ready to sprint through some clever, speedy humor? Buckle up and enjoy the ride! ๐Ÿ˜‚๐Ÿ

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I’m officially at the age where my favorite thing to do is sit down.

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Haunted house idea: a poorly lit Walmart littered with people you haven’t seen since high school.

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Uber Eats โ€œyou forgot to finish your orderโ€ notification is funny because I didn’t forget, I just came to my senses.

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Unfortunately, you have to almost worship the ground I walk on for me to believe you’re into me.

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I need new friends. The old ones know too much.

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That bourbon chicken from the mall only tastes good on that toothpick. You order it, and itโ€™s not the same, I swear.

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Jewelry stores should just be like: Whether youโ€™re trying to be nice or trying to get laid, we got you covered.

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If you’re feeling a little uneasy about the state of global geopolitics, remember to spend as much time on your phone as possible. The more information you ingest as you scroll, the calmer you will become.

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I read somewhere on the internet that 87% of what you read on the internet isnโ€™t true, and I believe it.

9 folks are currently checking ๐Ÿ‘€

One of the voices in my head brought up an excellent point, so obviously he had to go.

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