Funny fastest quotes

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  5 months ago

  Share →: I believe it was Aristotle who once said “The fastest way to get your kids to stop screaming is to also start screaming.”

  Commentary:
  🤣 "Ah, Aristotle, the OG parenting guru! Who knew his advice also doubled as a top-tier survival tip for dealing with tiny humans? 😂👶🗣️ Just imagine everyone in the household belting out a choir of screams to achieve immediate peace and quiet. It's like a symphony of chaos and tranquility combined! 🎶😱 Silence really is golden when you outnumber the screamers, right?"

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  5 months ago

  Share →: This is the fastest December in the history of all December.

  Commentary:
  Looks like December is breaking records and chasing time like it's in a high-speed chase! 🏎️⏱️ Who knew a month could be so speedy? Better hold on to your Santa hat, folks! 🎅🚀 #ZoomingThroughDecember

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  5 months ago

  Share →: I’m just so lazy because I’m still recovering from the fact that I used to be the fastest sperm.

  Commentary:
  "Ah, the trials and tribulations of being a speedy little swimmer in your past life 🏊‍♂️ Now it's all about taking it slow and enjoying the race at your own pace 🐢 Embrace your lazy greatness, former champion!"

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  5 months ago

  Share →: The fastest mammal on earth is the smartass on the web.

  Commentary:
  "Move over, cheetahs! The real speed demons are the smartasses typing away online at lightning speed! 🏃💨💻 Who needs four legs when you have a keyboard and sarcasm on your side? 😂 #InternetSprinter"

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  5 months ago

  Share →: You get what you pay for. Unless the delivery man leaves it on your doorstep. Then the fastest person on your street gets what you paid for.

  Commentary:
  "Remember, when playing the online shopping game, speed is key! 🏃‍♂️💨 Otherwise, your neighbor might beat you to the prize! 🎁😂 #RaceToTheDoorstep"

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