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10,000+ funny quotes

Activity Log ✨

Someone from 🇧🇷 has bookmarked:

What’s my net worth? Buddy, I don’t own a net.

Someone from 🇲🇱 has shared:

If we start dating now, we could be arguing on a road trip by August.

Someone from 🇧🇼 has copied:

Graduation advice: Stay cool. Don’t be a fool. Avoid being a tool.

Someone from 🇩🇪 has copied:

I’ll never understand why the volume in movies is always mixed in such a way that you can barely understand the dialog and your neighbor gets war flashbacks during action scenes.

Someone from 🇻🇳 has shared:

Imagine how much better the world would be if everyone set aside their differences and came together as one to buy me a castle.

Someone from 🇼🇸 has shared:

Therapy is life letting you speak to the manager.

Someone from 🇳🇦 has copied:

Okay, I’ve proved I’m not a robot, now you prove you’re not a human.

Someone from 🇺🇬 has copied:

That bourbon chicken from the mall only tastes good on that toothpick. You order it, and it’s not the same, I swear.

Someone from 🇰🇿 has copied:

Who’s up thinking about the crushing weight of existence?

Someone from 🇲🇼 has downloaded:

My middle finger salutes you.

Funny Quotes Data 🤓

New Funny Quotes

41 this month

Funny Quotes Total

15,310

Funny Quotes Topics

17,437

Funny Quotes Images

15,310

Updated

Jan 2, 2026

Users Online

3,422

Social Media Log 💫

Making waves on TikTok:

And to think I survived a global pandemic for this.

Spotted on Discord:

Group projects in school weren’t meant to teach you teamwork, they were meant to teach you how to deal with the incompetence of your coworkers in the workplace.

Spotted on Snapchat:

I’m “I can’t sit like that for too long” years old.

Spreading quickly via TikTok:

Digging my own grave, because I gotta do everything around here.

Trending via Telegram:

I’ve taken a long, hard look at myself. I won’t be doing that again.

Seen just now on X:

A quick shoutout to all of the sidewalks out there… Thanks for keeping me off the streets.

Just shared via Facebook:

I remember when “disinformation” used to be called “lies.”

Going viral on WhatsApp:

Husband and I were blissfully happy for 25 years. Then we met.

Freshly posted on LinkedIn:

I would reset the clock on your microwave for you.

Seen just now on X:

Once again, I was not nominated for an Oscar this morning for acting my way through life.

Funny mob quotes

Funny mob quotes bring a hilarious twist to the world of gangsters and wise guys 🎩😂 Whether you’re into classic mob movies or just love clever one-liners with a punch 💥, these quotes add a sprinkle of humor to the underworld 🎭. Get ready to laugh out loud and see the lighter side of those tough-talking characters 😎🍕!

New funny mob quotes 👇

All funny mob quotes & images can be used for free for non-commercial purposes 👌

New Funny Quotes
🎲 Random Funny Quotes

Welcome to Wordgag! 😉✌️ Enjoy endless laughter with our collection of funny quotes guaranteed to crack you up. 😂💥

Social Media Stars ⭐

57 shares on Slack this month:

Is anyone else really scared for how stupid and illiterate the next generations are gonna be?

45 shares on Facebook this month:

If there’s one thing we can trust, it’s billionaires.

51 shares on X this month:

December you will be good to me (threateningly).

78 shares on Pinterest this month:

Rabbits jump and they live for 8 years. Dogs run and they live for 15 years. Turtles do nothing and live for 150 years. Lesson learned.

89 shares on Facebook this month:

Just overheard someone describe their hike as “it was like mountain climbing, but flat”.

68 shares on Pinterest this month:

Apparently, “spite” is not an appropriate answer to “What motivates you?”

81 shares on Discord this month:

I’m tired of pretending talking about the weather isn’t fun.

50 shares on YouTube this month:

I got a lot of Jedi advice for somebody who could be turned to the dark side by moderate traffic.

52 shares on TikTok this month:

Nothing ruins a Friday like realizing it’s only Wednesday.

73 shares on LinkedIn this month:

Don’t forget, you are someone’s weird colleague.

Trending Topics 📁

activity communication day food frustration fun humor i irony joke just know life love me media people procrastination relationship sarcasm social social media someone technology time want work

Hot Jokes 💥

24 folks are currently checking 👀

You can’t stop me. My tampon wrapper told me I was bold and brilliant.

25 folks are currently checking 👀

Auto-correct and I are in a toxic relationship.

23 folks are currently checking 👀

The rule should be: if you can smell the cookout, you’re invited to the cookout.

6 folks are currently checking 👀

It’s not true that I had nothing on. I had the radio on.

5 folks are currently checking 👀

I hate it when I gain 20 pounds for a role and then realize I’m not an actor.

15 folks are currently checking 👀

If a company’s hiring sign says, “Come grow with us,” you’re about to do the job of 3-5 people.

9 folks are currently checking 👀

I really understand why boomers text with ellipses between everything… it feels so good…

13 folks are currently checking 👀

In every imagination I have pictured myself in, I’m never poor.

10 folks are currently checking 👀

What no one ever considers is that the kids are pretending to believe in Santa for the sake of the parents.

23 folks are currently checking 👀

While the optimist and pessimist argued about the glass of water, the opportunist drank it.

Funny Quotes Data 🤓

New Funny Quotes

41 this month

Funny Quotes Total

15,310

Funny Quotes Topics

17,437

Funny Quotes Images

15,310

Updated

Jan 2, 2026

Users Online

3,674

Activity Log ✨

Someone from 🇲🇷 has viewed:

Teens be like, “This is the worst day of my life,” and it’s just that they were told to unload the dishwasher.

Someone from 🇳🇮 has viewed:

Another beautiful day without using sin, tan and cos.

Someone from 🇵🇰 has copied:

If a stranger starts talking to me in an elevator I say “I don’t want to talk in case we get stuck and I have to eat you” that usually shuts them up.

Someone from 🇬🇳 has shared:

If I was a fish, I’d be smoking all the seaweed.

Someone from 🇺🇦 has shared:

That place is so crowded; nobody goes there anymore.

Someone from 🇺🇸 has bookmarked:

Did you know that it’s actually possible to say, “I don’t know enough about this to have an opinion”?

Someone from 🇮🇶 has shared:

I was explaining to my Ukrainian colleague the phrase ‘There’s no such thing as a free lunch’. She told me the equivalent in Ukrainian is ‘The only free cheese is in the mousetrap’ — which is so much better.

Someone from 🇫🇲 has copied:

I skip questions on exams like I’m gonna be a different person when I come back to them.

Someone from 🇦🇱 has bookmarked:

The problem with hiding snacks from my kid is that when I forget, they end up being hidden from me too.

Someone from 🇿🇲 has bookmarked:

You are closer to the street than you will ever be to any billionaire.

Social Media Log 💫

Trending via Reddit:

What base is it when you’re flirting with a woman, and she asks, “Are you all right”?

Seen just now on WeChat:

Nothing makes me more stabby than when my husband ignores me and starts talking to the dog.

Going viral on WhatsApp:

It was the becestershire of times, it was the worcestershire of times.

Breaking via Telegram:

You’re supposed to store a treasure in your cleavage that’s why it’s called a chest.

Just shared via WeChat:

Today’s politics make me think we’re living in a movie where the villains actually win.

Just landed via TikTok:

There will always be miserable people inviting you to their misery.

Going viral on Slack:

Eleven out of ten people are stupid.

Making waves on Twitch:

By the time I remember to text back, it be too disrespectful to even do it.

Seen just now on LinkedIn:

I will marry a man who treats me delicately as if I’m a gift straight from heaven.

Freshly posted on Twitch:

Always be kind. You never know who has a pool.

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