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10,000+ funny quotes

Activity Log ✨

Someone from 🇨🇦 has shared:

I delete posts cause I be getting mature over the hours.

Someone from 🇱🇾 has shared:

Life is so boring when you don’t have a package on the way.

Someone from 🇰🇷 has shared:

Guys love being called “daddy” until the pregnancy test comes back positive.

Someone from 🇱🇾 has bookmarked:

Potato chips ARE vegetables! I exclaim as I tear open the third bag.

Someone from 🇿🇼 has downloaded:

We all have that person who insists on using a blanket on the couch, no matter the weather.

Someone from 🇱🇾 has bookmarked:

Yeah, baby, I am an animal in bed. More specifically a koala. I can sleep for 22 hours a day.

Someone from 🇸🇻 has bookmarked:

What must a pancake think when it’s being flipped? Doubtless something jolly.

Someone from 🇧🇷 has copied:

Flex on strangers by asking them if they remember you.

Someone from 🇸🇮 has shared:

The older I get, the more I don’t want to do things.

Someone from 🇫🇮 has downloaded:

Dear Santa, I’ve been good all year. Most of the time. Once in a while. Never mind, I’ll buy my own stuff.

Funny Quotes Data 🤓

New Funny Quotes

796 added this month

Funny Quotes Total

10,958

Funny Quotes Topics

13,929

Funny Quotes Images

10,958

Updated

24 minutes ago

Users Online

3,436

Social Media Log 💫

Seen just now on LinkedIn:

Headed to a wedding but my wife said I’m not allowed to refer to the bride as ‘the veiled threat.’

Spotted on Pinterest:

I’m pretty sure my husband’s favorite sound is the oven range fan turning on when I start making dinner.

Shared recently on X:

The fact that I have a lot of wine in the house proves that I don’t drink much. Otherwise the wine would be gone.

Trending via X:

Being social sucks all my energy.

Freshly posted on Messenger:

Monday morning looks like Jack Nicholson breaking through the door in The Shining.

Going viral on Telegram:

When I was young, I was afraid of the dark. Now, these bills got me afraid of the light.

Seen just now on Telegram:

A massage is not enough, I need to be rolled through a pasta machine.

Spotted on Messenger:

Weird how I can’t seem to reach anything at the grocery store when hot men are around.

Trending via Threads:

I’m waiting for the perfect moment to stop procrastinating.

Seen just now on X:

If you want to be sure that you never forget your wife’s birthday, just try forgetting it once.

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Welcome to Wordgag! 😉✌️ Enjoy endless laughter with our collection of funny quotes guaranteed to crack you up. 😂💥

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activity communication day food frustration fun humor i irony joke just know life love me media need people procrastination relationship sarcasm social someone technology time want work

Funny Quotes Data 🤓

New Funny Quotes

796 added this month

Funny Quotes Total

10,958

Funny Quotes Topics

13,929

Funny Quotes Images

10,958

Updated

24 minutes ago

Users Online

3,434

Funny Quotes of the Month 🚀

Funny Quotes of the Year ⭐

Activity Log ✨

Someone from 🇰🇭 has shared:

What if all the ancient Greek sculptures are actually victims of Medusa?

Someone from 🇱🇾 has downloaded:

Does everyone have that one colleague at work who puts you in a bad mood just by looking at them?

Someone from 🇰🇷 has downloaded:

Called in, “I’m a time traveler. I came in today yesterday.”

Someone from 🇻🇨 has bookmarked:

You’re all badass until that dust bunny in the corner is a real spider.

Someone from 🇲🇲 has viewed:

Roses are red, violets are blue. Your parents are very disappointed in you.

Someone from 🇦🇸 has downloaded:

Why do women complain about size but moan when fingered?

Someone from 🇹🇲 has shared:

I think during winter we should also get to work less hours in a day, just like the sun.

Someone from 🇰🇳 has viewed:

Flex on strangers by asking them if they remember you.

Someone from 🇰🇪 has bookmarked:

Life is so boring when you don’t have a package on the way.

Someone from 🇸🇲 has viewed:

Before ball parks were invented there was pretty much no way to give someone a rough estimate.

Social Media Log 💫

Freshly posted on X:

There’s no filter on my pics or my thoughts. I’m just out here raw-dogging it.

Broadcasted on Reddit:

Three words no parent ever wants to hear when dropping their kid at a play date: “Come on in.”

Just shared via Telegram:

I’ve broken all my New Year’s Resolutions so now I’m moving on to laws of nature.

Just landed via Threads:

I don’t know about you guys, but when I have to make a decision I analyze the situation, evaluate the risk, take measures to limit the consequences and then I completely screw up.

Trending via Discord:

There are 400 billion stars in our galaxy and perhaps two trillion galaxies in total, and I just wonder if Miss Universe fully understands her achievement.

Making waves on YouTube:

The older I get, the more I don’t want to do things.

Making waves on Pinterest:

I’m not saying I need glasses. But today I watched a bunny in a meadow until it flew away.

Going viral on Pinterest:

Olympic gymnast: does the most amazing thing I have ever seen in my entire life. Announcer: Oh dear, that will be a point deduction.

Spreading quickly via WhatsApp:

I bought a little bag of air today. The company that made it was kind enough to put some potato chips in it as well.

Seen just now on Instagram:

Not sure if “life hack” exactly, but I fell down the stairs and now my whole family is being so nice and catering to my needs.

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