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10,000+ funny quotes

Activity Log ✨

Someone from 🇰🇳 has shared:

Adulting is realizing you can’t skip work like you skipped school.

Someone from 🇵🇬 has shared:

She wanted me to impress her in the bedroom, so I showed her my organized sock drawer and my fresh matching bedding.

Someone from 🇧🇯 has viewed:

Unknown numbers will call me, then expect me to talk first. Welcome to the breathing competition.

Someone from 🇬🇦 has bookmarked:

I have three full closets of nothing to wear.

Someone from 🇩🇲 has bookmarked:

Starting to think I’m single because of everyone else’s shortcomings.

Someone from 🇸🇩 has shared:

Real introverts are too introverted to tell people they’re introverts.

Someone from 🇸🇮 has bookmarked:

I’m never really sure what to do with my hands when I go jogging, so I don’t go jogging.

Someone from 🇧🇩 has shared:

If you’re doing Dry January, please, please, keep it to yourself. Nobody cares, and you’re probably even more boring without alcohol.

Someone from 🇫🇮 has copied:

Cholesterol has a special place in my heart.

Someone from 🇹🇭 has shared:

Stop eating around the bush or whatever the saying is.

Funny Quotes Data 🤓

New Funny Quotes

1890 added this month

Funny Quotes Total

12,052

Funny Quotes Topics

14,836

Funny Quotes Images

12,052

Updated

4 minutes ago

Users Online

3,430

Social Media Log 💫

Spotted on WeChat:

All the observable evidence suggests that, if I was much worse at my job, I’d be more likely to get a promotion to senior management.

Trending via WhatsApp:

You don’t have to write every day to be a writer! You just have to feel guilty every day that you don’t.

Trending via WhatsApp:

You never know how strong you are until someone’s story runs more than 5 minutes long.

Going viral on Reddit:

Welcome to your 40’s: oh you like surprises? here’s another chin. Surprise!

Going viral on Facebook:

Love when plans get canceled. It’s like getting a snow day as an adult.

Trending via Discord:

And then there are people who can only sleep on their back because their pea brain could slip out of their ear if they lie on their side.

Seen just now on Reddit:

After 30, an all-nighter is not getting up to pee.

Shared recently on Messenger:

My life coach traded me.

Making waves on Discord:

You know you’re getting old when you can’t walk past a bathroom without thinking, “I may as well go while I’m here.”

Just shared via X:

Man, these end times are taking forever.

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Funny social expectations quotes

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Welcome to Wordgag! 😉✌️ Enjoy endless laughter with our collection of funny quotes guaranteed to crack you up. 😂💥

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Funny Quotes Data 🤓

New Funny Quotes

1890 added this month

Funny Quotes Total

12,052

Funny Quotes Topics

14,836

Funny Quotes Images

12,052

Updated

4 minutes ago

Users Online

3,453

Funny Quotes of the Month 🚀

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Activity Log ✨

Someone from 🇷🇺 has viewed:

One thing no one mentions about being an adult is how much time you debate with yourself over keeping a cardboard box because it’s a really good box.

Someone from 🇩🇿 has downloaded:

Am I just getting old or are people getting more annoying?

Someone from 🇹🇩 has shared:

Jump to recipe is the closest thing we have to teleportation.

Someone from 🇸🇰 has copied:

Going to the beach the day after watching Jaws hits different.

Someone from 🇲🇰 has copied:

Waffles are just pancakes with convenient boxes to hold your syrup.

Someone from 🇱🇹 has bookmarked:

Don’t ruin a good sundress by wearing panties.

Someone from 🇩🇴 has viewed:

I don’t need Halloween. I have strange characters around me all year round.

Someone from 🇹🇿 has viewed:

I love to see “pan-fried” on a menu. I hate food that’s fried in a shoe.

Someone from 🇪🇨 has copied:

I find it hard to believe I used to just answer my phone when it rang. No caller ID. No idea who was calling. Just picked it up and said “hello” like a goddam daredevil.

Someone from 🇹🇯 has viewed:

I used to have this mental illness, where I thought logical arguments would change someone’s mind.

Social Media Log 💫

Just landed via Slack:

For those who don’t want Alexa listening in on your conversations, they’re making a male version that doesn’t listen to anything.

Going viral on LinkedIn:

Do beavers even know what they’re doing, or do they just see water flowing down a river and think, “Absolutely not”?

Just landed via Slack:

The most attractive thing a man can do is hitting his own head and repeating “stupid, stupid, stupid”.

Just shared via X:

He died doing what he did best, trying to get a croc to wear a Croc.

Trending via X:

She’s a 10, but she says ‘Orwellian’ when it’s clearly ‘Kafkaesque”.

Just shared via Telegram:

The 5 seconds in the morning, when I don’t yet know who I am, is the best time of the day.

Shared recently on X:

How is every author the #1 New York Times bestseller?

Freshly posted on Snapchat:

Did anyone ask the daylight if it wanted to be saved?

Seen just now on Telegram:

During arguments with idiots, I wish I could throw a flash bang and disappear.

Going viral on X:

Fish must think we look so weird with both eyes on the front of our face.

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