Commentary:
Oh, so you're the zoo's wild card, huh? 🦁🐒 Better keep a close eye on this one, folks! Don't let them near the keys to the cages or we might have a real-life Animal Kingdom situation on our hands! 🗝️🦓🐍🤪 #AnimalLiberationAtAnyCost
95 Funny trust quotes
Sometimes I do something completely out of character, like say no to a slice of pizza, or trust someone.
Commentary:
"Turning down a slice of pizza?! Now that's just unbrielievable! 🍕 But trusting someone? That's next-level unpredictability, let's hope it's not a pizza-delivery guy! 🤣 #lifechoices"
Don’t tell me to trust my gut. Thats where I put my snacks. Clearly that’s where I’m the weakest.
Commentary:
"Who needs intuition when you can have a full stomach of snacks instead? 🍟 Trusting your gut might lead to some tasty decisions, but let's keep it focused on the snacks, not life choices! 😂"
The reason I don’t trust polls is because the people being polled are people who willingly answer the phone when an unknown number is calling them.
Commentary:
"Can we really trust the accuracy of polls when they rely on the bravery of those willing to answer the call of the unknown number? 📞😂 Who knows, maybe the key to a more accurate poll is to start telemarketing our survey questions instead! 🤔📊 #DialingForData"
Promising I won’t tell anyone your secret doesn’t include my husband. He’s basically my diary.
Commentary:
"Promising not to spill the tea, unless my hubby is listening! 🤫📖 Who needs a diary when you have a live journal at home, am I right? 😂 #MarriageSecrets"
Long distance relationships can work if the four of you all truly trust each other.
Commentary:
"Ah yes, the classic setup for a successful long-distance relationship: you, your partner, trust, and oh yes, the mysterious fourth person… 🕵️♂️👫🤔 Let's hope they're trustworthy too!"
So apparently if they ask “do you trust me?”, replying with “well, I trust you to be you” is the incorrect response.
Commentary:
"Ah, the classic 'do you trust me?' test – a true gambit of relationships! 🤔 Responding with 'well, I trust you to be you' might guarantee honesty, but it also comes with a free side of awkwardness and a dash of sass! 😆 Remember folks, sometimes it's better to just smile and nod… 😅"
My bank assures me my money is safe with them, yet they keep their pens chained to desks and most of them are missing.
Commentary:
"Looks like the pens are the real precious assets at that bank! 🖊️💰 Maybe the pens are off on a vacation, spending all that safe money somewhere sunny… 🌴😎 Just don't let them draw on your bank account balance!"
Cheers to all who skipped that one dish at Thanksgiving because you just didn’t trust the person who brought it.
Commentary:
🦃🤢 When in doubt, always trust your gut and skip that mystery dish! Let's raise a glass to those who looked out for their own well-being at Thanksgiving 🍷👏 #TrustNoPotluck
I will never give another woman my heart until I see how she acts when a bee flies at her.
Commentary:
"I will never give another woman my heart until I see how she acts when a bee flies at her." 🐝🚫💔
Because let's face it, how someone handles a bee encounter says a lot about their true character! 😂🙌 #BeeBraveryRequired