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10,000+ funny quotes

Activity Log ✨

Someone from 🇫🇲 has copied:

My bathroom mirror after a long party weekend: “Girl, those vitamins can’t help you now.”

Someone from 🇨🇻 has copied:

“Thug life,” I whisper to myself as I check out my sunglasses in the mirror.

Someone from 🇹🇿 has bookmarked:

Goodnight to the men who know one woman is enough. The rest can get sleep paralysis.

Someone from 🇾🇪 has downloaded:

Being married means mostly shouting “What?” from other rooms.

Someone from 🇷🇼 has bookmarked:

I see stand-up comedy as a stepping stone to television. A few more paid gigs and I’ll be able to afford a television.

Someone from 🇸🇳 has bookmarked:

Have you ever “accidentally” eaten a family sized bag of chips?

Someone from 🇲🇻 has downloaded:

Opening a Star Wars pub called Bar Bar Binks.

Someone from 🇲🇹 has copied:

If you knock down a policeman, they’ll get backup.

Someone from 🇳🇪 has bookmarked:

Who’s up thinking about the crushing weight of existence?

Someone from 🇳🇿 has downloaded:

Haircuts should be covered by healthcare.

Funny Quotes Data 🤓

New Funny Quotes

2327 added this month

Funny Quotes Total

12,489

Funny Quotes Topics

15,192

Funny Quotes Images

12,489

Updated

38 minutes ago

Users Online

3,445

Social Media Log 💫

Seen just now on Reddit:

I’ve reached the age where my train of thought often leaves the station without me.

Live now on Telegram:

It’s a little ironic when you consider that the Internet was invented to save time.

Breaking via Facebook:

Always be kind. You never know who might own a jacuzzi.

Just shared via YouTube:

I highly recommend having hobbies. It distracts you from things like falling in love.

Just landed via Threads:

I think some outfits just aren’t meant to be worn unless you’re getting straight into a car.

Spotted on Slack:

Women who don’t check a man’s phone will still use their intuition and dreams to find out if he’s cheating.

Trending via WeChat:

I’m gonna put “CEO of Blockbuster Video” on my resume because who are they gonna call to confirm?

Spreading quickly via LinkedIn:

I’m always in a rush to go home, and do absolutely nothing.

Seen just now on Facebook:

I won’t bore you with my problems because all of my problems are fascinating.

Going viral on Threads:

It’s Sunday. I’ve slept in and ignored church. Somewhere the devil is sitting and clicking on “Like”.

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Welcome to Wordgag! 😉✌️ Enjoy endless laughter with our collection of funny quotes guaranteed to crack you up. 😂💥

Trending Funny Quotes 📈

Hot Funny Quotes 🔥

Trending Topics 📁

activity communication day food frustration fun humor i irony joke just know life love me media people procrastination relationship sarcasm social social media someone technology time want work

Funny Quotes Data 🤓

New Funny Quotes

2327 added this month

Funny Quotes Total

12,489

Funny Quotes Topics

15,192

Funny Quotes Images

12,489

Updated

38 minutes ago

Users Online

3,439

Funny Quotes of the Month 🚀

Funny Quotes of the Year ⭐

Activity Log ✨

Someone from 🇵🇱 has bookmarked:

Ctrl Alt delete my fat.

Someone from 🇳🇷 has downloaded:

If evolution really works, how come mothers only have two hands?

Someone from 🇦🇴 has viewed:

The most embarrassing thing in the world is when you make a fool of yourself in front of a baby and it doesn’t laugh.

Someone from 🇹🇬 has copied:

Moms be like, “Your cousin’s neighbor’s husband’s aunt died. Just thought you should know.”

Someone from 🇲🇳 has downloaded:

Aliens are coming to Earth, people are going to the Moon, and I am still pushing on a door that says pull.

Someone from 🇹🇱 has bookmarked:

It takes guts to be an organ donor.

Someone from 🇲🇪 has viewed:

Normalize mouthing the lyrics to the song in your headphones in public.

Someone from 🇾🇪 has shared:

Bold of me to constantly use the phrase “no worries!” when I am, in fact, constantly full of many worries.

Someone from 🇺🇾 has copied:

It’s a little ironic when you consider that the Internet was invented to save time.

Someone from 🇭🇺 has shared:

“I’m like Sisyphus but with dishes. Dishyphus.”

Social Media Log 💫

Going viral on X:

And now begins the yearly tradition of writing the incorrect year on everything, for the next 3 months.

Spotted on YouTube:

My nickname in high school was “who?”

Just landed via Pinterest:

Thanks to AI, some of us went from being told by our parents not to trust the internet to having to tell our parents not to trust the internet.

Freshly posted on Reddit:

People at the library need to learn how to be quiet. Some of us are trying to beatbox over here.

Going viral on Pinterest:

I am the human version of tangled headphones.

Broadcasted on TikTok:

Relationship status: the black mold in my shower thinks I’m cute.

Shared recently on TikTok:

I made coffee and carried it to the couch. I’ve done everything I had planned for this Sunday.

Just landed via Discord:

I want him in ways that are deeply deeply upsetting to modern feminism.

Shared recently on Threads:

I am “We read the newspaper front to back every single day,” years old.

Reported on Messenger:

Actors in black and white movies were often putting their lives in danger during driving scenes, as they weren’t able to tell if the traffic light was red or green.

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