Wordgag ツ

10,000+ funny quotes

Activity Log ✨

Someone from 🇺🇿 has downloaded:

I just sneezed into my elbow and now I’m waiting for a preschool teacher to praise me.

Someone from 🇲🇰 has downloaded:

You have never experienced true fear until a poster falls off the wall in the middle of the night.

Someone from 🇬🇪 has shared:

More candlelight, less gaslight, babe.

Someone from 🇧🇼 has viewed:

I listen to a lot of white noise, so I get really excited when it rains or someone turns on a fan. It’s like seeing my favorite band live.

Someone from 🇸🇧 has bookmarked:

My problem areas are my upper arms and earth.

Someone from 🇧🇳 has bookmarked:

How is a plant not able to handle direct sunlight? You’re from outside.

Someone from 🇲🇬 has copied:

True friends don’t judge each other, they judge other people… together.

Someone from 🇦🇬 has downloaded:

Did you know 17 muscles are activated when you’re crying? Fitness is my passion.

Someone from 🇬🇧 has viewed:

I’m going to hell if anybody needs anything.

Someone from 🇨🇿 has downloaded:

Fun like a LinkedIn notification.

Funny Quotes Data 🤓

New Funny Quotes

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Funny Quotes Total

15,753

Funny Quotes Topics

17,766

Funny Quotes Images

15,753

Updated

Feb 3, 2026

Users Online

3,573

Social Media Log 💫

Trending via Threads:

Agriculture can’t possibly be a dying industry. Bot farms are booming.

Making waves on WhatsApp:

It’s almost bed time, so I’ll just check my e-mail, Twitter, Instagram, Facebook, and watch a season of my favorite show on Netflix real quick.

Freshly posted on Discord:

Why does tiredness on the couch not follow me to the bed?

Just landed via YouTube:

Does everyone in the world want to come to my house tomorrow?

Just shared via WhatsApp:

Everything’s under control. I just don’t know whose.

Spreading quickly via YouTube:

I don’t wanna brag, but I’ve been told I’m micro-management material.

Trending via YouTube:

You got beef with me, but none in your fridge. That’s why you’re mad. You’re hungry.

Going bananas on Pinterest:

WFH is so great until you realize you’ve walked about 17 steps all day.

Going bananas on Facebook:

How come it’s called “thrift store shopping” instead of Goodwill hunting?

Spreading quickly via Reddit:

A little time spent not acting your age is never a bad thing.

Jane Austen gave us men who crossed fields in the rain. Mine left me on read, and liked someone else’s story.

1 month ago

Witty quote about romantic disappointment and modern dating humor, playful and relatable.

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Commentary:
Guess I'm waiting for a modern Mr. Darcy to pop up in my DMs instead of just popping up in my notifications 😂📱📖

austen, dating, ghosting, humor, jane, Jane Austen, left, left on read, man, me, media, men, mine, rain, read, relationship, social, social media, someone, story, us

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Social Media Stars ⭐

54 shares on Facebook this month:

Situationships are just you pretending you’re okay with getting used until they find someone they actually like.

99 shares on Discord this month:

I always bring luggage when visiting my mom because I know she’ll send me on a guilt trip.

68 shares on Reddit this month:

Sometimes I glance over at my boyfriend, and he’s just looking at Google Maps, scrolling around.

17 shares on YouTube this month:

I intend to live forever. So far, so good.

90 shares on Facebook this month:

If I block you and you email me, you’re getting another chance.

70 shares on Snapchat this month:

Three wise men? I highly doubt that.

64 shares on Slack this month:

Every day Facebook tells me I have memories and wants to show them to me. It’s like they have no appreciation for the cost or the amount of liquor I needed to erase them.

98 shares on Telegram this month:

Where do I see myself in 5 years? Here, but fatter.

77 shares on Instagram this month:

I start each day assuming it will be horrible and go from there.

14 shares on Messenger this month:

Another year? But the last one got such bad reviews.

Activity Log ✨

Someone from 🇬🇦 has downloaded:

I’m so good at sleeping that I can do it with my eyes closed.

Someone from 🇫🇲 has downloaded:

There are 8 billion people in the world and I only have 3 friends, and one is annoying.

Someone from 🇴🇲 has bookmarked:

My first rodeo and my last rodeo were the same rodeo.

Someone from 🇻🇳 has shared:

Normalize mouthing the lyrics to the song in your headphones in public.

Someone from 🇩🇿 has bookmarked:

To the guy who invented zero, thanks for nothing.

Someone from 🇨🇳 has downloaded:

Told my girl I’m tired of her dramas and she bought me an energy drink.

Someone from 🇧🇧 has copied:

As long as I can dip something in something, I’m happy.

Someone from 🇪🇸 has copied:

My mother always told me, “If you don’t have anything nice to say, say nothing at all.” Needless to say, I’m not much of a conversationalist.

Someone from 🇿🇼 has bookmarked:

They say time is the solution to every problem. I’ve been waiting for five hours already and the room is still messy.

Someone from 🇹🇬 has shared:

It’s lowkey nothing else to do except become a better version of yourself, lol.

Social Media Log 💫

Seen just now on Snapchat:

If cartoons have taught us anything, it’s the uselessness of little umbrellas when plummeting from a cliff.

Shared recently on Instagram:

I always carry a knife with me in case I run into someone with 10,000 spoons.

Freshly posted on Facebook:

Can’t stop thinking about that time at the planetarium where they showed us a picture of earth and everyone booed.

Making waves on Snapchat:

I love going “Streets are saying” before I say something I literally just made up.

Going viral on Slack:

Every time a bird poops on my car, I eat a plate of wings on the front porch to show them what I’m capable of.

Shared recently on Slack:

Breaking a heart is considered bad, but melting a heart is somehow good.

Going bananas on Instagram:

I’m the person who requested weather reporters stand in the storms. I have no concept of wind or rain and love seeing needless suffering.

Just shared via Discord:

Wild that we could have been foraging for berries and dying off at 33, but we chose this nonsense instead.

Just shared via WhatsApp:

You haven’t experienced proper anger until you have a sister.

Trending via WhatsApp:

Anytime someone comments on my weight, I try to ignore them and keep my chins up.

Wordgag ツ

Activity Log ✨

Jane Austen gave us men who crossed fields in the rain. Mine left me on read, and liked someone else’s story.

Has anyone noticed what it’s beginning to look a lot like?

Welcome to your 40s. You now pay for 7 streaming services, only use 4 and can’t remember the password to any of them.

I just looked over at my new shoes and the box says “vegan”. I’ve never had to feed my other shoes before.

Imagine if we had to worry about dinosaurs too, on top of everything else.

Diet day #1: All the unhealthy food has been removed from the house. It was delicious.

Social Media Stars ⭐

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Activity Log ✨

Wordgag ツ

Activity Log ✨

Jane Austen gave us men who crossed fields in the rain. Mine left me on read, and liked someone else’s story.

Keep the laugh going 😂

Has anyone noticed what it’s beginning to look a lot like?

Welcome to your 40s. You now pay for 7 streaming services, only use 4 and can’t remember the password to any of them.

I don’t text. I will contact you telepathically.

I just looked over at my new shoes and the box says “vegan”. I’ve never had to feed my other shoes before.

Imagine if we had to worry about dinosaurs too, on top of everything else.

Diet day #1: All the unhealthy food has been removed from the house. It was delicious.

Social Media Stars ⭐

Trending Topics 📁

Activity Log ✨