Wordgag ツ

10,000+ funny quotes

Activity Log ✨

Someone from 🇮🇷 has bookmarked:

Born to say “Who the hell raised you to be this stupid.” Forced to work in groups.

Someone from 🇧🇬 has shared:

I’m 6 donuts away from being the elephant in the room.

Someone from 🇿🇼 has bookmarked:

Whoever first said, “I’m in a pickle,” must have had the weirdest day.

Someone from 🇹🇼 has shared:

Went outside. Touched grass. Got bit by bugs. Zero stars.

Someone from 🇧🇳 has bookmarked:

The sun is so successful because it has the perfect bedtime and morning routines.

Someone from 🇰🇭 has bookmarked:

I remember when a computer didn’t automatically connect to the internet, it used to make a screaming noise. We should have listened.

Someone from 🇵🇹 has viewed:

I don’t argue with my kids anymore. I just vacuum every surface of the living room while they’re trying to watch TV.

Someone from 🇱🇧 has shared:

I’m waiting for the perfect moment to stop procrastinating.

Someone from 🇧🇦 has downloaded:

89% of the time when my husband tells me I look great, what he really means is, “We needed to leave five minutes ago.”

Someone from 🇱🇮 has downloaded:

Please stop adding touchscreens to cars. Most of these idiots can barely drive as it is.

Funny Quotes Data 🤓

New Funny Quotes

0 this month

Funny Quotes Total

15,269

Funny Quotes Topics

17,387

Funny Quotes Images

15,269

Updated

Dec 31, 2025

Users Online

3,728

Social Media Log 💫

Going viral on Facebook:

True friends don’t judge each other, they judge other people… together.

Going bananas on Snapchat:

God bless the student essay that is so confused and rambling, there is zero chance that they used AI.

Making waves on Snapchat:

I’m really glad that light only attracts insects. Imagine wild boars would come knocking at your windows all the time.

Freshly posted on LinkedIn:

Asking women for sex just to end the conversation.

Shared recently on Discord:

Sure, my internet service is overpriced and spotty but you can’t put a price on unintentionally being dropped from every Zoom meeting.

Shared recently on Twitch:

There’s nothing like sitting by an open fire and watching the evidence burn.

Shared recently on Pinterest:

Let’s play a game called you bring me food and I eat it.

Spreading quickly via Reddit:

It’s curious how kids are always really hungry right before dinner and right after dinner, but never during actual dinner.

Making waves on Instagram:

My parents think they know me.

Making waves on Twitch:

Vote for me and I will halve the calories in chocolate.

August is almost over. September is next week. Time to pick out a Halloween costume and start your Christmas shopping. Happy New Year, everybody.

4 months ago

Download image ↓

Commentary:
Guess I better start prepping for beach season as well! 🎃🎄🍾🏖️ Time travel, anyone?

almost, August, Christmas, Christmas shopping, costume, Halloween, Halloween costume, happy, holiday, holiday planning, humor, management, new, new year, next, over, pick, planning, seasonal, seasonal humor, September, shopping, start, time, time management, week, year

Trending Funny Quotes 👇

Do y’all ever think about how, in Korean, you can’t scream over text because there’s no uppercase… I think about that all the time, for some reason.

0

2 months ago

communication, ever, humor, i, Korean, language, over, reason, scream, text, think, time, uppercase
It’s so funny how you can meet someone randomly online, and they become such an important part of your life. It’d be nicer if they lived closer, though.

0

5 months ago

closer, connection, distance, friend, friendship, Funny, humor, important, life, lived, meet, meeting, nicer, online, online friend, someone
According to the amount of bacon I just cooked, I’m 4 people.

0

2 months ago

bacon, cooking, food, humor, i, just, meal, people, portion
I’m the product of too much television and zero supervision.

0

2 months ago

entertainment, humor, irony, leisure, much, product, self-deprecating, supervision, television, too, zero
You should be able to like an email instead of replying to it.

0

3 months ago

able, button, communication, email, humor, like button, media, productivity, reply, replying, should, social, social media, technology
Paw Patrol is just annoying. Exactly how long do dogs live again on average?

0

2 months ago

again, annoying, children’s, children’s shows, dogs, exactly, humor, just, life, life span, live, patrol, paw, PAW Patrol, pets, shows, span

New Funny Quotes

🎲 Random Funny Quotes

Welcome to Wordgag! 😉✌️ Enjoy endless laughter with our collection of funny quotes guaranteed to crack you up. 😂💥

🎉🥂 New Year Quotes

Social Media Stars ⭐

27 shares on TikTok this month:

Sharing wired earphones is a forgotten form of intimacy.

28 shares on Messenger this month:

If you don’t buy any snacks, you’re proud for a moment and then incredibly sad.

92 shares on Pinterest this month:

“I’m giving my daughter a male name, ain’t nobody cracking an Abdul.”

49 shares on YouTube this month:

My car accidentally drove to a burger shop again. I hate when it does that.

51 shares on YouTube this month:

Next time you think I am flirting with you, ask yourself if kindness is so rare in your life that you mistake it for desire.

59 shares on Discord this month:

With great power comes a great electricity bill.

38 shares on WeChat this month:

Remind the demons under your bed that you’re the landlord, raise the rent.

56 shares on TikTok this month:

A bridesmaid, but to carry the end of my CVS receipt.

53 shares on TikTok this month:

I only went to medical school to figure out where your arms are supposed to go when you sleep and they didn’t even teach us that.

85 shares on Telegram this month:

I’m so single, I have no one to drunk text.

Activity Log ✨

Someone from 🇱🇺 has viewed:

This Christmas, get her the gift that’ll last a lifetime. Give her a tortoise.

Someone from 🇭🇷 has shared:

People shouldn’t be at the grocery store the same time as me. Get out of the way.

Someone from 🇨🇬 has downloaded:

It’s that time of year again where I go to random restaurants to tell random women, “So this is why you cancelled our date?”, while they’re out with their significant others.

Someone from 🇰🇷 has shared:

Probably the worst thing about the death of print media is the devastating effect it’s having on the producers of traditional ransom notes.

Someone from 🇸🇬 has viewed:

I have everything you could possibly ever need in my purse, except for money.

Someone from 🇪🇬 has copied:

I made up all these romantic scenarios in my brain and you’re not following the script.

Someone from 🇿🇼 has copied:

Maybe aliens don’t visit us because they’re all women and they want us to make the first move.

Someone from 🇹🇩 has viewed:

Men be like, “You’ve been different ever since I disrespected you.”

Someone from 🇨🇲 has viewed:

Welcome to your 50s. If you don’t have a mysterious ailment, one will be assigned to you shortly.

Someone from 🇦🇬 has copied:

Good morning. May your day be as beautiful as I am.

Social Media Log 💫

Going bananas on Twitch:

A dating app for people who are shy called Mumble.

Seen just now on X:

Forgot how fun it is to post IG stories. I feel like a female filmmaker.

Live now on WeChat:

Fun fact: the creator of Barbie and the creator of Hot Wheels were husband and wife.

Just shared via Twitch:

I’m only awake because my coffee needs me.

Trending via Messenger:

I was waiting on the universe but the universe was actually waiting on me.

Just shared via Discord:

She’s probably just not using her phone right now for the first time ever in her whole life.

Making waves on Facebook:

What a strange day. And it has been for years.

Breaking via LinkedIn:

Relationship status: I love my bed.

Going bananas on Snapchat:

Job interviewer: Where do you see yourself in 5 years? Me: I would say my biggest weakness is listening.

Freshly posted on Facebook:

I think it’s extremely important, especially in the morning, to be quiet.

Wordgag ツ

Activity Log ✨

August is almost over. September is next week. Time to pick out a Halloween costume and start your Christmas shopping. Happy New Year, everybody.

Related Funny Quotes 🤝

Do y’all ever think about how, in Korean, you can’t scream over text because there’s no uppercase… I think about that all the time, for some reason.

It’s so funny how you can meet someone randomly online, and they become such an important part of your life. It’d be nicer if they lived closer, though.

According to the amount of bacon I just cooked, I’m 4 people.

I’m the product of too much television and zero supervision.

You should be able to like an email instead of replying to it.

Paw Patrol is just annoying. Exactly how long do dogs live again on average?

Social Media Stars ⭐

Trending Topics 📁

Activity Log ✨