Wordgag ツ

10,000+ funny quotes

Activity Log ✨

Someone from 🇹🇿 has downloaded:

My body is a vessel for various dips.

Someone from 🇰🇪 has copied:

People in 1999 were using the Internet as an escape from reality. People today are using reality as an escape from the Internet.

Someone from 🇩🇴 has downloaded:

I’ll see you in your nightmares.

Someone from 🇫🇲 has viewed:

Concert tickets should be 75% off if the artist is really super special to you.

Someone from 🇭🇺 has bookmarked:

The marriage rate has been trending downward. Choreographed wedding dances may be the reason.

Someone from 🇪🇸 has copied:

Al guys are like, “We can’t use it to cure cancer, but we can suck all the joy and purpose out of life so that dying isn’t sad.”

Someone from 🇹🇹 has shared:

None of this matters and we are all going to die. Have a great weekend!

Someone from 🇮🇳 has bookmarked:

I made you something special for Mother’s Day, my kid threatened.

Someone from 🇾🇪 has copied:

Waking up has backfired on me so many times.

Someone from 🇲🇬 has downloaded:

I modeled my morning routine on the humble rooster. Wake up, scream, wander around.

Funny Quotes Data 🤓

New Funny Quotes

calculating…

Funny Quotes Total

15,753

Funny Quotes Topics

17,766

Funny Quotes Images

15,753

Updated

Feb 3, 2026

Users Online

3,471

Social Media Log 💫

Seen just now on Snapchat:

Anxiety should have a loyalty rewards program.

Making waves on X:

Toddlers are like puppies, they don’t care if they’re dirty and smelly and they both have an affinity exploring the trash bin.

Trending via Slack:

I’m awake and working. Please respect my privacy during these trying and emotional times.

Spreading quickly via TikTok:

I exaggerated on my job application and said I wanted to work for a living.

Freshly posted on Discord:

I didn’t lose an hour of sleep. The hour of sleep lost me.

Live now on Telegram:

Never lie to Indian girls. That red dot be recording everything.

Shared recently on YouTube:

I commented to a friend that I didn’t know how goofy Scream was. It turns out I have never seen Scream. I saw Scary Movie.

Broadcasted on Slack:

My last husband’s name is Don. I just added an E to it and walked away.

Breaking via Twitch:

I don’t want to adult anymore. Don’t even want to be human. I want to be a goat. Jump around randomly, eat what I want, and head-butt anyone who annoys me.

Trending via TikTok:

Nothing humbles me faster than my phone camera accidentally turning on.

Funny attract quotes

Funny attract quotes are the perfect way to charm and chuckle your way into someone’s heart 😄💫 Whether you’re looking to break the ice or just sprinkle some humor into your day, these witty lines bring smiles and good vibes every time 😂💖 Get ready to boost your charm with a dash of laughter and lighthearted fun! 🎉✨

New funny attract quotes 👇

All funny attract quotes & images can be used for free for non-commercial purposes 👌

Funny Quotes Collections
✨ New Funny Quotes

Social Media Stars ⭐

25 shares on YouTube this month:

Deleting university to focus on Twitter.

49 shares on YouTube this month:

Tattoos: because being an adult is hard, and I deserve to have stickers.

85 shares on TikTok this month:

I would prefer not to.

29 shares on Facebook this month:

Humans were not meant to have this many passwords.

62 shares on Threads this month:

“Dress for the job you want, not for the job you have” is all well and good until you’re rocking a tutu.

17 shares on Reddit this month:

I like waiters. They bring a lot to the table.

56 shares on Messenger this month:

You cannot hurt me. You are not a hip-height table corner.

74 shares on Reddit this month:

If, I, want to, put, a comma, there, then, I will put, the comma, there.

77 shares on Facebook this month:

I keep all my valuables near the front door so if burglars breaks in during the night they will not wake me up.

72 shares on Telegram this month:

The thing about Pink Floyd is they take a little while to start singing.

Trending Topics 📁

activity communication day food frustration fun humor i irony joke just know life love me media people procrastination relationship sarcasm social social media someone technology time want work

Hot Jokes 💥

21 folks are currently checking 👀

Sometimes I wonder what happened to the people who asked me for directions.

5 folks are currently checking 👀

Lady just asked me what “mansplaining” is. I think it’s a trap. We’ve been staring at each other in silence for half an hour.

24 folks are currently checking 👀

SHEIN does entirely too much on their app. Feels like a freaking casino every time you open it.

10 folks are currently checking 👀

“Machines will soon be as smart as people.” Ok, but which people?

16 folks are currently checking 👀

We are talking about how beautiful and cool you are behind your back.

15 folks are currently checking 👀

The goal is never Gucci bags. It’s acres of land.

25 folks are currently checking 👀

Pinterest is so therapeutic. There’s no drama, no one to argue with. Just pretty pictures.

13 folks are currently checking 👀

It’s hard to believe that this long, crazy election will finally be over in a few months.

20 folks are currently checking 👀

If I say, “First of all,” run away, because I have prepared peer-reviewed research, data, and charts, and I will destroy you.

17 folks are currently checking 👀

The Velvet Underground probably wouldn’t have been so influential if I was at their shows with a giant magnet and pulled their guitars out of their hands.

Funny Quotes Data 🤓

New Funny Quotes

calculating…

Funny Quotes Total

15,753

Funny Quotes Topics

17,766

Funny Quotes Images

15,753

Updated

Feb 3, 2026

Users Online

3,281

Activity Log ✨

Someone from 🇹🇴 has bookmarked:

Make your salad taste better by putting it between bread, meat, cheese, and Big Mac sauce.

Someone from 🇱🇺 has copied:

One of my biggest fears during a zombie apocalypse is having to sleep without a fan.

Someone from 🇨🇻 has bookmarked:

I hate to brag but I excel at my faults.

Someone from 🇯🇲 has viewed:

Just heard my knee crack so loud I expected it to glow in the dark.

Someone from 🇬🇼 has viewed:

I used to be a person who couldn’t easily fall asleep, then I got divorced and now I sleep like a baby. Probably unrelated.

Someone from 🇩🇰 has downloaded:

It’s strange being the same age as old people.

Someone from 🇸🇷 has shared:

If you want to feel really bad about yourself, just start dating.

Someone from 🇨🇷 has copied:

I wish people had mute buttons in real life.

Someone from 🇲🇭 has copied:

New challenge called “don’t say ‘wow it’s already dark by five these days’ for the rest of winter”

Someone from 🇰🇿 has downloaded:

IKEA products should be cheaper, I’m doing all the work here. It’s like ordering takeout food and still having to cook it when it arrives.

Social Media Log 💫

Just landed via Threads:

I want time to sit and read, take a nap and snack. Basically, I want to be in Kindergarten.

Spotted on Facebook:

“Tom Cruise does his own stunts!” Okay cool, but so do I.

Freshly posted on YouTube:

“You’re like if 9 a.m. on a Monday was a person.”

Making waves on Reddit:

Manifesting you in my bed.

Spotted on Telegram:

It’s important to post stupid stuff so you can learn who likes you.

Making waves on Threads:

Hey, you wanna come to a wedding with me? You could be the groom.

Broadcasted on X:

I have never read a Hacker News thread where any of the commenters seemed as if their life contained joy.

Going viral on WeChat:

Becoming an adult was the worst thing I’ve ever done.

Going viral on Pinterest:

In a relationship with my bedroom fan.

Just shared via Messenger:

Nobody will know you’re stoned if you’re always stoned.

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