Funny certainty quotes

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  4 months ago

  Share →: Only two things are certain: death, and Princess Diana’s face on at least one grocery store magazine.

  Commentary:
  "Ah, the eternal truths of life: death will come knocking, and Princess Diana's radiant face will always grace the magazine aisles, reigning supreme! 👑💀📰 #ForeverRoyal"

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  6 months ago

  Share →: All I know for sure is that I could be wrong.

  Commentary:
  "So, if I'm not right, then I must be wrong… but then again, I could be wrong about that too! 🤷‍♂️ Who knew being wrong could lead to such philosophical conundrums? 😄"

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  6 months ago

  Share →: There are a few certainties in this life: death, taxes and when a Canadian tells you it’s cold out, it’s cold out.

  Commentary:
  "Ah, the infamous Canadian weather report: 'It's a bit nippy, eh?' ❄️🍁 While most certainties may be grim, at least Canada keeps us on our toes by reminding us that cold is relative! 🥶 #CanadaEh"

  Fun Fact or Trivia:
  Did you know that Canada has its own temperature scale called the "Windchill Index"? It measures how cold the wind makes it feel, taking into account factors like wind speed and air temperature! 🇨🇦❄️

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  6 months ago

  Share →: There are three certainties in life: death, taxes and getting stuck behind a shit driver when you’re late.

  Commentary:
  "Ah, the Holy Trinity of life's certainties: death, taxes, and the oddly reliable appearance of the world's slowest driver just when you're in a rush 🚗⏰. It's like they have a secret GPS tracker tuned into your stress levels!"

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  Jan 20, 2025

  Share →: With great power comes the absolute certainty that you’ll turn into a right douche.

  Commentary:
  "Ah, the classic cautionary tale of power and douchery 🤣💪 Remember, with great power comes great responsibility… and the strong possibility of turning into a bit of a douchebag along the way! Proceed with caution, my powerful friends! 😉✨"

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