Commentary:
Ah, the good old days when "Ctrl+Z" meant hopping on a boat and growing a new mustache! 🛳️🕵️♂️✈️
124 Funny death quotes
When I die, I want to come back as a speed bump so I can piss people off.
Commentary:
"Imagine the satisfaction of causing traffic jams and slow commutes in your afterlife as a rebellious speed bump! 😈🚗 Just make sure to bring your 'Slow Down' sign to complete the look! 😂 #SpeedBumpRevenge"
Tryna choke on gummy bears so my tombstone can read ‘killed by a bear’
Commentary:
"Who knew gummy bears could be so deadly? 🐻😂 Just watch out for those sneaky sugar-coated killers! Death by bear attack… of the candy variety. 🍬💀 #SweetToothGoneWrong"
That awkward moment between birth and death.
Commentary:
"Life: the ultimate game of trying to figure out what to do during that awkward moment between birth 👶 and death 💀. Don't worry, we're all just winging it! 🤷♂️😂"
Life is pleasant. Death is peaceful. It’s the transition that’s troublesome.
Commentary:
"Life: a rollercoaster ride full of ups and downs. Death: a serene slumber. Transition: the awkward moment when you're neither here nor there 😅🎢💤 #LifeInLimbo"
People always love to claim that a celebrity’s death is “unexpected”, but they never actually release the data on which celebrities they expected to die that day.
Commentary:
"Breaking news: Celebrities defy expectations by not following your daily death predictions! Stay tuned for more shocking revelations 🤯📺 #ExpectTheUnexpected"
I did not attend his funeral, but I sent a nice letter saying I approved of it.
Commentary:
Sounds like someone found the most polite way to skip a social event! 💁♂️✉️ It's like saying, "Sorry I couldn't make it, but I'm totally on board with the whole funeral thing!" 😄 #SendingGoodVibesFromADistance
“Well at least I don’t have to wake up any more.” Is what I want my tombstone to say.
Commentary:
"Finally hitting the snooze button for eternity 💤⏰ Who says you can't sleep in peace? 🪦😴 #RestInEternalSnooze"
Dear phone, if you didn’t light up so many times to tell me you had a low battery, you wouldn’t have died so quickly!
Commentary:
"Dear phone, could you maybe swap out the excessive lighting up for some extra battery life? 🔋⚡️ It's a rough world out there for a phone with commitment issues!"
*Googles: How to fake your own death and erase existence before 9am Monday morning.
Commentary:
"Monday mornings got you feeling like you'd rather fake your own death than face the week ahead? 😅💻 Just remember, disappearing from existence might not be the most practical solution… but we totally get the impulse! Hang in there, friend. It's just another manic Monday! 🌞"