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10,000+ funny quotes

Activity Log ✨

Someone from 🇨🇲 has copied:

A lot of men actually do forgive cheating, as long as their homies don’t know.

Someone from 🇵🇬 has bookmarked:

The Netflix “Recommended For You” list is why I have trust issues.

Someone from 🇳🇿 has downloaded:

A true friend is someone who thinks you’re a good egg, even though they know you’re slightly cracked.

Someone from 🇸🇨 has shared:

If you wear enough cardigans, people will assume you’re smart and you can stop reading entirely.

Someone from 🇱🇸 has bookmarked:

Imagine she’s home alone, bored out of her mind, and she STILL won’t put that laundry away. She is me.

Someone from 🇹🇳 has copied:

Taking a walk: The most effective debugging tool.

Someone from 🇨🇷 has shared:

Men become instantly more attractive when they wear aviators; it’s science.

Someone from 🇸🇪 has viewed:

Why would I put money where my mouth is when wine exists?

Someone from 🇧🇧 has downloaded:

Some of these fake tans look like an old Tupperware container that’s had marinara sauce in it.

Someone from 🇦🇩 has downloaded:

My cat and I talked it over and no we don’t think that I’m crazy.

Funny Quotes Data 🤓

New Funny Quotes

calculating…

Funny Quotes Total

15,753

Funny Quotes Topics

17,766

Funny Quotes Images

15,753

Updated

Jan 31, 2026

Users Online

3,467

Social Media Log 💫

Just shared via Pinterest:

If I eat a magnet, will I become more attractive?

Freshly posted on Messenger:

Dear God, thank you for the job I have. But if you have a lottery win planned for me, I’m ready! Thank you.

Shared recently on Discord:

Turns out “V for Vendetta” is not an educational movie and it won’t teach your kids the alphabet.

Broadcasted on WhatsApp:

Ugh, but profoundly.

Just shared via X:

Everything will kill you so pick something fun.

Making waves on Facebook:

My dating era has come to an end. I’d like to thank those who participated.

Seen just now on WhatsApp:

I talk to myself mostly because I am an excellent listener.

Spotted on WhatsApp:

“Life is a marathon, not a sprint.” Cool, I dislike both of those things.

Breaking via Instagram:

I was going to do some yoga today, but had a donut instead.

Live now on Instagram:

You’re never too old or too stupid to become older and stupider.

Funny deaths quotes

Funny deaths quotes 💀😂 bring a lighthearted twist to a serious topic, turning the end into something to chuckle about! Whether you’re looking to break the ice, add a dash of dark humor, or simply enjoy clever wordplay, these witty sayings will tickle your funny bone while reminding us life’s too short not to laugh. Ready to embrace the humor in the inevitable? Let’s dive in! 🎉🕺

New funny deaths quotes 👇

All funny deaths quotes & images can be used for free for non-commercial purposes 👌

Funny Quotes Collections
✨ New Funny Quotes

Social Media Stars ⭐

100 shares on Snapchat this month:

Blocking someone isn’t enough, I also want them to get lice.

35 shares on Pinterest this month:

Now I understand why old people sit outside just to sit outside.

85 shares on TikTok this month:

Me: Maybe it’s the weed talking but your apartment seems enormous. IKEA Manager: Sir.

47 shares on WeChat this month:

This post ain’t gonna like itself, damn.

50 shares on Slack this month:

I want whatever the people who run at 6 a.m. have.

60 shares on Instagram this month:

I’m sorry for the things I said when I was running late due to circumstances completely within my control.

17 shares on Facebook this month:

If I were a bird, you’d be the first person I’d shit on.

51 shares on LinkedIn this month:

If at first you don’t succeed then skydiving definitely isn’t for you.

29 shares on X this month:

Eleven out of ten people are stupid.

54 shares on WeChat this month:

You can tell a lot about someone based on which Spice Girl they were most attracted to.

Trending Topics 📁

activity communication day food frustration fun humor i irony joke just know life love me media people procrastination relationship sarcasm social social media someone technology time want work

Hot Jokes 💥

21 folks are currently checking 👀

Those who still fit in their wedding dresses years later haven’t been making enough effort eating.

16 folks are currently checking 👀

A guy in the parking lot saw me trip over my own feet so I yelled to him “I just quantum leaped into this body!”

5 folks are currently checking 👀

Ground beef implies the existence of sky beef.

20 folks are currently checking 👀

Technically mixed martial arts can include tickle fighting.

13 folks are currently checking 👀

Putting sunscreen on kids feels like cardio.

14 folks are currently checking 👀

Did you know that if you listen to any Black Sabbath album backwards, you can hear them singing backwards?

11 folks are currently checking 👀

All women want is to consistently annoy one handsome man forever.

18 folks are currently checking 👀

I’m no Hobbit, but I do often walk blindly into some rather dodgy situations.

11 folks are currently checking 👀

I’m not lazy, I’m waiting for inspiration to hit me… should be here any time now.

15 folks are currently checking 👀

Last night the Internet stopped working so I spent a few hours with my family. They seem like good people.

Funny Quotes Data 🤓

New Funny Quotes

calculating…

Funny Quotes Total

15,753

Funny Quotes Topics

17,766

Funny Quotes Images

15,753

Updated

Jan 31, 2026

Users Online

3,532

Activity Log ✨

Someone from 🇼🇸 has bookmarked:

Spotify Wrapped isn’t enough, I want an Excel spreadsheet of my listening habits.

Someone from 🇲🇽 has downloaded:

I started calling the new guy at work “Grok” because he thinks he knows everything.

Someone from 🇹🇼 has shared:

I’m not flirting with you. I’m just funny and you think you like me.

Someone from 🇰🇼 has shared:

Instead of studying, I like to stay on my phone and worry about how I’m going to pass.

Someone from 🇹🇼 has viewed:

I think I’ll just let my jazz hands speak for themselves.

Someone from 🇵🇹 has copied:

I’m already excited about who I’m going to think sucks first today.

Someone from 🇺🇿 has bookmarked:

Do people with lip filler know that they look like that?

Someone from 🇦🇱 has downloaded:

Sometimes I shower in the dark and pretend I’m in a rainforest on an alien planet.

Someone from 🇨🇲 has shared:

I’m shocked it offended you, I was certain someone was gonna need to explain it to you.

Someone from 🇫🇮 has downloaded:

Love crawling into bed like it’s a spa retreat, only to wake up like I survived a bar fight.

Social Media Log 💫

Just shared via Discord:

Explaining myself is too much work, just judge me.

Live now on Discord:

Take me back to the night we met so I can never give you a chance.

Freshly posted on Pinterest:

Just did a seductive hair flip and an onion ring flew out.

Just shared via Twitch:

Depression is embarrassing because sometimes it makes you miss appointments and not return phone calls, and when the fog starts to lift, you gotta do a whole bloody apology tour.

Going bananas on WeChat:

Where can one find a sugar daddy? Asking for a friend.

Shared recently on Pinterest:

Throwing someone under the bus sounds hard, let’s just sell ’em down the river and call it a day.

Making waves on Snapchat:

Follow your heart, but take your brain with you.

Shared recently on TikTok:

I won’t bore you with my problems because all of my problems are fascinating.

Just landed via Reddit:

My reality check bounced, guess I’ll have to stay insane for the time being.

Going bananas on WhatsApp:

I’m quitting my job to do topless tarot readings on the beach.

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