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10,000+ funny quotes

Activity Log ✨

Someone from 🇹🇱 has bookmarked:

Every morning I regret why I didn’t sleep earlier the night before.

Someone from 🇳🇴 has shared:

If my fingers don’t motion like scissors snipping when I ask for a haircut at the salon, how will they know what I mean?

Someone from 🇳🇪 has viewed:

When I say someone is a good doctor, it’s entirely based on the strength of their waiting room Wi-Fi.

Someone from 🇧🇷 has shared:

Prison pen pal doesn’t want us to write each other anymore. Finds my life too depressing.

Someone from 🇴🇲 has copied:

Sorry for zoning out, bro. It’s just, I’ve been having a bad day for several years.

Someone from 🇸🇲 has copied:

I hate when I lose things at work, like pens, papers, sanity and dreams.

Someone from 🇱🇾 has bookmarked:

People say that they want to be tall, but don’t realize how many times tall people are assaulted by spiderwebs.

Someone from 🇷🇺 has copied:

Being a dinosaur sounds kinda nice. No bills, no work, just extinct.

Someone from 🇲🇺 has shared:

Microdosing hell by checking the web every day.

Someone from 🇮🇱 has shared:

Polar bears drinking Coca Cola is my favorite holiday vibe.

Funny Quotes Data 🤓

New Funny Quotes

240 this month

Funny Quotes Total

15,509

Funny Quotes Topics

17,577

Funny Quotes Images

15,509

Jan 7, 2026

3,422

Social Media Log 💫

Trending via Reddit:

The haters said I couldn’t do it. And the haters? They were right. They were correct. They even nailed the small details, frankly it’s amazing.

Making waves on Facebook:

Let’s build a fort with blankets and pillows, and just stay in it all day.

Going bananas on Facebook:

If you’re thinking what I’m thinking, you need professional help.

Broadcasted on Discord:

According to autocorrect, my favorite Star Wars character is Bob’s Feet.

Making waves on WhatsApp:

If I say “with all due respect,” nothing respectful is about to come out of my mouth.

Broadcasted on Facebook:

You wish you had this many chins.

Just landed via Slack:

You cannot go outside for a year or two. Come back, and the same people still be outside in the same places.

Breaking via X:

My daughter asked me what it’s like to be a parent, so I woke her up at 3 AM to let her know that I couldn’t sleep.

Freshly posted on WhatsApp:

If this meeting were any slower, it’d be a landscape painting.

Trending via Pinterest:

I read classics because my FOMO is making me want to understand every reference ever.

Funny digestive quotes

Funny digestive quotes are the perfect recipe to lighten up those tummy troubles! 😂💨 From bloated moments to unexpected gurgles, these witty lines turn digestion disasters into laugh-out-loud stories. Whether you’re dealing with a noisy belly or just love a good food pun, get ready to chuckle and embrace the quirks of your digestive system with a smile! 🍕💥🤣

New funny digestive quotes 👇

Nobody warns you of the devastation two days of stuffing will bring upon your digestive system.

0

2 months ago

bring, consequences, days, devastation, digestive, digestive system, food, holiday, humor, indulgence, nobody, stuffing, system, warning

Someone from 🇾🇪 has recently bookmarked this quote.

94 shares on Messenger this month.
Laxatives help you live up to your full pooptential.

0

2 months ago

digestive, full, health, help, humor, joke, laxatif, live, pooptential

Someone from 🇱🇷 has recently shared this quote.

83 shares on YouTube this month.
With age comes wisdom. And digestive trouble.

0

2 months ago

age, aging, digestive, digestive trouble, health, humor, lessons, life, life lessons, trouble, wisdom

Someone from 🇸🇰 has recently bookmarked this quote.

45 shares on LinkedIn this month.

All funny digestive quotes & images can be used for free for non-commercial purposes 👌

New Funny Quotes

🎲 Random Funny Quotes

Welcome to Wordgag! 😉✌️ Enjoy endless laughter with our collection of funny quotes guaranteed to crack you up. 😂💥

Social Media Stars ⭐

84 shares on Instagram this month:

You want me to sit in the back seat? The thing that killed JFK?

46 shares on Facebook this month:

The trash gets picked up tomorrow. Be ready.

50 shares on Pinterest this month:

Sometimes I say something so embarrassing I even impress myself.

23 shares on Facebook this month:

I do all my own stunts, but never intentionally.

61 shares on WeChat this month:

No, no, I’m listening, it just takes me some time to process so much stupidity all at once.

34 shares on WeChat this month:

Sometimes I get really mad at myself, but not like mad enough to fight myself or anything like that.

42 shares on Telegram this month:

The difference between us is that people can peck you and I’m impeccable.

29 shares on Messenger this month:

The laundromat should give you XP and ranks like “Slimelord” and “Glunkfather,” based on how dirty your clothes are.

83 shares on Discord this month:

They should invent a food that sounds good for dinner tonight.

65 shares on Twitch this month:

I like liking Instagram stories because I like pressing buttons.

Trending Topics 📁

Hot Jokes 💥

11 folks are currently checking 👀

I talk to myself in the same condescending tone, so you’re not special.

10 folks are currently checking 👀

Ironically people who are good at giving advice find it difficult to follow their own.

13 folks are currently checking 👀

You can generate images with your mind whenever you want. You don’t even need AI.

13 folks are currently checking 👀

Mayor of a small town is such a wild job. It’s like being the president of a country where you went to high school with the whole population.

17 folks are currently checking 👀

We don’t make people walk the plank like we used to.

16 folks are currently checking 👀

Just realized John the Baptist and Winnie the Pooh have the same middle name.

23 folks are currently checking 👀

I’m shocked it offended you, I was certain someone was gonna need to explain it to you.

17 folks are currently checking 👀

Accordion to current studies, 90% of you did not realize that this sentence started with a musical instrument.

15 folks are currently checking 👀

Can you imagine how awkward it would be if your pet went on your phone and found the 1,000 pictures you have of them sleeping.

7 folks are currently checking 👀

Squirrels get most of their energy from chewing on powerlines, that acorn thing is just for show.

Funny Quotes Data 🤓

New Funny Quotes

240 this month

Funny Quotes Total

15,509

Funny Quotes Topics

17,577

Funny Quotes Images

15,509

Updated

Jan 7, 2026

Users Online

3,452

Activity Log ✨

Someone from 🇮🇶 has viewed:

I always figure it out on my own, I just need to panic first.

Someone from 🇸🇬 has bookmarked:

If I was God, I would’ve equipped women with venom glands.

Someone from 🇲🇾 has copied:

Ancestors survived five mass extinctions on earth for me to be killed by a house cat I was trying to put a Christmas sweater on.

Someone from 🇬🇹 has shared:

Forget pheromones, barbecue smells are always attractive.

Someone from 🇴🇲 has shared:

A moth flies into your face out of nowhere. You could ask him why he does that, but what would you do with the information?

Someone from 🇵🇹 has viewed:

If it weren’t for the last minute, I’d never do anything.

Someone from 🇭🇹 has viewed:

Drinking through a straw is the opposite of snorkeling.

Someone from 🇮🇪 has viewed:

I wanna be a jellyfish— no heart, no brain, no feelings, no pain— just blub blub blub.

Someone from 🇵🇪 has copied:

Having a daughter is like having a little broke best friend who thinks you’re rich.

Someone from 🇦🇱 has downloaded:

Thoughts more intrusive than a 90s sitcom neighbor.

Social Media Log 💫

Going bananas on TikTok:

At some point in life, you graduate from Family Guy to American Dad.

Just shared via Snapchat:

Shy with a mean resting face is a crazy combo.

Going viral on Telegram:

Some say the world will end in fire. Others say in ice. Coming up next, our expert panel breaks down the arguments for each side…

Broadcasted on YouTube:

I found out my wife was cheating on me at a Red Hot Chili Peppers concert, and I don’t ever wanna feel like I did that day.

Seen just now on YouTube:

I love being wrong, it’s just like being right except easier and I get to be stupid, which is my favorite thing.

Making waves on Twitch:

I can’t tell if I need coffee, a hug, or to just go live in the woods forever.

Freshly posted on X:

People are too casual about the fact that parrots can talk.

Seen just now on Telegram:

Quitting my job to focus on staying inside.

Freshly posted on Threads:

Maturing is when you’d rather drink your bourbon half-naked on the couch than go out.

Freshly posted on Threads:

You can be having the nicest day and then you have to print something and you know your day is about to fall apart real fast.

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