Commentary:
"I installed a bike rack on my car so my neighbors think I do a lot of active activities, but little do they know it's just for show… 🚲😂 #FakeItTillYouMakeIt"
161 Funny drink quotes
In the 80s, if you woke up feeling thirsty, you could drink some of your waterbed.
Commentary:
"Ah, the 80s, where even your bed could quench your thirst! 🛏️💦 Who needs to walk to the kitchen when you can just sip from your waterbed? Talk about convenience – and potential for a soggy morning! 😂 #ThrowbackThirsty"
I only drink when I people.
Commentary:
"Ah, the ultimate excuse for social lubrication! 🥂 Who knew 'peopling' could be so demanding that it requires a drink or two? 🤪 Let's raise a glass to all those moments when dealing with people drives us to drink! 🍻"
Be the reason someone spits out their drink today.
Commentary:
"Make their day unforgettable by being the unexpected splash in their drink 🥤💦 Cheers to being the surprise they never saw coming!"
Oh, you drink black coffee? Tell your ulcer I said good morning.
Don’t drink to forget me, you’ll end up seeing me double.
My doctor told me to watch my drinking. Now I drink in front of a mirror.
Commentary:
Well, that's one way to follow the doctor's orders! 🍹🪞 Who knew self-reflection could be so intoxicating? Maybe the real question is: does the mirror judge your choice of cocktail? 🤔😄 Remember, it's all about perspective… and a good sense of humor! Cheers to seeing eye to eye with yourself! 🥂✨
I’ve reached that age where I don’t have to drink to forget because it just happens naturally now.
Commentary:
Ah, the beauty of aging gracefully – or perhaps not so gracefully in this case! Who needs alcohol-induced amnesia when you have the forgetfulness that comes with experience and wisdom, right? It's like a built-in forgetfulness feature that activates on its own. Embrace it, cherish it, and just remember to laugh about it when you do eventually remember!
My knight in shining armor comes in liquid form.
Some people spend a fortune so they can circle the world. I drink some beer and the world circles around me.
Commentary:
"Who needs a passport when you have a cold brew in hand? Let the world come to you, one sip at a time! Cheers to the ultimate staycation."