Wordgag ツ

10,000+ funny quotes

Activity Log ✨

Someone from 🇱🇹 has shared:

I just need a little time to warm up to you, and then I’ll be super fun, I promise—1-2 years at most.

Someone from 🇱🇧 has downloaded:

Sure, breakups are hard, but have you ever had to wait for your phone to stop ringing so you can start using it again?

Someone from 🇵🇼 has bookmarked:

I wish I was a moose. No work, no school, just eating grass and wrecking cars.

Someone from 🇲🇰 has shared:

Instead of calling it the John I’m going to start calling my bathroom the Jim. That way I can say I go to the Jim every morning.

Someone from 🇨🇿 has shared:

I don’t mind pulling your cart — I’ve been chasing the carrot anyway, and it’s in the same direction.

Someone from 🇨🇷 has downloaded:

Twitter is cool because you can figure out what’s going on in the world through memes instead of watching the news.

Someone from 🇿🇼 has downloaded:

Seriously? I came out of hibernation for this?

Someone from 🇮🇳 has bookmarked:

Asking for a cigarette, then adding it to my own pack.

Someone from 🇧🇳 has shared:

Stop dating if you have no car.

Someone from 🇧🇾 has shared:

I’ve reached the age where people talk loudly and slowly to me.

Funny Quotes Data 🤓

New Funny Quotes

94 this month

Funny Quotes Total

15,363

Funny Quotes Topics

17,479

Funny Quotes Images

15,363

Updated

Jan 2, 2026

Users Online

3,373

Social Media Log 💫

Spotted on WeChat:

If someone asks why you’re so pale, simply reply, completely shocked, “You can see me?”

Going viral on TikTok:

There are two classes of travel: first class and with children.

Shared recently on X:

Dating after 40 is like trying to find the least damaged item at the thrift store that doesn’t smell.

Just landed via LinkedIn:

Closing down one work tab every day until Christmas like a reverse advent calendar.

Spotted on Discord:

If I walk into a girl’s house and she got like 50 plants, I know she’s a keeper because she already takes care of a bunch of useless things. What’s one more?

Going bananas on Discord:

Twitter is where the broken, the used, the fighters, and the lovers gather to appreciate the twisted beauty in one another.

Spotted on Twitch:

Good friends don’t let their friends do stupid things alone.

Freshly posted on Pinterest:

Back in my day, if you were 14 on the internet, you kept that to yourself.

Spreading quickly via WeChat:

If I had money, my life would be pretty much the same, but my dogs would destroy much nicer stuff.

Live now on Reddit:

I was 21 when I was 15, that’s why everything’s boring now.

Funny junk drawer quotes

Funny junk drawer quotes bring a burst of laughter to the chaos we all know and love 🗃️😂. From random keys to mysterious gadgets, these witty sayings perfectly capture the quirky charm of that catch-all spot in your home 🗝️🎉. Ready to smile every time you dig through the clutter? Let’s celebrate the mess with some hilarious vibes and playful words that turn junk into joy! 🎈✨

New funny junk drawer quotes 👇

All funny junk drawer quotes & images can be used for free for non-commercial purposes 👌

New Funny Quotes
🎲 Random Funny Quotes

Welcome to Wordgag! 😉✌️ Enjoy endless laughter with our collection of funny quotes guaranteed to crack you up. 😂💥

Social Media Stars ⭐

38 shares on Messenger this month:

We are all monsters searching for someone to share our lives with.

35 shares on Slack this month:

Hope this email finds you moonwalking out of work early.

70 shares on Reddit this month:

Don’t hate me, date me!

27 shares on Snapchat this month:

Find someone who looks at you the way I look at a cheeseburger.

48 shares on Pinterest this month:

3 friends is enough. 1 for the movie theater, 1 for drinks and apps, 1 for texting concerning mental health information.

77 shares on Threads this month:

That awkward moment when you try something on in a shop but you don’t know if you can get it off again.

42 shares on Messenger this month:

I feel like a large portion of my adult life has been looking for an adult to do my adulting.

31 shares on WhatsApp this month:

I’ve heard so much about the “Eye of the Tiger,” but how come no one ever talks about the other four letters?

94 shares on WeChat this month:

Some days you feel like a hotel light. You’re there, but you don’t have enough energy to really do anything.

50 shares on Discord this month:

Knowledge is knowing a tomato is a fruit; wisdom is not putting it in a fruit salad.

Trending Topics 📁

activity communication day food frustration fun humor i irony joke just know life love me media people procrastination relationship sarcasm social social media someone technology time want work

Hot Jokes 💥

19 folks are currently checking 👀

This cop is parked illegally behind me with his lights on. I’m going to say something.

6 folks are currently checking 👀

Wanted to update everybody on my diet. I’ve decided it’s okay to be fat.

8 folks are currently checking 👀

Google AI is awesome because it kills the planet and doesn’t work.

6 folks are currently checking 👀

You’re never too old or too stupid to become older and stupider.

12 folks are currently checking 👀

The lion does not concern himself at all. The lion is depressed.

22 folks are currently checking 👀

How do you politely tell someone that they ruined your life?

25 folks are currently checking 👀

I just went to Crazy Town, and they said you’re a local legend.

6 folks are currently checking 👀

Diet hack: Spend your money filling up your gas tank so you won’t have money for groceries.

18 folks are currently checking 👀

I miss when my biggest problem was whether my Happy Meal toy matched the one from the commercial.

12 folks are currently checking 👀

I believe in annoyed at first sight.

Funny Quotes Data 🤓

New Funny Quotes

94 this month

Funny Quotes Total

15,363

Funny Quotes Topics

17,479

Funny Quotes Images

15,363

Updated

Jan 2, 2026

Users Online

3,371

Activity Log ✨

Someone from 🇬🇲 has shared:

Satan: “I’d tell you to go to Hell, but I work there and don’t wanna see you everyday.”

Someone from 🇵🇦 has shared:

I wonder if people who spend all their time screaming on the internet know there are way more fun things to do.

Someone from 🇦🇹 has viewed:

My dental plan is, “I guess I’ll just chew on this side of my mouth from now on.”

Someone from 🇰🇲 has shared:

Got fired on my first day working at the drugstore for calling my new coworkers ‘my pharmily’.

Someone from 🇲🇩 has downloaded:

Gatekeeping how insanely handsome I am by looking like total shit all the time.

Someone from 🇸🇻 has copied:

I remember when I was broke… I’m still broke, that’s why I remember so well.

Someone from 🇱🇦 has shared:

I drink my coffee black because I like to save my calories for alcohol.

Someone from 🇳🇦 has viewed:

The worst thing is finding out the “sweet guy” is just a lustful loser.

Someone from 🇰🇳 has copied:

Don’t ever let your computer feel that you’re in a hurry, cause they’re gonna slow down more.

Someone from 🇲🇱 has downloaded:

When I’m drafting a legal document, I’ll sprinkle the word “herein” all over that thing like it’s paprika.

Social Media Log 💫

Shared recently on WhatsApp:

I’ve skipped midlife crisis and gone straight to birdwatching.

Just landed via Discord:

The best weight you’ll ever lose is the weight of other people’s opinions.

Trending via Slack:

I’m begging for a day to be added in between Saturday and Sunday.

Seen just now on Threads:

Well, like I said to my television the other day, “How can these people be so stupid?!?”

Just landed via Facebook:

Well, that’s not very in love with me of you.

Freshly posted on X:

My DMs are always open if you want to talk to yourself.

Seen just now on Discord:

Parenting a teenager is surreal because you’ll be sitting there, and some dude who is much taller than you will walk around the corner and ask you how to open a popcorn bag.

Breaking via LinkedIn:

Summer Olympics is just me swimming in sweat and wrestling with my sports bra.

Shared recently on Messenger:

Women only want one thing, and it’s the power to cast men who tell us to smile right into a pit of giant venomous serpents.

Just shared via Reddit:

My superpower is to make anyone I wanna make comfortable feel uncomfortable.

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