Wordgag ツ

10,000+ funny quotes

Activity Log ✨

Someone from 🇱🇾 has copied:

The gossip in my town is faster than the Wi-Fi.

Someone from 🇩🇴 has downloaded:

Imagine you blocked me, and I crawled out from under your couch to ask why.

Someone from 🇧🇬 has shared:

One year older today, and still no closer to growing up.

Someone from 🇧🇸 has bookmarked:

They say we learn from our mistakes, that’s why I’m making as many as possible. Soon I’ll be a genius.

Someone from 🇻🇨 has bookmarked:

Someday I will make a sandwich that will change my life forever.

Someone from 🇩🇲 has downloaded:

Whitening my teeth by getting a tan.

Someone from 🇸🇿 has shared:

Cheating before AI required a level of effort that you ended up learning something by default.

Someone from 🇳🇦 has shared:

Having a loose stool means two completely different things depending on if you are a nurse or a bartender.

Someone from 🇻🇳 has bookmarked:

Libraries were a good start, but we really need to keep working on the number of places where people shouldn’t be allowed to talk.

Someone from 🇰🇲 has shared:

There are no laws against pineapples on pizza.

Funny Quotes Data 🤓

New Funny Quotes

calculating…

Funny Quotes Total

15,753

Funny Quotes Topics

17,766

Funny Quotes Images

15,753

Updated

Feb 3, 2026

Users Online

3,422

Social Media Log 💫

Just landed via Discord:

It goes like this: You are born and then you basically do almost everything wrong. Then you die.

Trending via WhatsApp:

I’m so lazy that I’ll break my tooth trying to get this tag off before I get up and get a scissor.

Going bananas on X:

I’ve been blocked by better.

Spotted on WhatsApp:

For all those wondering, yes, I am retired. I was tired yesterday, and I am tired again today.

Going bananas on Slack:

Establish dominance over your children by whining louder.

Broadcasted on Pinterest:

You’ve never burned music to a CD, and it shows.

Trending via Twitch:

People who wear jeans for fun around their house have bodies buried in their backyard.

Going viral on YouTube:

When my wife packs for a trip she basically moves out.

Going viral on TikTok:

The ugliest version of me is the version that comes out when I play board games. I don’t know who she is, but she is a monster. She is not fit for human interaction.

Trending via Messenger:

“You’re so quiet.” Thanks, I’m not comfortable around you.

Funny mop quotes

Funny mop quotes mop up the boredom and bring a splash of humor to your cleaning routine 🧹😂 Whether you’re battling spills or just sweeping through life, these witty lines will have you chuckling while you work 💦🤣 Get ready to mop, laugh, and maybe even dance a little—because cleaning doesn’t have to be a drag! 🕺✨

New funny mop quotes 👇

All funny mop quotes & images can be used for free for non-commercial purposes 👌

Random Funny Quotes

Social Media Stars ⭐

90 shares on Messenger this month:

Asian parents give you unmoanable names so you can focus on your studies.

90 shares on Slack this month:

People will make you sad but cheese will always make you happy. The choice is simple.

38 shares on YouTube this month:

May the algorithms be with you.

21 shares on LinkedIn this month:

You can just enjoy kombucha. You don’t need to go on a tirade about cleansing your gut.

37 shares on X this month:

When I eat rotisserie chicken, I like to pretend that I’m performing an autopsy.

42 shares on Twitch this month:

He said he thinks I’m resilient to everything, so I thanked him, but on second thought, he may have low key called me a cockroach.

86 shares on TikTok this month:

I love cute tiny purses, but I’m sad to say I can never be a cute tiny purse girl. I need to haul my hoard of objects everywhere I go, because what if….

46 shares on Telegram this month:

Just bought 4 pounds of cherries like I’m in some math problem.

20 shares on LinkedIn this month:

I used to be able to eat whatever I wanted without gaining weight. Now I pick up a fork and gain seven pounds.

42 shares on X this month:

Whenever someone asks me if my dog is adopted I respond with, “no, she’s biologically mine.”

Trending Topics 📁

activity communication day food frustration fun humor i irony joke just know life love me media people procrastination relationship sarcasm social social media someone technology time want work

Hot Jokes 💥

8 folks are currently checking 👀

Please don’t use fear to manipulate me. Much more effective to use cake.

24 folks are currently checking 👀

Hell hath no fury like a toddler who lost the chance to push a button.

20 folks are currently checking 👀

Who called them sea lions and not soggy doggies?

20 folks are currently checking 👀

I love a touchy-feely man. Like, yes, please keep your hands on me.

12 folks are currently checking 👀

Delete a letter of his name from your contacts every time he makes you upset. When his name’s gone, he’s gone. Hangman that boy.

16 folks are currently checking 👀

They should list at least one alien “as himself” in the Star Wars credits.

7 folks are currently checking 👀

When I die I want people to say “Hmm, I didn’t know you could die like that.”

9 folks are currently checking 👀

Men can stay up til 2 a.m., wake up at 6, be in debt, broke, alone, and still have faith that one day, everything will work out. It’s called being a man.

15 folks are currently checking 👀

Oh, you drink black coffee? Tell your ulcer I said good morning.

5 folks are currently checking 👀

The real advantage of being self-employed is that you don’t have to go to a Christmas party.

Funny Quotes Data 🤓

New Funny Quotes

calculating…

Funny Quotes Total

15,753

Funny Quotes Topics

17,766

Funny Quotes Images

15,753

Updated

Feb 3, 2026

Users Online

3,378

Activity Log ✨

Someone from 🇬🇲 has copied:

If you say my name three times in the mirror, I show up and kiss you on the forehead.

Someone from 🇨🇾 has copied:

Even at my most powerful, I’m still a little sleepy.

Someone from 🇭🇺 has shared:

“Fox Mulder” is an aggressively sexy name.

Someone from 🇩🇯 has copied:

Please do not test me. I’ve been saving up my rage like PTO.

Someone from 🇵🇬 has viewed:

Having a toddler is wild. I’m getting breaking news about Peppa Pig.

Someone from 🇲🇾 has copied:

The first 7 days of the week aren’t for me.

Someone from 🇧🇪 has shared:

The husband, child, and dog are all snoring. WTF is this?

Someone from 🇩🇲 has viewed:

I’m not saying I’ve aged like fine wine, but I am currently being stored in a dark place and avoiding sunlight at all costs.

Someone from 🇹🇼 has viewed:

I don’t drink blood to stay young. I do it mainly for the lifestyle.

Someone from 🇬🇦 has copied:

It’s leg day. No, not at the gym, dummy. I’m shaving them.

Social Media Log 💫

Spotted on TikTok:

Sorry I didn’t text you back, I was pretending I didn’t see it and ended up actually forgetting.

Shared recently on Snapchat:

Grateful for independence mostly because British food is gross.

Freshly posted on Snapchat:

When I turned into the harbor of marriage, I didn’t know that a warship was anchored there.

Trending via Snapchat:

Refusing to attend my brother’s gambling intervention until they agree to call it a slot shaming.

Shared recently on Telegram:

The problem with “treat yourself” is that I don’t know how to stop. I had a bad day in March, and I’ve been treating myself ever since.

Live now on Instagram:

It’s amazing to think that a Penguin wrote all of those classic books.

Trending via Threads:

Sometimes it’s not a secret, it’s just none of your business.

Shared recently on WhatsApp:

I think something is so beautifully wrong with you.

Seen just now on Pinterest:

If you’re the type of person who likes to be left alone, I’m with you. Better yet, I’m not with you.

Trending via Snapchat:

I wonder whatever happened to the tiny dogs all of those terrible women were carrying around in their purses.

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