17 funny ghosts quotes - Wordgag

If three ghosts visited me on Christmas, I’d make them play Mario Party with me.

Apr 1, 2026

It actually is crazy how many people I know would benefit from being visited by three ghosts.

Apr 1, 2026

I feel like this holiday season, it’s important to remind people of the true meaning of Christmas: ghosts terrorizing rich people in the middle of the night until they agree to pay their employees more.

Apr 1, 2026

Farts are just the ghosts of the things we eat.

Mar 31, 2026

To the spirits in my walls: going to the store, be right back.

Mar 30, 2026

You should always wash your sheets once a week in case they are really ghosts and need a shower.

Mar 29, 2026

Her heart is an abandoned garden filled with ghosts and dying flowers.

Mar 27, 2026

Ouija boards are like unannounced phone calls for ghosts.

Mar 27, 2026

Nothing angers me more than tall ghosts in horror movies. No one born in 1782 was that tall. Do your research, screenwriters.

Mar 26, 2026

Notice how ghosts never wear fitted sheets?

Mar 26, 2026

I’m not afraid of ghosts because everyone who’s mad at me is still alive.

Mar 26, 2026

If someone ghosts you, respect the dead and never disturb them again.

Mar 26, 2026

Why didn’t Scooby Doo smell that the ghosts were human?

Mar 26, 2026

Dear ghosts, if you can move stuff around and flicker lights, then you can use a mop.

Mar 25, 2026

Definitely thought I’d be solving mysteries and unmasking ghosts in a van with a dog by this point in my life.

Mar 25, 2026

Tornados are just a bunch of ghosts fighting over a cow.

Mar 25, 2026

I never had kids because little kids see too many ghosts and that’s something I’d rather not know about.

Mar 24, 2026