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10,000+ funny quotes

Activity Log ✨

Someone from πŸ‡¨πŸ‡· has downloaded:

Life hack: You don’t need white noise to sleep when you have constant ringing in your ears.

Someone from πŸ‡΅πŸ‡Ό has copied:

Do you also have teenagers whose styling motto is: freeze to death for coolness?

Someone from πŸ‡¨πŸ‡Ώ has downloaded:

Wearing white pants today, so it’s really just a matter of time before I spill something on myself.

Someone from πŸ‡¨πŸ‡Ί has shared:

Sorry, boss, I can’t come in to work today, I’m gonna be playing outside.

Someone from πŸ‡±πŸ‡Έ has bookmarked:

You’re an adult if you’re happy every time the mailbox is empty.

Someone from πŸ‡§πŸ‡Ύ has viewed:

I waste a lot of time putting my phone down to just pick it back up again.

Someone from πŸ‡ΏπŸ‡Ό has bookmarked:

I’m a bit of a traditionalist, so on my birthday, I smear my body with embryonic fluid.

Someone from πŸ‡ΊπŸ‡¦ has copied:

I don’t procrastinate, I delegate to my future self.

Someone from πŸ‡±πŸ‡§ has downloaded:

I can be social. Today I meowed at my cat and he meowed back.

Someone from πŸ‡¨πŸ‡³ has viewed:

Opened two gifts this morning, and they were my eyes.

Funny Quotes Data πŸ€“

New Funny Quotes

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Funny Quotes Total

15,753

Funny Quotes Topics

17,766

Funny Quotes Images

15,753

Updated

Feb 3, 2026

Users Online

3,457

Social Media Log πŸ’«

Seen just now on Instagram:

My fitness goal is to lose two straight jacket sizes.

Trending via WhatsApp:

You’ve agreed to go out with me, so that’s going to immediately count against you.

Trending via Telegram:

Are you stupid, sand? You could just lay here forever on this beautiful beach, but no, you have to try with all you’ve got, to get into my shoes.

Going viral on Reddit:

Accept who you are. Unless you’re a serial killer.

Broadcasted on X:

I just wanna be rich enough to not have to run onstage after concerts to get my bra back.

Broadcasted on Instagram:

Ironically jogging pants are mostly worn by the laziest people.

Breaking via Snapchat:

I know I seem a little crazy sometimes, but that’s because I AM.

Just shared via Reddit:

Are you a software update, because not now!

Shared recently on Twitch:

It’s so hot outside that when I opened my front door I thought I was checking on my oven.

Just shared via YouTube:

I met my wife at a singles night. I was surprised as I thought she was at home with the kids.

Funny nonverbal quotes

Funny nonverbal quotes 🀐✨ capture the hilarious moments when actions speak louder than words! From eye rolls πŸ™„ to sarcastic smirks 😏, these silent expressions say it all without uttering a single sound. Ready to laugh out loud πŸ˜‚ at the power of body language? Get ready for some witty, wordless wisdom that proves sometimes silence is the funniest language of all! 🎭😜

New funny nonverbal quotes πŸ‘‡

All funny nonverbal quotes & images can be used for free for non-commercial purposes πŸ‘Œ

Random Funny Quotes

Social Media Stars ⭐

38 shares on Telegram this month:

For Halloween, I will be okay.

54 shares on Telegram this month:

Patience is something you admire in the driver behind you, but not in the one ahead.

41 shares on Slack this month:

I need to go to jail for a while to catch up on all my reading.

37 shares on X this month:

I’m not into casual sex. Send me a rΓ©sumΓ©.

15 shares on Threads this month:

The biggest problem with finding another job is I don’t want one.

31 shares on TikTok this month:

I mostly choose to stay silent in weird situations but my face has subtitles.

13 shares on Snapchat this month:

Every squad has that person who has to go home early.

48 shares on Facebook this month:

I noticed my mouse problem is back an I yelled at my cats for being lazy and not doing their job, like I was in a Tom and Jerry cartoon.

98 shares on Messenger this month:

I don’t get enough credit for acting far less crazy than I actually am.

95 shares on YouTube this month:

Just had a salad but it didn’t make me laugh like women in stock photos.

Trending Topics πŸ“

activity communication day food frustration fun humor i irony joke just know life love me media people procrastination relationship sarcasm social social media someone technology time want work

Hot Jokes πŸ’₯

11 folks are currently checking πŸ‘€

Maybe the real American dream is the debt we collected along the way.

13 folks are currently checking πŸ‘€

The crematorium is my last hope for a hot body.

6 folks are currently checking πŸ‘€

Making dinner with my left hand, so it feels like someone else is doing it.

15 folks are currently checking πŸ‘€

Nothing humbles you faster than rereading something you were proud of yesterday.

10 folks are currently checking πŸ‘€

Dentist appointments are so weird. β€œHi, nice to meet you, could you root around in my mouth for a bit?”

15 folks are currently checking πŸ‘€

I march to the beat of my own dumb.

17 folks are currently checking πŸ‘€

People found guilty of not using punctuation deserve the longest sentence possible.

15 folks are currently checking πŸ‘€

I speak my mind, cause it hurts when I bite my tongue.

7 folks are currently checking πŸ‘€

I need the youth to start reading. Even if it’s the tag on your underwear. Read it.

19 folks are currently checking πŸ‘€

I wish religion made people nicer to each other.

Funny Quotes Data πŸ€“

New Funny Quotes

calculating…

Funny Quotes Total

15,753

Funny Quotes Topics

17,766

Funny Quotes Images

15,753

Updated

Feb 3, 2026

Users Online

3,712

Activity Log ✨

Someone from πŸ‡©πŸ‡Ώ has bookmarked:

My husband said it would be easier if we had a Christmas house that we moved into in December, instead of taking all these decorations out.

Someone from πŸ‡«πŸ‡² has viewed:

“You just want an easy life.” Should I want a difficult one?

Someone from πŸ‡³πŸ‡¬ has downloaded:

I prefer the Easter Bunny, for starters, he’s not making a list and checking it twice, and more importantly, he’s not watching me when I’m sleeping.

Someone from πŸ‡¨πŸ‡² has downloaded:

Handing the bus driver a $50 bill and telling him β€œJust drive”.

Someone from πŸ‡«πŸ‡² has shared:

I hope the next time you’re stressed, it’s because you’re choosing between Japan, Bali, Switzerland, or the Maldives.

Someone from πŸ‡¨πŸ‡¦ has bookmarked:

No matter how sad their story is, don’t let anybody move into your house.

Someone from πŸ‡¬πŸ‡­ has viewed:

Being old is basically trying to figure out what part of the body the noise is coming from, and why.

Someone from πŸ‡²πŸ‡Ύ has viewed:

The only time you should be faking it is when your pet checks to see if you’re awake.

Someone from πŸ‡§πŸ‡­ has downloaded:

No one lies more than a parent who says, “We’ll see.” You know we’re not seeing anything.

Someone from πŸ‡ͺπŸ‡· has copied:

Hate it when my alarm goes off in the morning, and I’m still alive.

Social Media Log πŸ’«

Just shared via Pinterest:

Don’t really want to have 6-8 pints and a takeaway tonight, but it’s Friday and rules are rules.

Spreading quickly via Messenger:

Ironic that the two Ζ‘’s in “cooperate” insist on having their own separate sounds.

Spotted on WhatsApp:

My hobbies include trying to close the elevator doors before anyone else gets on.

Spreading quickly via Twitch:

I hear the responses my young siblings give my mom, and I’m speechless; they don’t know the commando she was in her prime.

Going viral on LinkedIn:

You sound unhinged. Let’s go get mugshots.

Just landed via Messenger:

Why do you assume it’s invalid to “make stuff up” during an argument? It shows initiative and creativity.

Spotted on Facebook:

Not now, I’m busy doing tax crimes on my abacus.

Making waves on Slack:

The dildo of consequences rarely arrives lubed.

Breaking via Threads:

Back in the day, you used to have to listen to records backwards to discover conspiracy theories.

Going viral on Discord:

Some people believe the appendix is a vestigial organ, that its use has long since passed. I think it’s primordial. Its use has yet to come.

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