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10,000+ funny quotes

Activity Log ✨

Someone from 🇲🇻 has bookmarked:

Don’t worry password, I’m insecure too.

Someone from 🇻🇨 has downloaded:

Why do I gotta dress for success? Maybe success could be the one who puts a little more into this relationship.

Someone from 🇳🇿 has copied:

Christmas bonus so small you have to call your bank and ask “is it in yet?”

Someone from 🇹🇴 has viewed:

Always stay crazy. Otherwise you’ll go crazy.

Someone from 🇹🇼 has bookmarked:

Opening a bakery and calling it “I’m a crepe. I’m a weird dough.”

Someone from 🇦🇴 has shared:

I would do anything for a job, except write a cover letter.

Someone from 🇻🇳 has bookmarked:

“Love is in the air.” Wrong. Microplastics.

Someone from 🇦🇬 has viewed:

My optimism doesn’t come out of thin air. A flask is involved.

Someone from 🇩🇴 has shared:

They should invent a day where I don’t wonder why.

Someone from 🇰🇭 has shared:

Take my advice, I’m not using it.

Funny Quotes Data 🤓

New Funny Quotes

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Funny Quotes Total

15,753

Funny Quotes Topics

17,766

Funny Quotes Images

15,753

Updated

Feb 3, 2026

Users Online

3,453

Social Media Log 💫

Just shared via Threads:

Home is where you’ve left the shopping list.

Freshly posted on X:

Canadian Thanksgiving isn’t the same day as Thanksgiving in the US because Canadians already put gravy on everything every day.

Spotted on Instagram:

I love when people start getting filler, and instead of looking younger, it’s just like okay, your face is getting really, really big in all directions.

Spreading quickly via Threads:

Steve Jobs was a vibe coder. He just prompted Steve Wozniak.

Making waves on Slack:

Television is better for you than phone. It is like vaping vs smoking.

Freshly posted on Threads:

Welcome to your 40’s: it’s ten years of people saying “wait until you’re 50”.

Spotted on YouTube:

If you keep your AC any higher than 75, please don’t invite me to your terrarium, you lizard.

Spotted on Instagram:

I was living in the moment until I was evicted.

Going viral on Telegram:

People who take care of chickens are literally chicken tenders.

Spotted on WeChat:

I’ve asked so many people what LGBTQ stands for. So far no one has given me a straight answer.

Funny orc quotes

New funny orc quotes 👇

Sharks are orcs, dolphins are elves.

5 days ago

animal, animal comparison, comparison, creature, dolphin, elf, fantasy, humor, mythical, mythical creature, orc, shark
Hey there, Delilah, what’s it like in new orc city?

6 days ago

city, Delilah, greeting, new, New York City, orc, question, york
I used to mix Mountain Dew with the cheapest vodka I could find, and I called it the Blood of Mannaroth because it’s green and turns you into an orc.

6 days ago

alcoholic, alcoholic beverage, beverage, blood, Blood of Mannaroth, dew, drink, fantasy, green, green drink, humor, i, mannaroth, mix, mixing, mixing drink, mountain, Mountain Dew, nickname, orc, used, vodka

All funny orc quotes & images can be used for free for non-commercial purposes 👌

Funny Quotes Collections

✨ New Funny Quotes

Social Media Stars ⭐

96 shares on WhatsApp this month:

Texting is so boring. Just show up to my door with roses.

60 shares on X this month:

Saying “sounds good to me” in a meeting then quickly realizing a lot more was expected from you.

43 shares on TikTok this month:

If you’re offended by bacon, the United States of America isn’t for you.

86 shares on Snapchat this month:

The trouble with living alone is that it’s always my turn to do the dishes.

79 shares on YouTube this month:

Start every meeting with, “Let’s just agree to disagree.”

13 shares on YouTube this month:

Welcome to adulthood: your chin looks lonely, here’s another one.

66 shares on Slack this month:

My favorite thing to do is nothing, with no one.

70 shares on Slack this month:

Sorry, I ghosted you. I liked you too much.

98 shares on Messenger this month:

Once you find humor in any situation, you have nothing to fear.

13 shares on Instagram this month:

I don’t even know what the Transformers are fighting about, to be honest.

Activity Log ✨

Someone from 🇲🇰 has viewed:

Sometimes I think I should talk to my colleagues more often. Until I talk to my colleagues.

Someone from 🇭🇳 has shared:

Someone called me strict today, and that means a lot to me because I’m a recovering people pleaser.

Someone from 🇲🇿 has shared:

If I were you, I would rather be me.

Someone from 🇲🇾 has viewed:

Gravity, at all times, is trying to pull your pants down.

Someone from 🇵🇹 has copied:

You did all that terrible driving just to end up right next to me at the stop light.

Someone from 🇳🇮 has viewed:

If I was an outlaw in the Wild West, my face would be on unwanted posters.

Someone from 🇨🇲 has bookmarked:

Another day waiting, and wishing, and wanting.

Someone from 🇦🇫 has downloaded:

Someone from 🇦🇿 has copied:

I be like, “Who’s praying on my downfall?” as if I don’t make self-destructive life decisions.

Someone from 🇮🇷 has viewed:

Got possessed by a demon once, and everyone was like, “OMG, did you do something with your hair?”

Social Media Log 💫

Seen just now on Reddit:

Phone dry, no food in the house, I keep dying in my game. I’m such a loser.

Trending via Discord:

Dear God, make me a bird so I can fly. Fly far, far away and also so I can poop on people.

Shared recently on Threads:

Sometimes I sneeze so loud and hard I think I’m a dad.

Going viral on Messenger:

I lied, there’s no sex. I just needed help getting out of my skinny jeans.

Spotted on Telegram:

It’s important to follow your significant other around the grocery store, not helping, and only hovering like the specter of death.

Spotted on Reddit:

As a childless adult, it is my duty to embrace hobbies and pastimes that my peers cannot, as they have sacrificed their free time to maintain the population. I must vibe and chill, and do fun things, in their honor.

Breaking via Facebook:

Babe, you have to believe me. I followed that porn star because I like her political views.

Freshly posted on WeChat:

I wonder if this next thunderstorm is thinking of me, too.

Going viral on X:

Apparently, throwing the remote against the wall didn’t help recharging the batteries.

Seen just now on Messenger:

“We will go ahead and make these changes if we don’t hear from you before Friday” is such an elegant way to solve problems.

Wordgag ツ

Activity Log ✨

Funny orc quotes

New funny orc quotes 👇

Sharks are orcs, dolphins are elves.

Hey there, Delilah, what’s it like in new orc city?

I used to mix Mountain Dew with the cheapest vodka I could find, and I called it the Blood of Mannaroth because it’s green and turns you into an orc.

All funny orc quotes & images can be used for free for non-commercial purposes 👌

Social Media Stars ⭐

Trending Topics 📁

Activity Log ✨