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10,000+ funny quotes

Activity Log ✨

Someone from 🇬🇪 has copied:

Sometime you meet such a prince that you’d rather marry the horse.

Someone from 🇵🇭 has viewed:

Whatever the plot is in Barbie’s movie, my dolls have been through worse.

Someone from 🇰🇬 has bookmarked:

If I found E.T., I would’ve developed his jump shot.

Someone from 🇸🇧 has downloaded:

Game night with the family is only fun until I lose.

Someone from 🇩🇴 has shared:

My youngest started kindergarten today and I cried, but mostly for his teachers.

Someone from 🇧🇾 has copied:

Rapunzel, let down your CVS receipt!

Someone from 🇮🇳 has downloaded:

If you’re lost in the woods, start talking loudly about politics. Someone will come to argue with you.

Someone from 🇸🇳 has bookmarked:

Because of my looks, everyone only wants one thing from me, that I leave them alone.

Someone from 🇬🇾 has downloaded:

When you try to be humble and say it’s no big deal and they agree with you.

Someone from 🇺🇾 has downloaded:

Bro, did you really just mix up e.g. and i.e. in front of the hoes?

Funny Quotes Data 🤓

New Funny Quotes

801 added this month

Funny Quotes Total

10,963

Funny Quotes Topics

13,930

Funny Quotes Images

10,963

Updated

31 minutes ago

Users Online

3,425

Social Media Log 💫

Freshly posted on Telegram:

Facebook should just go back to being Hot or Not dot com.

Just landed via Instagram:

Anyone who thinks things have got so bad that they can only get better is showing a remarkable lack of imagination.

Freshly posted on TikTok:

I never used to worry about death but now I’m terrified it will break my winning Wordle streak.

Shared recently on Pinterest:

If I ever go missing, check the snack aisle. I’m probably just deciding.

Making waves on Reddit:

Half of all the problems in life can be solved by duct tape. For the rest, you’re gonna have to reboot that computer.

Seen just now on WhatsApp:

Stop blaming others for your mistakes. Study Feng Shui and blame the furniture.

Going viral on Slack:

Them: I haven’t seen you in a long time. Me: You’re welcome.

Just landed via TikTok:

Twitter is like talking to yourself in public and some random dude walking by agrees with you.

Spotted on Messenger:

You want me to sit in the back seat? The thing that killed JFK?

Seen just now on YouTube:

Cinderella was a mess. I mean, I have bad taste in men, but at least I never settled for a guy who couldn’t remember what my face looked like.

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Welcome to Wordgag! 😉✌️ Enjoy endless laughter with our collection of funny quotes guaranteed to crack you up. 😂💥

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Funny Quotes Data 🤓

New Funny Quotes

801 added this month

Funny Quotes Total

10,963

Funny Quotes Topics

13,930

Funny Quotes Images

10,963

Updated

31 minutes ago

Users Online

3,448

Funny Quotes of the Month 🚀

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Activity Log ✨

Someone from 🇹🇼 has shared:

If oats can be milk, you can be whatever you want.

Someone from 🇨🇳 has bookmarked:

Mario Kart gave me unrealistic expectations of how banana peels affect traffic.

Someone from 🇵🇱 has viewed:

My idea of housework is to sweep the room with a glance.

Someone from 🇹🇯 has copied:

You’re no Sultan of Swing, buddy, you’re hardly a Governor of Groove.

Someone from 🇺🇸 has bookmarked:

Remember when you were a kid, you slept on the couch and without saying anything you found yourself in your bed. Now you sleep in your bed and if you say anything, you end up on the couch.

Someone from 🇧🇹 has shared:

Ever read something so magnificently stupid that you have to just stare into space for a little while and reconcile with your brain for having been subjected to it?

Someone from 🇩🇿 has downloaded:

I was living in the moment until I was evicted.

Someone from 🇮🇹 has copied:

There is always enough for the needy, there is never enough for the greedy.

Someone from 🇻🇨 has copied:

I either text back right away or never, because I saw your text, replied in my head but forgot to actually type it.

Someone from 🇪🇷 has copied:

Of course, I also put my mobile down from time to time. For example, when someone tries to call me.

Social Media Log 💫

Just landed via Twitch:

I don’t flirt, I just say weird things and hope something sticks.

Just shared via Slack:

It really annoys me when people use the wrong word and don’t have the humidity to admit it.

Freshly posted on TikTok:

My extravagant lifestyle of paying for housing and buying groceries is really getting in the way of my ability to save money.

Breaking via Facebook:

Forget my browser history, when I finally pass from this earth, please delete my calculator history because it’s way more embarrassing.

Broadcasted on Instagram:

9am: anything is possible. 2pm: maybe tomorrow.

Going viral on Instagram:

Brains are funny. I can remember every word to a song I haven’t heard in 20 years, but I’ve got no clue what my email password is.

Live now on Snapchat:

I love my new crockpot. Now we can wait longer to eat my horrible cooking.

Just landed via Facebook:

You should be allowed to leave work early if you are really in love.

Trending via Snapchat:

I don’t jump to conclusions, I cannonball into them like a boss.

Spotted on TikTok:

Sometimes I miss the time when there was only one idiot per village.

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