Wordgag ツ

10,000+ funny quotes

Activity Log ✨

Someone from 🇻🇺 has downloaded:

They should invent a word for when you’re alive but not really living.

Someone from 🇲🇷 has viewed:

Feeling like Floyd in this May weather (illiterate and violent).

Someone from 🇲🇨 has shared:

How am I supposed to relax when there are things?

Someone from 🇨🇻 has copied:

If you want to feel really bad about yourself, just start dating.

Someone from 🇰🇳 has copied:

The concept of warding off vampires with crosses is so interesting to me. I wonder if it applies to any other religion or if they’re allergic to just Catholicism.

Someone from 🇦🇲 has copied:

Chuck Norris can rub two fires together to get a piece of wood.

Someone from 🇨🇺 has downloaded:

I want time to sit and read, take a nap and snack. Basically, I want to be in Kindergarten.

Someone from 🇬🇷 has bookmarked:

I purposely overcook my holiday turkeys so I don’t have to hear anyone at the table say, “moist.”

Someone from 🇸🇱 has shared:

Life is a highway: Too many cars, not enough bathrooms.

Someone from 🇬🇭 has bookmarked:

My dog sighs a lot for someone who doesn’t pay any bills.

Funny Quotes Data 🤓

New Funny Quotes

233 this month

Funny Quotes Total

15,502

Funny Quotes Topics

17,569

Funny Quotes Images

15,502

Updated

Jan 6, 2026

Users Online

3,367

Social Media Log 💫

Seen just now on Messenger:

Welcome to the internet, where people are confidently wrong all the time.

Breaking via Telegram:

The week before your period doesn’t make any sense… until you realize it’s the week before your period.

Just landed via X:

Sometimes I do this fun little thing, where I take the time to write a grocery list, and then I forget it at home.

Spotted on WhatsApp:

The cool side of the pillow just stole my boyfriend.

Spreading quickly via X:

9am: anything is possible. 2pm: maybe tomorrow.

Trending via Pinterest:

I had no idea being an adult would involve so many lotions.

Just shared via Twitch:

These days, you gotta have a job for the bills and another job for yourself.

Going viral on WeChat:

They all cheat, lie and manipulate. Just pick the pretty one.

Shared recently on WhatsApp:

No more relationships for me, the last one was an embarrassment to my gangsta.

Seen just now on LinkedIn:

I respectfully ignore DMs because I promise you, I am not your soulmate.

Funny sheets quotes

Funny sheets quotes bring a cozy twist to your bedtime routine 😴✨ Whether you’re snuggling solo or sharing the covers, these witty lines will have you laughing before lights out 😂🛏️ Ready to turn your sheets into a comedy stage? Let’s dive into the world of playful puns and cheeky sayings that make sleepy moments way more fun! 🌙💬

New funny sheets quotes 👇

All funny sheets quotes & images can be used for free for non-commercial purposes 👌

New Funny Quotes
🎲 Random Funny Quotes

Welcome to Wordgag! 😉✌️ Enjoy endless laughter with our collection of funny quotes guaranteed to crack you up. 😂💥

Social Media Stars ⭐

95 shares on Threads this month:

The hottest part of sex is when I take off my glasses and put them in a safe place.

93 shares on TikTok this month:

Need to become a tour guide. I’ve just realized it’s the only job I can think of that combines my loves of walking around and knowing more than everyone around me.

18 shares on Facebook this month:

What age will I grow out of not answering the door when I’m home and sneaking around the house to find out who’s knocking?

20 shares on Discord this month:

You look like the kind of person whose recorded calls have been used for training purposes.

45 shares on Snapchat this month:

Text a co-worker at a random time “are you joining this meeting?” as a fun holiday prank.

57 shares on Slack this month:

If you’re in first class on a flight, sometimes they upgrade you to captain.

42 shares on Pinterest this month:

That very depressing moment when you find out the fire alarm that went off at work was just a test.

17 shares on Snapchat this month:

My tombstone will read “Hey there, I’m using WhatsApp!”.

56 shares on TikTok this month:

Kids be like: “Nice bathroom mirror. It would be a shame if I spat toothpaste all over it.”

12 shares on X this month:

What kind of psychopath wants to be the life of the party?

Trending Topics 📁

activity communication day food frustration fun humor i irony joke just know life love me media people procrastination relationship sarcasm social social media someone technology time want work

Hot Jokes 💥

11 folks are currently checking 👀

Forgetting your phone at home is the modern equivalent of leaving your sword behind in medieval times.

8 folks are currently checking 👀

Halloween is cool, but nothing is spookier than my previous choices in men.

13 folks are currently checking 👀

Daffodil totally sounds like an insult, you blooming daffodil.

7 folks are currently checking 👀

The more water you drink, the more bathroom breaks, the less you work. Stay hydrated.

14 folks are currently checking 👀

Once married, the woman takes over the entire closet and the man stores everything he owns in his left cargo pocket.

14 folks are currently checking 👀

Grab your own butt! Love yourself!

9 folks are currently checking 👀

Girls actually do love nice guys. It’s just that you’re not as nice a guy as you think you are…

17 folks are currently checking 👀

For Halloween, I’m going as an emotional roller coaster.

5 folks are currently checking 👀

Ladies, repeat after me: “I was wrong and I am sorry!”

19 folks are currently checking 👀

The secret ingredient to being really funny is childhood trauma.

Funny Quotes Data 🤓

New Funny Quotes

233 this month

Funny Quotes Total

15,502

Funny Quotes Topics

17,569

Funny Quotes Images

15,502

Updated

Jan 6, 2026

Users Online

3,240

Activity Log ✨

Someone from 🇫🇯 has copied:

I don’t like this new trend of old people wearing shirts of bands I listened to when I was a kid.

Someone from 🇰🇭 has viewed:

There aren’t enough hours in the day for me to do absolutely nothing.

Someone from 🇳🇷 has viewed:

Another fine day ruined by responsibilities.

Someone from 🇨🇩 has copied:

Apparently, if you leave your Tupperware cupboard unorganized for too long, they procreate, and extra lids appear out of nowhere.

Someone from 🇪🇬 has downloaded:

That moment when a zombie out for brains walks past you.

Someone from 🇩🇴 has viewed:

Spiraling out of control if anyone wants anything.

Someone from 🇹🇴 has shared:

Have your guardian angel call my guardian angel.

Someone from 🇰🇲 has shared:

If you think I’m rude, you should hear the voices in my head.

Someone from 🇬🇹 has bookmarked:

The grass isn’t really greener over there; that’s just a filter.

Someone from 🇸🇧 has downloaded:

Where can one find a sugar daddy? Asking for a friend.

Social Media Log 💫

Shared recently on Instagram:

God saw you do that.

Going bananas on YouTube:

You’ll pay good money to hear a comedian say something offensive, but when I say it for free, I’m the bad guy.

Just shared via Telegram:

I’m tired of things costing money.

Shared recently on Threads:

Oh great, you brought your ancient ancestors with you.

Seen just now on Telegram:

In terms of wasting time, today was very productive.

Making waves on YouTube:

Welcome to adulthood: you’re always sleepy unless you’re trying to get to sleep.

Making waves on Telegram:

I see stand-up comedy as a stepping stone to television. A few more paid gigs and I’ll be able to afford a television.

Freshly posted on Pinterest:

I have the patience of a nearly ripe avocado.

Freshly posted on Facebook:

If you see me sad, just hug me and put some money in my pocket.

Seen just now on YouTube:

It’s almost time to put winter tires on the struggle bus.

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Made with ❤️ in Sydney ☀️🌴