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10,000+ funny quotes

Activity Log ✨

Someone from 🇲🇳 has copied:

I smoke weed for my mental health and your personal safety.

Someone from 🇳🇿 has copied:

Nobody is meaner to me than me. So take your shot.

Someone from 🇩🇿 has downloaded:

I can’t believe I’m supposed to obey ALL the traffic laws ALL the time.

Someone from 🇹🇿 has bookmarked:

The world is my oyster and I’m allergic to shellfish.

Someone from 🇱🇷 has viewed:

Establish dominance by eating a salad in front of your indoor plants.

Someone from 🇾🇪 has viewed:

The worst thing you can do when you notice your kids are playing nicely together is telling them that they’re playing nicely together.

Someone from 🇬🇶 has downloaded:

Getting mad when an app updates and changes their format is the new “rearranged grocery store” for me.

Someone from 🇸🇳 has bookmarked:

Problematic bed time gap relationship.

Someone from 🇦🇱 has copied:

Be the reason why a count unleashes ancient horrors onto the world when he thinks of you.

Someone from 🇫🇷 has copied:

This flight is so long, I don’t know where I’m going anymore. I just live here now. Even the crying baby gave up.

Funny Quotes Data 🤓

New Funny Quotes

105 this month

Funny Quotes Total

15,374

Funny Quotes Topics

17,485

Funny Quotes Images

15,374

Updated

Jan 2, 2026

Users Online

3,479

Social Media Log 💫

Making waves on YouTube:

Imagining how cathartic it must feel to send forth thousands and thousands of bats from your Transylvanian manor.

Trending via Snapchat:

According to a new study, people who often trail off in the middle of a sentence are 30% more likely to

Shared recently on YouTube:

Stop making eye contact with me, I can’t afford a wedding right now.

Making waves on Snapchat:

Ever since I was a little girl, I knew I wanted to annoy the shit out of a beautiful man for the rest of my life.

Live now on X:

Just because you can connect to your neighbor’s bluetooth speaker and play ghost noises doesn’t mean you should.

Making waves on Snapchat:

People who read and do research will always sound crazy to people who don’t.

Spreading quickly via Messenger:

Asking my boyfriend if he would still date me if an alien had done experiments on me that killed me but, as a gesture of kindness, replaced me with a perfect replica, and he was the only one who knew.

Shared recently on TikTok:

Feminism convinced women they could have it all. Now they’re 40, independent, and crying in a very nice but empty apartment.

Live now on Instagram:

It’s cool how seeing a less flattering photo of an attractive friend does not change my perception of them at all, but seeing one of myself makes me want to jump off a bridge.

Just shared via Threads:

Driving behind a salt truck on a snowy day is a Midwest police escort.

Funny space exploration quotes

Funny space exploration quotes 🚀✨ bring a cosmic twist to the wonders of the universe! Whether you’re dreaming of moonwalks 🌕 or intergalactic adventures 🌌, these witty lines add a splash of humor to the vastness of space. Perfect for stargazers, space nerds, and anyone who loves a good laugh among the stars 🌟. Get ready to orbit around some out-of-this-world fun! 😄👩‍🚀

New funny space exploration quotes 👇

All funny space exploration quotes & images can be used for free for non-commercial purposes 👌

New Funny Quotes
🎲 Random Funny Quotes

Welcome to Wordgag! 😉✌️ Enjoy endless laughter with our collection of funny quotes guaranteed to crack you up. 😂💥

Social Media Stars ⭐

85 shares on Slack this month:

Asked my therapist who their therapist was and went to see them. Asked them the same thing until I got to the final boss therapist and defeated them with my trainwreck of a life.

58 shares on Telegram this month:

Got a new high score on my bathroom scale.

58 shares on Reddit this month:

The sexual tension between me and disappearing without an explanation.

42 shares on X this month:

My parents often told me I would lose my own head if it wasn’t screwed on and now that I’m an adult, I want to know what tools I need to have it screwed off.

65 shares on Reddit this month:

If you’re ever wondering what to do in an uncomfortable situation, just think “What would teenage me do?” And then do the opposite of that.

19 shares on Reddit this month:

My lawyer dropped his briefcase and nunchuks fell out.

92 shares on Messenger this month:

You can’t spell crypto without “cry”.

59 shares on WhatsApp this month:

I’m not addicted to Twitter. I’m just a really good listener so I want to know what everyone has to say.

81 shares on WeChat this month:

“God has a plan for you!” Okay, well, I have some notes for him.

23 shares on YouTube this month:

I’m just a girl looking for another snack.

Trending Topics 📁

activity communication day food frustration fun humor i irony joke just know life love me media people procrastination relationship sarcasm social social media someone technology time want work

Hot Jokes 💥

11 folks are currently checking 👀

The hottest part of sex is when I take off my glasses and put them in a safe place.

11 folks are currently checking 👀

“Because my hair is not done” is a very valid reason to decline an outing.

22 folks are currently checking 👀

I would be very interested to hear from someone who is ILLEGALLY blind.

14 folks are currently checking 👀

Hand sanitizer will find a cut you didn’t even know you had.

17 folks are currently checking 👀

Why the hell is it called the restroom? I am fighting for my life in here.

7 folks are currently checking 👀

You should be allowed to speed if good music is playing.

18 folks are currently checking 👀

If you’re riding a bike in New York City, it means you care about your health. Riding one in Tennessee means you got a DUI.

14 folks are currently checking 👀

If anyone wants to watch the Super Bowl on a large 8k TV, come on over to my place (and bring a large 8k TV).

25 folks are currently checking 👀

“Date” is just another word for: Jeez, had I known that before, I would have stayed home.

25 folks are currently checking 👀

That moment of panic when they invite you inside at the start of the birthday party you thought was a drop off.

Funny Quotes Data 🤓

New Funny Quotes

105 this month

Funny Quotes Total

15,374

Funny Quotes Topics

17,485

Funny Quotes Images

15,374

Updated

Jan 2, 2026

Users Online

3,501

Activity Log ✨

Someone from 🇸🇮 has shared:

Weekends are getting shorter and shorter. You blink and it’s already Sunday 5pm.

Someone from 🇨🇫 has viewed:

If food delivery apps had never been invented, I would either be wildly rich or dead.

Someone from 🇲🇼 has copied:

I now also have a device that tells me whether I’ve taken enough steps today. If I don’t make it one day, it barks and poops in my apartment.

Someone from 🇸🇨 has viewed:

I got 99 problems and money could solve at least 69 of them.

Someone from 🇰🇷 has bookmarked:

Every McDonald’s should have a flag they fly at half mast when the ice cream machine is down.

Someone from 🇭🇺 has viewed:

Either you’re violently frolicking with me or you’re violently frolicking against me.

Someone from 🇦🇴 has bookmarked:

Some people aren’t just missing a screw, the whole toolbox is gone.

Someone from 🇪🇬 has downloaded:

Putting away the Christmas tree. Sad day for cats.

Someone from 🇲🇨 has downloaded:

I’m trying to cut back on how much sense I make.

Someone from 🇻🇨 has downloaded:

They should invent a day where I feel normal.

Social Media Log 💫

Going viral on Twitch:

This meeting could have been a cake.

Freshly posted on Twitch:

I’m afraid to go to therapy — what if they fix me and I lose my funny?

Spotted on WhatsApp:

As a beautiful woman, sometimes the most powerful thing you can say is “ew.”

Going bananas on Snapchat:

There’s an epidemic of people just staring at their phones in their parked cars.

Broadcasted on LinkedIn:

Do I work hard? No. But do I work smart to compensate. Absolutely not.

Making waves on LinkedIn:

My signature move is me looking for my phone that I’m currently holding in my hand.

Just shared via Reddit:

Sorry, I’m late. I got caught up at home being happy.

Freshly posted on Slack:

Turns out the honeymoon phase lasts forever when you pick the right partner.

Live now on Threads:

I had a million opportunities to waste money this year, and I took them all. In fact, even when there wasn’t an opportunity, I created one.

Seen just now on Snapchat:

Kids are like pancakes. The first one is always a bit strange.

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