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10,000+ funny quotes

Activity Log ✨

Someone from 🇪🇹 has copied:

I appreciate the people that interact with me and I really appreciate the ones that don’t.

Someone from 🇮🇩 has bookmarked:

And what do we do when we are sad? “Add to cart”

Someone from 🇨🇷 has bookmarked:

I would describe my personal style as whatever is on top of the pile of clothes on the floor.

Someone from 🇰🇮 has shared:

Lord, please take this gas out of my stomach and put it in my car.

Someone from 🇲🇱 has viewed:

The sheer audacity of life to ask anything of me today.

Someone from 🇳🇪 has viewed:

If I ever win the lottery and decide to invest in a billboard company, I won’t tell anyone; but there will be signs.

Someone from 🇭🇹 has copied:

I’m addicted to placebos.

Someone from 🇨🇷 has downloaded:

No revenge, because losing someone like me is enough.

Someone from 🇨🇩 has viewed:

I’d log off, but I get so tired of hearing myself talk.

Someone from 🇲🇱 has copied:

One of the most amazing things in nature is that the basketball hoop is the perfect size to fit a basketball through.

Funny Quotes Data 🤓

New Funny Quotes

2382 added this month

Funny Quotes Total

12,544

Funny Quotes Topics

15,227

Funny Quotes Images

12,544

Updated

3 hours ago

Users Online

3,442

Social Media Log 💫

Just landed via WeChat:

Ribbed condoms don’t even taste like ribs.

Seen just now on Snapchat:

Bold of me to constantly use the phrase “no worries!” when I am, in fact, constantly full of many worries.

Just landed via TikTok:

80% of arguments start because someone hasn’t eaten yet.

Trending via Reddit:

Born to be a frolicker of the forest, forced to be a cog in the machine.

Going viral on Telegram:

Is there a rehab for introverts who try to extrovert? Asking for a friend.

Spotted on Threads:

Why does tiredness on the couch not follow me to the bed?

Just landed via Reddit:

Romance level: At some point, someone comes by, sees me and thinks: “Oh well, my God, why not?”

Reported on TikTok:

I’m going to need to speak with the flowers about this.

Making waves on Threads:

Are you coming to the party? There will be noise and lights but I found a corner for us to hide.

Freshly posted on Discord:

Sorry I missed your call, I was staring in horror at the screen, wondering why on earth you couldn’t just text me.

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Welcome to Wordgag! 😉✌️ Enjoy endless laughter with our collection of funny quotes guaranteed to crack you up. 😂💥

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activity communication day food frustration fun humor i irony joke just know life love me media people procrastination relationship sarcasm social social media someone technology time want work

Funny Quotes Data 🤓

New Funny Quotes

2382 added this month

Funny Quotes Total

12,544

Funny Quotes Topics

15,227

Funny Quotes Images

12,544

Updated

3 hours ago

Users Online

3,457

Funny Quotes of the Month 🚀

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Activity Log ✨

Someone from 🇿🇲 has shared:

New COVID variant tries to sell you an extended auto warranty.

Someone from 🇳🇴 has bookmarked:

At what age do people actually meet up to play bingo? I’m ready.

Someone from 🇨🇾 has downloaded:

You try to fart in the toilet in the morning without waking the whole house and thanks to the brilliant acoustics of the toilet bowl, the horn of Gondor sounds.

Someone from 🇦🇿 has downloaded:

It’s awesome when people honk at you for not moving when you’re letting people cross. You’re right, bro, I should just annihilate this family of four.

Someone from 🇨🇷 has shared:

Ever read something so magnificently stupid that you have to just stare into space for a little while and reconcile with your brain for having been subjected to it?

Someone from 🇨🇩 has copied:

To cut a long story short, I became a film editor.

Someone from 🇩🇿 has bookmarked:

Too self-aware for foreplay. I’m so sorry… Take that nurse costume off. I know you didn’t go to med school.

Someone from 🇹🇼 has shared:

I’m an expert at having a really funny story to tell and then wording it so badly that it’s not even funny anymore.

Someone from 🇨🇺 has shared:

We should be able to go to the bar and drink to watch Love Island, like men do with sports.

Someone from 🇦🇫 has viewed:

Her: how are you still single? Me: it’s easier than you think.

Social Media Log 💫

Spotted on Discord:

My favorite color is sunshine.

Making waves on TikTok:

I don’t want to alarm anyone, but there’s only 365 shopping days left until Christmas.

Just landed via Instagram:

Genies are a myth perpetuated by creepy lamps who just want to get rubbed more.

Shared recently on LinkedIn:

Someone asked me how much I normally spend on a bottle of wine. Answering “usually an hour” wasn’t the right answer. I know this now.

Shared recently on Discord:

My bank account may not be full but my sink, laundry basket and arteries sure are.

Just landed via Threads:

“Are you busy tomorrow?” That entirely depends on what you need me to do.

Broadcasted on Snapchat:

I set up my Nativity scene, but since baby Jesus hasn’t arrived yet, Mary, Joseph and all the Wise Men are just looking down at their phones.

Shared recently on Messenger:

It’s getting slide guitar and harmonica hot outside.

Spotted on Messenger:

I know there are bigger problems in the world right now, but I’ve just realized I’ve never seen a baby seagull.

Reported on Instagram:

Hi, I’m making some changes in my life. If you don’t hear from me, you are one of them.

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