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Commentary:
🙈 Who would have thought the ability to trust our eyes would become a vintage skill? Time to enroll in those reality-detective classes! 🕵️‍♂️✨

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Trending Funny Quotes 👇

“Dairy Queen” is actually the perfect drag name.

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2 months ago

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Terrifying if true: Her eyes lighting up a room.

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2 months ago

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How soon into a new relationship should you let her know you’re an idiot?

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2 months ago

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Always remember you’re someone’s reason to smile. Because you’re a joke.

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2 months ago

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No, baby, I’m not dumping you. I’m just rebranding myself as your ex.

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2 months ago

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Don’t judge me on my likes, I’m confusing the algorithm.

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2 months ago

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New Funny Quotes

🎲 Random Funny Quotes

Welcome to Wordgag! 😉✌️ Enjoy endless laughter with our collection of funny quotes guaranteed to crack you up. 😂💥

🎉🥂 New Year Quotes

Social Media Stars ⭐

30 shares on Slack this month:

Whenever I close an app and immediately open it back up, I really feel how dire it all is.

13 shares on Slack this month:

The final act of love is not texting them happy birthday.

17 shares on YouTube this month:

I am “any text received after 9pm will be answered at 6am” years old.

77 shares on YouTube this month:

Combining breakfast and lunch: Brunch. Combining wine and dinner: Winner.

96 shares on TikTok this month:

All people make me happy. Some when they come, others when they leave.

79 shares on Pinterest this month:

About to form my very first opinion.

19 shares on Reddit this month:

If I like you I keep you close, if not I keep you at a distance so I can mime squishing your head between my thumb and forefinger.

24 shares on Pinterest this month:

You don’t use a semicolons correctly; you use a semicolon confidently.

70 shares on YouTube this month:

I like how people say “travel safely” like I’m the one flying the plane.

47 shares on Pinterest this month:

If I were God, I’d tell everyone that I created the animals and that I don’t know what happened after that.

Activity Log ✨

Someone from 🇻🇨 has downloaded:

Are you ever in the mood to get hit by a car and spend like one month in the hospital?

Someone from 🇰🇭 has bookmarked:

I need to start hiding my money from myself.

Someone from 🇧🇿 has shared:

She left me because of my poor English. But I doesn’t care.

Someone from 🇻🇪 has bookmarked:

My default setting is sexual energy.

Someone from 🇱🇧 has shared:

God, never seen San Francisco this bad. Spiderwebs completely covering entire business, skeletons just strewn about sidewalks in every neighborhood. Things have got to change!

Someone from 🇹🇯 has downloaded:

Processed food was literally designed for you to eat. Organic is just some crap they found on the ground somewhere.

Someone from 🇦🇲 has viewed:

Sometimes, u just gotta clean your room and apply an elaborate skincare routine, and pretend that’s equivalent to getting ur life in order.

Someone from 🇿🇦 has shared:

Remember that even the worst haircut will eventually grow on you.

Someone from 🇹🇩 has bookmarked:

The world is my oyster and I’m allergic to shellfish.

Someone from 🇲🇱 has bookmarked:

Do people who do triathlons know that they don’t have to?

Social Media Log 💫

Trending via Pinterest:

At the age where a big break could mean either my career or a hip.

Just shared via Instagram:

You befriend a guy and a few days later he’s like “I wanna talk to you about something”. Please, God, let it be about the economy.

Shared recently on Pinterest:

Everybody looks like a criminal on the self-checkout camera.

Just shared via Messenger:

TVs are like, literally, the only thing that has gotten cheaper as I’ve gotten older.

Spreading quickly via Twitch:

If it turns cold one more time, I’m gonna put the Christmas tree back up.

Going viral on Snapchat:

I was having a great day, and then, people.

Just shared via Threads:

To cut a long story short, I became a film editor.

Just shared via Reddit:

I’m not addicted to coffee. We’re just very close.

Seen just now on Slack:

Tech bro obsessed with “storytelling,” but hasn’t read a book in the last 5 years.

Seen just now on X:

Earth is hard.

Wordgag ツ

Activity Log ✨

I can’t believe we live in the timeline where we invented a technology to make it so we can never trust a photo or video again.

Related Funny Quotes 🤝

“Dairy Queen” is actually the perfect drag name.

Terrifying if true: Her eyes lighting up a room.

How soon into a new relationship should you let her know you’re an idiot?

Always remember you’re someone’s reason to smile. Because you’re a joke.

No, baby, I’m not dumping you. I’m just rebranding myself as your ex.

Don’t judge me on my likes, I’m confusing the algorithm.

Social Media Stars ⭐

Trending Topics 📁

Activity Log ✨