Wordgag ツ

10,000+ funny quotes

Activity Log ✨

Someone from 🇬🇦 has copied:

A fabric tomato filled with needles. Don’t see that much anymore.

Someone from 🇷🇸 has bookmarked:

Boss: You’ll never find another job like this. Me: That’d be great.

Someone from 🇱🇷 has downloaded:

Kinda psycho that there’s a clothing brand called “Banana Republic.”

Someone from 🇱🇷 has downloaded:

If you love me, please don’t ask me to go camping with you.

Someone from 🇹🇹 has viewed:

Irregardless, for all intensive purposes, I could care less.

Someone from 🇧🇳 has bookmarked:

Unfortunately, I do enjoy watching the downfall of people who did me wrong.

Someone from 🇸🇬 has copied:

Bold of you to assume I have the energy to even climb a hill to die on.

Someone from 🇸🇿 has copied:

Not again. I mean good morning.

Someone from 🇸🇪 has copied:

I don’t simply want to kill a mosquito; I want to bite them back over and over to make them itch.

Someone from 🇯🇲 has copied:

Someone you haven’t talked to in forever will show up in your dream just to do a backflip.

Funny Quotes Data 🤓

New Funny Quotes

calculating…

Funny Quotes Total

15,753

Funny Quotes Topics

17,766

Funny Quotes Images

15,753

Updated

Feb 3, 2026

Users Online

3,557

Social Media Log 💫

Just shared via LinkedIn:

Shoutout to my kids because they aren’t listening!

Spotted on Instagram:

Nothing prepares you for the day you wake up and realize you have a favorite cardigan.

Breaking via Threads:

I have a bit of an inferiority complex. But it’s not a very good one.

Going viral on Threads:

Coffee: Because without it I would be a serious danger to society.

Making waves on Slack:

They should combine the running of the bulls with Tour de France next year.

Seen just now on WhatsApp:

In an effort to demonstrate how pointless internet debates are, please prove to me that snow is real.

Seen just now on Threads:

I regret to inform you all that I just plan on getting hotter and weirder.

Going viral on Instagram:

They’re called grown-ups because they groan every time they get up.

Making waves on X:

My dad’s handwriting makes a pharmacist look like a calligrapher.

Spotted on YouTube:

It’s funny how cats have ears on top of their head, but don’t use them.

I know so many people with cats, and only a tiny number of them went to a shelter and picked out a cat. Everyone else I know with a cat has a story that’s like, ‘Yeah, he just moved in.’

3 weeks ago

Playful quote about the spontaneous way cats become part of our lives, humorous and relatable.

Download image ↓

Commentary:
When the cats get better realtor deals than you 🏠🐈😸

adoption, animal, animal behavior, behavior, cat, cats, else, everyone, funny observation, humor, i, just, know, moved, number, observation, only, people, pet, pet adoption, pet story, picked, shelter, story, tiny

Trending Funny Quotes 👇

Random Funny Quotes

Social Media Stars ⭐

73 shares on Discord this month:

Science can’t explain it, but some hairs can grow up to a quarter inch overnight. Never in a good spot though.

61 shares on Pinterest this month:

Please don’t send me mixed signals, I don’t even understand the clear ones.

63 shares on Facebook this month:

The police said I was a ‘suspect’, but I prefer being called a ‘person of interest’.

75 shares on LinkedIn this month:

For someone with a dry phone, I’m on it way too much.

81 shares on WeChat this month:

They say “Time heals.” No, it doesn’t. I’m still mad.

92 shares on Twitch this month:

Starting tomorrow whatever life throws at me, I’m ducking so it hits someone else.

39 shares on LinkedIn this month:

If you feel depressed, go for a run. You will soon find out your physical health is far worse than your mental health.

79 shares on Discord this month:

Since the beginning of time itself, people have been wondering, what the hell is going on?

93 shares on LinkedIn this month:

When you clean your room so well that the only trash left is you.

87 shares on Discord this month:

You can tell it’s desperate times the way spam messages have gone from fantasies like ‘I am a prince and I want to give you money’ to ‘I am an HR manager and I have a real job for you!’

Activity Log ✨

Someone from 🇨🇲 has copied:

Dating apps aren’t working, time to walk into a cafe looking confused.

Someone from 🇧🇦 has bookmarked:

Paid my rent and slept in every room of my house this week, kitchen and laundry room next.

Someone from 🇴🇲 has bookmarked:

Enjoy your time with me, because I love to disappear.

Someone from 🇬🇦 has bookmarked:

I respect the moon because it controls three of our most precious entities: oceans, wolves & women.

Someone from 🇧🇼 has downloaded:

I get ignored so much, my name should be “terms and conditions”.

Someone from 🇸🇨 has copied:

Youngest siblings are literally weaponized incompetence, final boss.

Someone from 🇸🇩 has copied:

People that hate cats will come back as mice in their next life.

Someone from 🇷🇼 has bookmarked:

I have to stand in the shower about this.

Someone from 🇨🇬 has shared:

I’m like Pooh Bear. I just want to eat, hang with my homies, and go around pantsless.

Someone from 🇫🇯 has downloaded:

Need someone to feed me Doritos while I read, so I don’t mess up the pages. No weirdos.

Social Media Log 💫

Just landed via TikTok:

Sawing a hole in a table from underneath to steal a cake is a lot harder than cartoons would have you believe.

Going viral on X:

Hope this email finds you moonwalking out of work early.

Trending via Reddit:

I think nervous flatulence would be helpful if you were ever kidnapped.

Freshly posted on Pinterest:

I’ve decided that I’m going to underthink today.

Breaking via TikTok:

The one nice thing about your friends’ divorces is no one invites you to them.

Freshly posted on Twitch:

Marriage is just asking each other, “What do you want to do for dinner?” and then replying, “No, not that,” until death do us part.

Just shared via Snapchat:

I’ve jogged with my jogging pants about as often as I’ve rolled through the kitchen with kitchen roll.

Just landed via Reddit:

Now that food has replaced sex in my life, I can’t even get into my own pants.

Going bananas on Pinterest:

Don’t worry, guys. Together we can eliminate logic and reason on social media. I see some of you are already ahead of the game. Way to go!

Freshly posted on Discord:

Bruce Lee had a faster older brother named Sudden Lee.

Wordgag ツ

Activity Log ✨

I know so many people with cats, and only a tiny number of them went to a shelter and picked out a cat. Everyone else I know with a cat has a story that’s like, ‘Yeah, he just moved in.’

No show does a misunderstanding / miscommunication plot better than Modern Family does.

I don’t want to stand, Apple Watch. You stand.

Dear autocorrect, that’s not what I was trying to say. I’m getting tired of your shirt.

Only difference between me and someone in a psych ward is I’m outside.

Social Media Stars ⭐

Trending Topics 📁

Activity Log ✨

Wordgag ツ

Activity Log ✨

I know so many people with cats, and only a tiny number of them went to a shelter and picked out a cat. Everyone else I know with a cat has a story that’s like, ‘Yeah, he just moved in.’

Keep the laugh going 😂

No show does a misunderstanding / miscommunication plot better than Modern Family does.

Best thing about TikTok is you literally don’t need to follow anyone to have a good time.

I don’t want to stand, Apple Watch. You stand.

Dear autocorrect, that’s not what I was trying to say. I’m getting tired of your shirt.

Only difference between me and someone in a psych ward is I’m outside.

I love when someone texts “hey,” like I’m supposed to solve the rest.

Social Media Stars ⭐

Trending Topics 📁

Activity Log ✨