Wordgag ツ

10,000+ funny quotes

Activity Log ✨

Someone from 🇹🇯 has viewed:

I keep my eyes in great shape by rolling them constantly.

Someone from 🇮🇪 has bookmarked:

A real smart TV would increase the volume when you start eating chips.

Someone from 🇳🇴 has copied:

I would like to thank my arms for always being by my side. My legs for always supporting me. And my fingers because I can always count on them.

Someone from 🇸🇷 has copied:

Not smiling until Friday; nothing is funny this week.

Someone from 🇳🇴 has shared:

When you say “You’re going to hate me for this,” you’re making a very large assumption that I don’t hate you already.

Someone from 🇭🇹 has bookmarked:

Is ‘ugh’ an emotion? Because I fell it all the time.

Someone from 🇨🇦 has downloaded:

I am dressing for the job I want. I want to be a sweatpants model.

Someone from 🇰🇪 has copied:

My brain logged me out due to inactivity, and I can’t remember the password.

Someone from 🇪🇨 has downloaded:

Since you’re all so in love, switch phones for Valentine’s Day!

Someone from 🇭🇹 has downloaded:

“It’s been a long week!” Me, on a Tuesday.

Funny Quotes Data 🤓

New Funny Quotes

calculating…

Funny Quotes Total

15,753

Funny Quotes Topics

17,766

Funny Quotes Images

15,753

Updated

Feb 3, 2026

Users Online

3,361

Social Media Log 💫

Making waves on Snapchat:

How soon into a new relationship should you let her know you’re an idiot?

Breaking via Twitch:

Uber Eats “you forgot to finish your order” notification is funny because I didn’t forget, I just came to my senses.

Just shared via LinkedIn:

Flour company: What if we sell it in a paper bag that’s not fully sealed at the bottom?

Just landed via LinkedIn:

Is there a job where I can lay on the floor and listen to music?

Seen just now on Twitch:

Whoops, accidentally said I couldn’t make it before they even said the date.

Going viral on Reddit:

I need to eat healthier but donuts exist.

Just landed via Slack:

My favorite condiment is Worcestershire sauce. Why? It’s hard to say.

Freshly posted on Pinterest:

My kids didn’t follow me into the bathroom so now I’m scared to leave and find out what they got into instead.

Seen just now on Reddit:

One day you’re young and carefree and the next you sneeze too hard and hurt your neck.

Making waves on WeChat:

If you can figure out how to configure your default state to be slightly amused rather than slightly annoyed, you pretty much enter God Mode.

Funny cap quotes

Funny cap quotes bring instant smiles and good vibes wherever they go 😄🧢! Whether you’re rocking a snapback or a cozy beanie, these witty sayings add a splash of personality and humor to your look 🎉✨. Perfect for breaking the ice or showing off your playful side, they’re the ultimate accessory for fun lovers everywhere. Ready to turn heads and spark laughs? Let’s dive into the world of hilarious cap captions! 😂🔥

New funny cap quotes 👇

All funny cap quotes & images can be used for free for non-commercial purposes 👌

Random Funny Quotes

Social Media Stars ⭐

48 shares on Telegram this month:

I don’t have a favorite vampire. If you ask me, they all suck.

19 shares on Instagram this month:

I think I look pretty okay for my age. It’s just when I hold menus two feet from my face that I know the ruse is up.

40 shares on Instagram this month:

Need to become a tour guide. I’ve just realized it’s the only job I can think of that combines my loves of walking around and knowing more than everyone around me.

89 shares on Telegram this month:

The horror of being warned that the person you’re about to meet is “fine once you get to know them”.

50 shares on Instagram this month:

So, you’re telling me I’m just supposed to get up every day and keep living like this? Seems like a scam to me.

35 shares on Instagram this month:

Sorry I missed your call when I pressed decline.

39 shares on LinkedIn this month:

Better to be a wolf that everyone hates, than a donkey that everyone rides.

27 shares on Messenger this month:

I was blinded by a goddamn deer with a shiny red nose… No, officer, I haven’t been drinking.

18 shares on LinkedIn this month:

Ain’t nothing better than knowing you were right when everyone else thought you were crazy.

100 shares on Instagram this month:

I never though I’d be the kind of person who wakes up early to exercise. I was right.

Trending Topics 📁

activity communication day food frustration fun humor i irony joke just know life love me media people procrastination relationship sarcasm social social media someone technology time want work

Hot Jokes 💥

13 folks are currently checking 👀

I’ve had 50 birthdays in a row without being arrested, which I’d say is an impressive streak!

19 folks are currently checking 👀

American Feng Shui is when the grill doesn’t wobble.

19 folks are currently checking 👀

Save money by accidentally forgetting your wallet at home. Follow me for more financial tips and tricks.

19 folks are currently checking 👀

Beware. There are people in the grocery store that you know who want to chat with you. Stay vigilant.

13 folks are currently checking 👀

I like driving by myself. I just played the same song 36 times.

7 folks are currently checking 👀

Never lie to Indian girls. That red dot be recording everything.

23 folks are currently checking 👀

I love when my friends have quiet boyfriends. Like, girl, your dog is so good, sis.

18 folks are currently checking 👀

Can’t wait for this AI bubble to pop so we can all go back to normal, just like how the internet completely disappeared after the dot-com bubble popped.

25 folks are currently checking 👀

It’s like ten thousand tweets when all you need is a life.

16 folks are currently checking 👀

Music just makes living on this earth a little bit more bearable.

Funny Quotes Data 🤓

New Funny Quotes

calculating…

Funny Quotes Total

15,753

Funny Quotes Topics

17,766

Funny Quotes Images

15,753

Updated

Feb 3, 2026

Users Online

3,365

Activity Log ✨

Someone from 🇺🇾 has copied:

Hey, I’ve been thinking, and I think you should think for me.

Someone from 🇳🇱 has viewed:

I say “long story short,” and suddenly we’re in Act III with an intermission.

Someone from 🇦🇴 has downloaded:

You either have a full ketchup bottle in your house or an almost empty one. There’s no in-between.

Someone from 🇧🇫 has downloaded:

Being too stressed isn’t good for the baby. I’m not pregnant though, it’s just that I’m the baby.

Someone from 🇦🇬 has copied:

Ratatouille is hilarious because the villain wasn’t even evil; he just didn’t want food cooked by rats?!?

Someone from 🇹🇱 has downloaded:

I don’t want to end this year on bad terms with anybody. Could you please apologize to me?

Someone from 🇧🇴 has shared:

I lied, I’m jealous. I hope every girl who looks at you gets clipped by a meteor.

Someone from 🇪🇪 has bookmarked:

Unemployed folks always have esoteric knowledge, for some reason.

Someone from 🇱🇹 has viewed:

When I get to work, I always hide first, because a good worker is always hard to find.

Someone from 🇹🇼 has viewed:

I should’ve been a crow. They get to fly around looking goth as hell and seeking retribution. Instead, I have to go to an office and work on my ‘people skills.’

Social Media Log 💫

Shared recently on Discord:

Diplomacy is the art of sending someone to hell in such a way that they look forward to the journey.

Just landed via Snapchat:

Nothing is riskier than closing your eyes again in the morning for that extra minute of sleep.

Trending via LinkedIn:

Gonna go walk the beach and stare annoyingly at couples. May even growl as I pass by.

Seen just now on Snapchat:

Sorry for how I acted when there were multiple noises happening at the same time.

Spreading quickly via Slack:

“I asked ChatGPT”. I confided in Amazon. I confessed to McDonald’s. I have an inside joke with Exxon Mobil.

Going bananas on WeChat:

My phone just filmed a 2 hour documentary about life inside my purse.

Just shared via Pinterest:

I’ve reached the age where people talk loudly and slowly to me.

Freshly posted on Instagram:

We really do need a separate grocery store for people who’ve been on Earth before.

Broadcasted on Messenger:

I don’t hate you, but I hope you run out of hot water before you’re finished your shower.

Live now on Snapchat:

Just seen the cost of funerals and no wonder people are living longer.

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Made with ❤️ in Sydney ☀️🌴