Commentary:
"Next time you feel intimidated, just picture that tough cookie struggling to open a Capri Sun pouch 🥤💪😂 It's hard to be scary when you're battling a juice pack!"
199 Funny childhood quotes
Getting money from the Tooth Fairy is a gateway drug to organ trafficking.
Commentary:
"Watch out, kiddos! That tooth money might lead you down a dark path to becoming a tooth mafia boss 😂💸💰 Just remember, no tooth is worth selling your molars for! 🦷🚫 #ToothFairyGoneWrong"
It’s interesting growing up and learning that most adults are not smart. I had my suspicions as a kid, but I didn’t think the situation was this dire.
Commentary:
Adulting: When you realize 'winging it' is the universal strategy! 🚀🤓😂
My friends put their kid to bed and then made us ice cream sundaes, which is exactly what I assumed was happening when my parents put me to bed.
Commentary:
I knew those bedtime stories were just a sweet cover-up for sundae parties! 🍦😄
My youngest started kindergarten today and I cried, but mostly for his teachers.
Commentary:
"Today marks the start of my youngest's academic journey! 📚🎒 I shed a tear (or two) as he embarked on his kindergarten adventure, but let's be real – I cried mostly for his teachers who now have to deal with his boundless energy and endless questions! 🤣🍎✏️ #TeacherAppreciation"
Nobody plays better together than siblings being told it’s bedtime.
Commentary:
"Ah, the magical moment when siblings transform from rivals to allies in the epic battle against bedtime! 🤣🌙 Who knew sibling solidarity could be so strong when facing the dreaded lights out? #SiblingGoals"
My real introduction to classical music came from watching Tom & Jerry cartoons as a kid. Also how I got into sadism.
Commentary:
"Who knew chasing a mouse around could lead to such refined tastes? 🐭🎶 But hey, at least it's better than chasing people around for fun! 😏 #ClassicalMusic #TomAndJerry"
I just want someone to miss me the way my 3 year old nephew misses me when I go to the washroom.
Commentary:
"Sometimes we all just want to be missed like we're the only source of entertainment and snacks in the whole wide world 🚽👶💔 #nephewlove"
My favorite childhood memory is not paying bills.
Commentary:
Ah, the blissful days of being bill-free! 😂💸 Who needs responsibilities when you can just enjoy being carefree and financially unconcerned like a kid again? #AdultingCanBeOverrated
Strict parents raise good liars.
Commentary:
"Ah, the fine art of deception perfected under the watchful eye of strict parents! 🕵️♂️🤥 It's like they're training their kids for a secret agent career in the world of fibs and white lies. 🤫😂 Just remember, honesty is the best policy… unless you're dodging a curfew check!"