Wordgag ツ

10,000+ funny quotes

Activity Log ✨

Someone from 🇹🇴 has copied:

I may join the cicadas this summer and just scream for six weeks straight.

Someone from 🇲🇻 has bookmarked:

If you relate to me, get some help!

Someone from 🇳🇬 has downloaded:

No more looking back in anger. It’s time to look forward in anger.

Someone from 🇷🇸 has shared:

I once had a psychic girlfriend, she left me before we met.

Someone from 🇪🇹 has bookmarked:

I’m afraid to go to therapy — what if they fix me and I lose my funny?

Someone from 🇳🇦 has shared:

No open job postings for “Warrior Poet” found in your area. Please try another search.

Someone from 🇺🇸 has shared:

Sorry I missed your call. I saw that you were calling and immediately threw my phone into an active volcano.

Someone from 🇧🇸 has downloaded:

Blocking someone isn’t enough, I also want them to get lice.

Someone from 🇰🇪 has shared:

Maybe the reason Miss Piggy is still single is she has a fear of kermitment.

Someone from 🇸🇾 has downloaded:

They are all liars, so just pick the tallest and enjoy.

Funny Quotes Data 🤓

New Funny Quotes

calculating…

Funny Quotes Total

15,753

Funny Quotes Topics

17,766

Funny Quotes Images

15,753

Jan 31, 2026

3,432

Social Media Log 💫

Broadcasted on Facebook:

If I had just one hour left to live, I’d spend it in Math class… it never ends.

Spotted on YouTube:

Y’all ever postpone an outfit? Like, nah, let me save this for a better day? Same.

Freshly posted on X:

Just got revenge on someone who wronged me many, many years ago. Never relax, I’m coming.

Just shared via Snapchat:

Can someone please help me, I’m still at the Fyre Festival.

Broadcasted on Telegram:

I always stop the microwave before it beeps because it’s not the boss of me.

Shared recently on WeChat:

My dream is being pitted against the world’s greatest AI in a writing contest and crafting a story that’s so beautiful that I make the computer cry.

Breaking via Pinterest:

“I’m asking Santa to bring some of you a sense of humor for Christmas.”

Going viral on Threads:

Porn looks so funny when you’re not horny.

Making waves on Slack:

May your life one day be as beautiful as you portray it on social media.

Broadcasted on Threads:

I miss phone booths. We used to train our immune system in those things.

Funny crawling quotes

Funny crawling quotes 🐾 bring out the giggles in those wobbly first moves and tiny adventures! Whether it’s baby steps or sneaky sneaks, these playful lines capture the charm and chaos of crawling moments. Ready to laugh, relate, and maybe even reminisce? Let’s dive into the cutest stage of motion with a splash of humor and a whole lot of smiles! 😄👶✨

New funny crawling quotes 👇

So a baby crawls across the floor to it’s bottle and it’s cute but when I do it Im in need of an intervention?

1 week ago

across, adult, adult behavior, baby, behavior, bottle, crawling, cute, floor, funny observation, humor, i, intervention, need, observation
Dying and being reincarnated as a beetle, and crawling to my old body’s grave, and digging down and living in my old ribcage.

4 weeks ago

afterlife, beetle, being, crawling, digging, dying, grave, humor, living, old, reincarnation, ribcage
Love crawling into bed like it’s a spa retreat, only to wake up like I survived a bar fight.

3 months ago

bar, bar fight, bed, crawling, fight, humor, i, love, only, relaxation, retreat, sleep, spa, struggle, wake, wake up

All funny crawling quotes & images can be used for free for non-commercial purposes 👌

Funny Quotes Collections

✨ New Funny Quotes

Social Media Stars ⭐

10 shares on YouTube this month:

“I’m tired of being forced to eat microplastics. I’m ready for big plastics now.”

17 shares on LinkedIn this month:

Men shouldn’t be allowed to download any app other than Wikipedia.

33 shares on YouTube this month:

Forgetting your phone at home is the modern equivalent of leaving your sword behind in medieval times.

72 shares on Twitch this month:

Don’t ever let a recipe tell you how much cheese you need to add, everyone knows cheese is measured with the heart.

30 shares on LinkedIn this month:

Unpopular opinion: I do enjoy third-wheeling if the couple is fun.

31 shares on Reddit this month:

Sorry for my bad behavior. Mercury is in gatorade or whatever.

53 shares on Messenger this month:

Really looking forward to the day my teenager starts speaking English again.

65 shares on Discord this month:

I don’t have time for anything that doesn’t set my soul on fire.

62 shares on Twitch this month:

What do you call it when everything pisses you off but you’re good at not murdering people?

88 shares on Pinterest this month:

Remember when tweets were like: party rocking with a mouse tonight. Piece of cheese gonna have a big bite.

Trending Topics 📁

Hot Jokes 💥

20 folks are currently checking 👀

I stopped adding “Let me know if you have any more questions!” to my emails because don’t email me again.

7 folks are currently checking 👀

If you’re happy and you know it, you’re clearly not paying enough attention.

9 folks are currently checking 👀

People don’t catch bullets with their teeth anymore, get out there and practice.

25 folks are currently checking 👀

Gonna start using “with all dude respect”.

17 folks are currently checking 👀

I love how you get on Twitter, and all your thoughts are already in someone else’s tweet.

22 folks are currently checking 👀

I love spending my parents’ money, they must pay for bringing me into this world.

21 folks are currently checking 👀

Did anyone ask the daylight if it wanted to be saved?

24 folks are currently checking 👀

Explain it to me like I’m five then do it for me like I’m one hundred.

21 folks are currently checking 👀

I’m so single right now that I stood on a cliff and shouted, “I love you,” and my echo replied, “I just wanna be friends.”

16 folks are currently checking 👀

I’m not addicted to coffee. We’re just very close.

Funny Quotes Data 🤓

New Funny Quotes

calculating…

Funny Quotes Total

15,753

Funny Quotes Topics

17,766

Funny Quotes Images

15,753

Updated

Jan 31, 2026

Users Online

3,691

Activity Log ✨

Someone from 🇯🇵 has shared:

“Cut my life into pieces” screamed the earthworm and threw itself in front of my spade.

Someone from 🇷🇺 has downloaded:

I thrive in a waiting room. You need me to sit in a chair and look at my phone? No worries, love, I do this at home.

Someone from 🇱🇮 has viewed:

Pinterest algorithm is like a loving dad who fills the whole fridge with oranges after seeing you enjoy one.

Someone from 🇧🇩 has downloaded:

They should invent a type of sleeping where you wake up feeling rested.

Someone from 🇦🇿 has viewed:

There should be a variant of fencing with two guys trying to kiss one another.

Someone from 🇬🇷 has bookmarked:

Sometimes, fasting from people is also important.

Someone from 🇦🇲 has viewed:

Not now, I’m befriending a crow and teaching it how to deliver handwritten love notes.

Someone from 🇺🇿 has viewed:

My toxic trait is optimism.

Someone from 🇮🇳 has bookmarked:

My wife rearranged the kitchen cabinets, and now I’ll never eat again.

Someone from 🇳🇬 has shared:

My wife just admitted a mistake. What do I have to do now? What does this mean for my future? Help me!

Social Media Log 💫

Broadcasted on X:

How much chocolate is too much chocolate before it is technically no longer a salad?

Making waves on Messenger:

“What do your tattoos mean?” They mean I can sit still for a long time.

Broadcasted on Pinterest:

My bit for Thanksgiving is going to be constantly bringing up politics, but pronouncing every politician’s name slightly incorrectly.

Just landed via Threads:

I want to sleep but my brain won’t stop talking to itself.

Freshly posted on WeChat:

Mental state: just googled “When will the sun explode.”

Spotted on TikTok:

One thing I hate more than a liar is a liar that thinks I’m dumb.

Live now on Messenger:

I didn’t lose a girlfriend, I gained an enemy.

Just landed via Pinterest:

Sports bars exist. There should be bars for monitoring the situation.

Making waves on Facebook:

We are talking about how beautiful and cool you are behind your back.

Spreading quickly via TikTok:

Stages of Christmas shopping: 1. There’s plenty of time. 2. Oh no!

© 2026. All rights reserved.

Made with ❤️ in Sydney ☀️🌴