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10,000+ funny quotes

Activity Log ✨

Someone from 🇧🇩 has copied:

There is no bigger day for microwaves than the 26th day of December. This is their Olympics.

Someone from 🇱🇻 has copied:

Might put on a bikini and run through your DMs.

Someone from 🇺🇦 has viewed:

Why does the phone ring longer when you’re ignoring the call?

Someone from 🇦🇷 has copied:

“I read 20 books this year!” That’s nothing. I read 50,000 tweets.

Someone from 🇧🇦 has copied:

Someone asked me if I had any hobbies and I panicked and said “lasagna”.

Someone from 🇸🇾 has copied:

When buying presents I like to think, what would Jesus have got you? So yeah, enjoy your fish sandwich.

Someone from 🇰🇪 has shared:

They should invent a way to delete other people’s posts.

Someone from 🇬🇹 has viewed:

Mud season creeps up on us every year, destroying hearts and minds as well as light grey carpeting.

Someone from 🇲🇼 has viewed:

Buying a new phone isn’t even satisfying anymore. It’s literally just your old phone with a haircut.

Someone from 🇬🇭 has downloaded:

Start each day with a positive thought, like: “I can go back to bed in just 17 short hours.”

Funny Quotes Data 🤓

New Funny Quotes

1857 added this month

Funny Quotes Total

12,019

Funny Quotes Topics

14,813

Funny Quotes Images

12,019

Updated

4 minutes ago

Users Online

3,456

Social Media Log 💫

Trending via Threads:

If a beer is 8 bucks, it’s a show. If a beer is 14 bucks, it’s a concert.

Just shared via TikTok:

Only time I believe a man is when he tells me that I’m pretty.

Just shared via Discord:

Hello 911? Yes, my wife is forcing me to walk over to meet the neighbors.

Just shared via Slack:

Grok just sounds like something that might try to eat me.

Going viral on WhatsApp:

Harmonicas are basically for people who like to hear music while they spit.

Going viral on Reddit:

Don’t worry, better days are coming. They are called Friday, Saturday and Sunday.

Trending via WeChat:

Car naps hit different, especially when you are the one driving.

Making waves on Instagram:

I just want everyone to know that somebody cares. Not me, but somebody does.

Breaking via YouTube:

Okay, seen enough, someone put a blanket over my cage.

Seen just now on LinkedIn:

Tequila won’t fix your life, but it’s worth a shot.

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Welcome to Wordgag! 😉✌️ Enjoy endless laughter with our collection of funny quotes guaranteed to crack you up. 😂💥

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activity communication day food frustration fun humor i irony joke just know life love me media people procrastination relationship sarcasm social social media someone technology time want work

Funny Quotes Data 🤓

New Funny Quotes

1857 added this month

Funny Quotes Total

12,019

Funny Quotes Topics

14,813

Funny Quotes Images

12,019

Updated

4 minutes ago

Users Online

3,452

Funny Quotes of the Month 🚀

Funny Quotes of the Year ⭐

Activity Log ✨

Someone from 🇲🇳 has copied:

One of the toughest jobs in parenting is serving the inevitable eviction notice on your kid’s pillow fort.

Someone from 🇨🇱 has shared:

The best part of vacation with your extended family is talking shit about them on the trip home.

Someone from 🇵🇹 has copied:

Welcome to your 40s: your chin looks lonely, here’s another one.

Someone from 🇨🇻 has viewed:

Apparently, everyone on the Zoom calls outside my office finds my singing distracting.

Someone from 🇧🇼 has bookmarked:

The 80s were wild, man. You had bands naming themselves after predatory cats with hearing problems.

Someone from 🇩🇪 has viewed:

Yes, my sex drive is higher than my will to live, and what about it?

Someone from 🇨🇳 has bookmarked:

My boyfriend always complains that I never smile, but he’s the one who wanted a serious relationship.

Someone from 🇭🇺 has shared:

Going to the beach is 99% getting ready for the beach and 1% enjoying the beach.

Someone from 🇨🇲 has viewed:

Eating wings is the opposite of flying.

Someone from 🇬🇶 has bookmarked:

Perhaps an evening in the meditation cage will soothe you.

Social Media Log 💫

Trending via Pinterest:

If you love something, set it free. If it comes back to you, then you love a boomerang.

Spotted on Facebook:

Before you try to save someone, make sure you’re not interrupting their karma.

Just shared via TikTok:

Every app is a dating app if you are creepy enough.

Freshly posted on YouTube:

I like to think of myself as an onion. Peel back the many layers and deep down inside you’ll find a smaller, more anxious onion.

Going viral on WeChat:

Ever read something so magnificently stupid that you have to just stare into space for a little while and reconcile with your brain for having been subjected to it?

Live now on Messenger:

Your honor, I was in my villain era at the time of those incidents.

Spreading quickly via WeChat:

“I asked ChatGPT,” “I asked Grok.” Well, I just made some shit up, and people believe me because I’m well read and use big words.

Seen just now on Reddit:

When I quit my job I’m setting one last OOO message that just says “your email will never find me again”

Going viral on Messenger:

There’s someone in our team who behaves horribly to me and whenever I have to type his name, I’ve taken to using a slightly smaller font size than for everyone else’s.

Going viral on WhatsApp:

Sisters are so important. How else would my mom find out all the stuff I didn’t want her to know.

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